Tag Archives: Fantasy

#10: Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989)

28 Wednesday Jan 2015

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Indiana Jones is back to find the Holy Grail,
His father Henry’s disappeared but left a learned trail.
When Walter Donovan commissions him to seek it out,
Jones finds the journal of his father, bookish and devout.
 
In Venice, Dr. Elsa Schneider joins him to assist,
For underneath a library, dark catacombs exist.
They find a clue but barely flee the rat-infested tomb,
Before the fez men follow them and nearly seal their doom.
 
To Austria, they fly to find his father captured by
A group of Nazi Grail-pursuers in a castle high.
The pair of Joneses reunite and make the room combust,
But not before a revelation and betrayal of trust.
 
Two chases later, both of them head to the Middle East,
Where Henry’s captured on a tank and narrowly released.
The Canyon of the Crescent Moon is where their journey ends,
And Indy’s forced to find the Holy Grail as death portends.
 
Through deadly trials, Indy goes to claim the waiting prize,
And as the villains follow him, their choices are not wise.
Though history is lost, our heroes let it go, dismayed,
But ride into the sunset until their next escapade.
_____________________
 

I know most people tend to prefer Raiders of the Lost Ark, but for me Last Crusade is that rare threequel that surpasses the original. It borrows the best elements from Raiders: a Biblical MacGuffin, a booby-trapped temple, Nazis as the villains, Sallah and Marcus Brody, and a gruesome (though not as gruesome) death for the villain.

What puts Last Crusade over its predecessor, though, can be summed up in two words: Sean Connery. Harrison Ford is always a blast as the famous title character, but to make his father a mild-mannered James Bond ups both the heart and the humor. Rather than being the unflappable hero of the first film, Indy has a mental match in his estranged father, who may lack the level-headed physicality but is more like his son than either recognize. Henry Jones, Sr.’s dedication to his work made him a distant, poor father, but his son clearly inherited a similar commitment, not to mention his womanizing tendencies. Putting them together allows for some humorously contentious dialogue and some realistic father/son moments ranging from disapproval to grief to shared devotion.

Of course, this wouldn’t be an Indiana Jones film without some outstanding action sequences, and it doesn’t disappoint. While nothing quite matches the truck chase in Raiders, the film as a whole is a nonstop thrill ride, with ancient flammable crypts, speedboat chases, motorcycle chases, airplane chases, tank chases, and some clever booby traps to match the beginning of the first film. The opening sequence is a stroke of genius too; while not directly connected to the main plot, as are the beginnings of the other films, it gives an unexpected glimpse of Jones in his youth. River Phoenix pulls it off, with a comic-book-style train chase that offers action and some answers about Jones himself.

While the film may just seem like a series of chase scenes, it offers all the humor and twists of the original, just in a slightly more family friendly package. I especially like the scene in which the sole profanity is chastised by the elder Jones as blasphemy, one of the few instances in modern-day films where it is called out and condemned, allowing for a telling illustration of the differences between father and son. The final resolution of the quest not only confirms the authenticity of the sacred artifact in question (and the myths surrounding it) but contrasts the blind ambition of Elsa with the wiser discernment of the Joneses. Plus, it ends on the most perfect of perfect notes, a final ride into the sunset, a fantastic wrap-up for the franchise…oh, wait, yeah, there was that fourth movie. Still, this could have been an unparalleled conclusion.

Decidedly better than Temple of Doom and Crystal Skull and just a little better than Raiders, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade is one of the most enjoyable actioners ever made. While not quite as iconic as Raiders, it still remains influential, even for Spielberg himself, who used a similar motorcycle chase in his Adventures of Tintin. Though my VC pointed out that Last Crusade made a helpless tagalong out of Marcus Brody, who had more dignity in the first film, it doesn’t get much better than the dual star power of Ford and Connery.

Best line: (the butler) “This is a castle, and we have many tapestries, but if you are a Scottish lord, then I am Mickey Mouse!”   (Indy to Elsa, with Scottish accent) “How dare he!” [punches his lights out]

VC’s best line: (Nazi leader) “Dr. Jones?”   (Indy and Henry, simultaneously) “Yes?”

 
Rank: 60 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

283 Followers and Counting

#11: The Princess Bride (1987)

27 Tuesday Jan 2015

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Listen, dear viewers, and you shall be read
A story just like a sick child in bed,
About miracles, fencing, escapes, and true love,
Promises made and the efforts thereof
And a farm boy named Westley thought to be dead.
 
He said to his love that he would return
And not a thing could keep him away,
But Buttercup is upset to learn
That the Dread Pirate Roberts came to slay.
Burdened by grief, she catches the eye
Of Prince Humperdinck, a duplicitous guy.
Ere they are wed, she is caught by three
Colorful, talented killers-to-be,
Vizzini, Montoya, and Fezzik, who flee.
 
They are followed, though, by a man in black,
Coming to kidnap their prisoner back,
Facing the three of them, one by one,
Defeating each, and once he has won,
From Buttercup, Westley gets a smack.
The two through the Fire Swamp take their track
And fight when enormous rats attack.
Catching them, Prince Humperdinck won’t share
That he’s locked Westley in the Pit of Despair.
 
Meanwhile, Montoya and Fezzik unite,
Planning revenge for a family crime,
But they need Westley to plan it this time.
The two of them free him, though mostly dead,
Revive him with a miracle bite,
And before the wedding bells can chime,
Help him inside ere the couple can wed.
 
When he finds the man he’s been hunting for,
Montoya takes revenge at last,
And because true love is unsurpassed,
When Westley challenges pain galore,
Prince Humperdinck will not compete
Against a man death can’t defeat.
When Buttercup and the trio of men
Depart for safer hill and glen,
The two lovers kiss as never before.
You wouldn’t mind hearing the tale once more?
As you wish; I’ll come again.
______________________
 

The Princess Bride is one of the most perfect films around, not in any grand or profound way, but in its timeless, endlessly amusing creation of a modern fairy tale, based off the book by William Goldman, who also wrote the screenplay. I know I’m not alone in saying that this is a film I could watch any day of the week, while quoting much of the ingenious dialogue. It never ceases to entertain, and I think everyone involved in its production realized what a special film they produced.

The cast is a treasure trove of comedic talent, from Wallace Shawn as disdainful Vizzini to Andre the Giant as strong but gentle “land mass” Fezzik to Billy Crystal’s hilarious cameo as Miracle Max, who proves that chocolate does indeed have life-giving properties. Cary Elwes as Westley and Robin Wright as Buttercup (one of her first roles) are ideal starry-eyed lovers, the one gallant and dashingly British and the other beautiful, though rather helpless. The film is well-recognized for its abundance of potent quotables, and every character gets a memorable line, often several. Who can forget Mandy Patinkin as Inigo Montoya spouting his rehearsed threat to his father’s killer, or Wallace Shawn’s “Inconceivable,” said as only he can? Some droll moments are also given to the villains, Chris Sarandon as self-assured Prince Humperdinck (I wonder if his first name is Engelbert) and Christopher Guest as soft-spoken sadist Count Rugen. Even small roles like Mel Smith as the Albino and Peter Cook as the Impressive Clergyman get some Monte Python-style humor from their unexpected voices.

Though The Princess Bride parodies typical fairy tale tropes, it embraces them as well, like a more sincere version of a Mel Brooks comedy. Consider when Vizzini calls out “Behold, the Cliffs of Insanity!” followed by some overly dramatic music, yet the cliffs themselves do play a role in the tale, and their pretentious name doesn’t preclude real danger. The film’s depicted framework of a bedtime story, read by Peter Falk, lends the film a detached fascination, so that the audience can laugh while also becoming invested in the characters’ struggles. Quite a lot of work went into the filming as well, particularly the expert duel between Elwes and Patinkin, who did all but the somersaults themselves. Moments of whimsy alternate with moments of genuine passion to create a family film for all ages (though a single profanity from Fred Savage as the boy was unnecessary). The Oscar-nominated song “Storybook Love,” sung by Willy DeVille, is also worthy of a place in my End Credits Song Hall of Fame.

As I said, I can watch this film forever, but it was only recently that my attention was brought to a small but important detail. The Princess Bride is a Christmas movie! I didn’t believe it at first, but at the very beginning, there are lights and snow outside and a small lighted tree out in the hall, as well as a Santa hanging behind Peter Falk the whole time. I always assumed the book was a get-well-soon gift, but it’s a Christmas present. Now we all have one more reason to watch it, as if we needed another excuse. It’s got everything a good fairy tale needs and a great deal more besides.

Best lines (I wish I could just say the whole movie): (Vizzini, when Westley doesn’t fall from the Cliffs) “He didn’t fall? Inconceivable!”  (Inigo) “You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.”
 
(Inigo Montoya) “Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.”
 
(Miracle Max, when he lifts and drops Westley’s lifeless arm) “I’ve seen worse.”
 
(Westley, after knocking out the giant Fezzik) “I do not envy you the headache you will have when you awake. But for now, rest well and dream of large women.”
 
(Westley, after returning from almost-death) “Who are you? Are we enemies? Why am I on this wall? Where is Buttercup?”   (Inigo) “Let me explain. [pauses]  No, there is too much. Let me sum up.”
 
(Westley and the Grandfather) “As you wish.”
 
 
Rank: 60 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

283 Followers and Counting

#12: Beauty and the Beast (1991)

27 Tuesday Jan 2015

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(Best sung to “The Mob Song”)
 
In the countryside of France,
Where the bakers say “Bonjour,”
Lives a lovely mademoiselle who’s always reading books galore.
Belle just doesn’t quite fit in,
But still that doesn’t stop Gaston
From insisting that she marry him for his conceited brawn.
 
Through the mist, through the woods,
When Belle’s father tries to travel,
He ends up inside a castle dark and grim.
Belle protests and suggests
That the castle’s beastly owner
Make her stay his prisoner instead of him.
 
She’s afraid of her host and his temper,
And alarmed but then charmed and impressed
By the servants and shows
And a spellbinding rose,
Till the beast makes her flee,
Too oppressed.
 
While en route, though, the brute
Saves her life, and so from then on,
Their relationship begins to slowly grow.
When the Beast comes to love
And Belle sees her father needs her,
Her detainer has the heart to let her go.
 
But Gaston has a plan to coerce her
To be his, but she will not be played.
When she speaks of the Beast,
Gaston’s rage is increased,
And he rallies best and least
To invade.
 
Servants fight and defend;
As the raiders are assaulted,
Bold Gaston will not be halted from his prey.
Both engage, and both fall,
But true love will conquer all,
And thus without a curse’s thrall,
Love will stay.
_____________________
 

Beauty and the Beast is the epitome of a Disney fairy tale musical, complete with magic mirror, enchanted castle, magical rose, bleak curse, stunning animation, and Oscar-winning music of the highest order. Though preceded by The Little Mermaid, this was the undeniable sign that the Disney Renaissance was well under way and that animated musicals could be taken seriously, even nominated for Best Picture.

First off, the animation is gorgeous, a combination of traditionally animated characters and certain CGI backgrounds that allow for some astoundingly beautiful moments, like the famous ballroom dance beneath the chandelier. While Hunchback and Tarzan had similarly striking visuals, Beauty and the Beast was one of the first Disney films to possess a smoothness of line and motion unseen in strictly hand-drawn features thanks to a new CAPS technology (technically, The Rescuers Down Under was the first).

The beauty of the animation is matched only by the music, which garnered two of Alan Menken’s well-deserved Oscars for Best Score and Best Song. From the very first musical number incorporating Belle, Gaston, and the entire village, my VC could tell that this was not a typical cartoon with tunes, but a new breed of Broadway-quality musical that was sure to be adapted to the stage, which it was. Her favorite song, though, is Gaston’s clever tavern chantey, one of the few villain songs to not be or even sound villainous. Though “Be Our Guest” and the Oscar-winning title song are more well-known, I’ve always preferred the dark, rhythmic “Mob Song” right before the castle siege.

The film is also notable for its moral themes. For once, the heroine is not a rebellious girl eager to disobey silly rules, but a noble daughter sacrificing herself for her father. The lesson of “beauty lies within” is established from the initial prologue, but rather than being a generic villain, Gaston illustrates the opposite, that evil can also lie within even with outward beauty. The romance between Belle and the Beast is not rushed, and even though its growth is depicted through the typical musical montage, the sudden sacrifice preceding it allowed a solid starting point for the Beast’s sudden change of heart and manner.

Beauty and the Beast is the purest example of a fairy tale adaptation I can imagine, created when they could be light-hearted or dark on their own terms without the grim revisionism of nowadays. Disney hit its stride with this musical masterpiece, a film in which music, characters, and animation seem to converge effortlessly into enjoyable entertainment for kids and adults alike.

Best line: (Gaston’s admirers, during his song) “For there’s no one as burly or brawny/ [Gaston] As you see, I’ve got biceps to spare,/ [Lefou] “Not a bit of him scraggly or scrawny,/ [Gaston] That’s right, and every last inch of me’s covered with hair!” and (Gaston) “I use antlers in all of my decorating!”

 
Rank: 60 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

283 Followers and Counting

#13: Groundhog Day (1993)

25 Sunday Jan 2015

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Little interest has Phil Connors in the mirth of Groundhog Day,
But as Pittsburgh’s weatherman, another visit he must pay.
Punxsutawney welcomes him and his producer, lovely Rita,
But, remaining misanthropic, he would not want to repeat a
Day within this backwards town enthralled by shadows and a rat.
Keen on February 3rd, he finds the 2nd back at bat.
 
Every day, he wakens to the same old song and same old day,
And the shortest of the months becomes the lengthiest replay.
Unsure what to do at first, he soon finds things to break and borrow,
Loving, eating, then repeating, living like there’s no tomorrow.
Yet his sanity breaks down from all the pointless repetition,
Since his goal of wooing Rita never once comes to fruition.
 
Further tries to end the cycle get him nowhere, till the day
When he vents his own fatigue and Rita tries to help and stay.
Now his wiser, better goal is to improve himself, no scheme,
Helping with his near-omniscience, rising in the town’s esteem.
By the time he’s nearly perfect for the girl he’s come to love,
Groundhog Day releases Phil with sudden snowfall from above.
_____________________
 

Harold Ramis’s Groundhog Day is an astounding comedy, because it constantly repeats itself and yet is endlessly watchable. While not the first instance of a time loop in fiction (Star Trek: The Next Generation did such an episode the previous year called ”Cause and Effect,” and there have been books and stories that came long before), but it depicts a 24-hour loop so fully and entertainingly that it is now the go-to example of time repetition. The recent Edge of Tomorrow was always compared with Groundhog Day, not with its lesser-known predecessors.

Easily Bill Murray’s best role, Phil Connors is the kind of cynical jerk he plays so well, condescending, sarcastic, the perfect candidate for an unexplained time paradox makeover. Over the course of his many Groundhog Days, he displays the full spectrum of reactions to his helpless situation: confusion, revelry, manipulation, depression, suicide, self-progress, and eventual altruism. The way he responds to the quirky townspeople of Punxsutawney, at first with disdain, then with fond geniality and authentic concern, clearly reveals his change of heart, as does his relationship with Rita, a down-to-earth Andie McDowall. All the repetition makes for certain scenes to be easily memorable, such as that buoyant polka music, the alarm clock’s Sonny and Cher theme, and Phil’s run-in with Stephen Tobolowsky’s geekily weird Ned…Ryerson! Bing! I especially love that groundhog gnawing the air at the steering wheel. Plus, George Fenton’s song “Weatherman” at the beginning is repeated at the end, thus making it eligible for my End Credits Song Hall of Fame.

Critics have discussed the film’s deeper themes, like Buddhist transcendence and Catholic purgatory, evidence that a good comedy is not simply a string of jokes but contains the potential for profound questions and intelligent discussion. While I prefer to just watch the film for its own hilarious sake, small details reveal divine presence, such as when Phil’s claim of being a god is contradicted by his futile efforts at saving a life. One does wonder whether Phil’s situation is intended as a blessing or a curse, since I can see myself being exasperated at the constant déjà vu and delighted with all the time at my disposal, but I suppose it is mainly an opportunity, to improve himself, assist the town, and become the perfect man for Rita. Whether for the delightful humor or the more profound messages, one can enjoy Groundhog Day time after time after time.

Best lines (so many): (Phil Connors) “Well, what if there is no tomorrow? There wasn’t one today.”
 
[my VC’s favorite]  (Phil) “Do you ever have déjà vu, Mrs. Lancaster?”  (Mrs. Lancaster) “I don’t think so, but I could check with the kitchen.”
 
(Phil’s piano teacher, as he is playing for her) “Not bad… Mr. Connors, you say this is your first lesson?” (Phil) “Yes, but my father was a piano mover, so…”
 
 
Rank: 60 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

283 Followers and Counting

#17: The Wizard of Oz (1939)

21 Wednesday Jan 2015

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(Best sung to “Over the Rainbow”)
 
In a black-and-white Kansas, on a farm,
Sweet young Dorothy fears that Toto will come to harm.
From this desolate landscape, she takes flight
To a land full of color by a tornado’s might.
 
Her high arrival kills a witch,
Which pleases Munchkins whose high pitches hail her,
But Dorothy’s a target soon;
A western wicked witch with broom
Tries to assail her.
 
On the Yellow Brick Road, she makes her way
To the Wizard of Oz, who might send her home that day.
She makes friends on her journey who take part:
Scarecrow wants brains, and Tin Man dreams of a loving heart.
 
A craven lion needing nerve
Joins them in hopes that Oz will serve their hoping.
But first they must confront the Witch,
Who takes the girl without a hitch
And leaves her moping.
 
When the witch has been melted, randomly,
They return to the Wizard for their gratuity.
Though the fraud does his utmost, once he’s flown,
That’s when Dorothy knows that there is no place like home.
___________________
 

As prominent as Indiana Jones is, The Wizard of Oz is even more ingrained into popular culture. Without any reservations, I can call it the best movie for children ever made. A uniquely American fantasy, it’s imaginative and well-crafted enough to create the ravishing fantasy world of Oz, but also simple and sincere enough to appeal to the youngest of viewers.

Its hallowed spot in our culture owes much to how old it is, released in 1939 along with other classics like Gone with the Wind and Mr. Smith Goes to Washington. Because of its age, even grandparents recall seeing it when they were children, and it effectively brings out the child in everyone, whether to sing along to the Munchkins’ “Ding, dong! The Witch is dead!” or to shed a tear at Dorothy’s sappy but still heartwarming appreciation of home sweet home. If the film were made today (which it wouldn’t be, of course; the ingenious switch from black-and-white to color is also a product of perfect cinematic timing), I doubt it would receive the same universal praise. For many critics, sentimentality is easy to condemn, and only uncompromising nostalgia makes it into something enchanting.

Once Dorothy reaches Oz, most of the acting is, well, overacting, as was typical of the time, but rather than laughable histrionics, this lends the film an enhanced storybook quality, as if a parent were reading the lines of a bedtime story and pretending for their delighted listener. Judy Garland exudes innocent wonder as she enters the rainbow world of Oz, like a precursor to Lucy stepping through the wardrobe. She’s the Alice-like straight-girl to the unusually charming comrades she obtains in Oz/Wonderland, allowing the audience to marvel at their peculiarity while accepting them as lovable companions of childhood. Ray Bolger as the Scarecrow, Jack Haley as the Tin Man, and especially Bert Lahr as the Cowardly Lion are as synonymous with the film as Margaret Hamilton’s Wicked Witch of the West, the most iconic witch of all time, complete with broom, pointy hat, green skin, sinister cackle, pyrotechnics, and armies of memorable minions.

These aspects alone might have been enough to make it a childhood favorite, but the filmmakers outdid themselves in every way. While many scenes are obviously on an elaborate set, the set design is phenomenal, particularly the bright-hued (and very small) Munchkinland and the Witch’s cliffside castle. Plus, there’s outstanding choreography, whether with the crowds of the Emerald City or just the four main characters skipping down the Yellow Brick Road. Plus, there’s instantly recognizable quotes aplenty (“I’ll get you, my pretty…and your little dog too”; “Lions and tigers and bears, oh my”; “Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain”). Plus, there’s the fantastical special effects (which surprisingly did not win an Oscar), some dated but others still impressive, like the realistic twister and the fanciful costumes. Plus, there’s the most classic of classic soundtracks from Edgar Harburg and Harold Arlen, including the Oscar-winning “Over the Rainbow,” the #1 tune on AFI’s list of 100 cinematic songs, though I always enjoy the rhythmic laughter of “The Merry Old Land of Oz” as well.

All combined, this greatest adaptation of L. Frank Baum’s book is still the cinematic delight it was upon its release decades ago. Its classic status relies heavily on nostalgia, for The Wizard of Oz easily conjures the wonder, fear, and excitement that my family had when we each first saw it. It deserves to be one of the first films of childhood, so that adults can reminisce while the kids are introduced to the marvelous land of Oz.

Best line (none of the obvious): (Dorothy) “How can you talk if you haven’t got a brain?”  (Scarecrow) “I don’t know, but some people without brains do an awful lot of talking, don’t they?”

VC’s best line:  (Dorothy) “There’s no place like home!”

 
Rank: 60 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

282 Followers and Counting

#22: Heart and Souls (1993)

14 Wednesday Jan 2015

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A waitress, a singer, a thief, and a mother
Get onto a bus but don’t know one another.
That changes tonight when a bus accident
Deprives them of life, leaving no one content.
 
Remaining as ghosts, they are tied to a boy,
Newborn Thomas Reilly, their pride and their joy.
Yet as he grows up, his invisible friends
Perceive that their presence is starting bad trends.
 
They vanish from view, and through maddening years,
They wait in his shadow, where none interferes…
Until a bus driver arrives for the souls,
Explaining they should have all settled their goals.
 
Their unfinished business now has urgency,
And Thomas has no choice but help with their plea.
Meanwhile, relationship troubles persist,
Especially with all the ghosts in their midst.
 
A wrong now made right and a brave second chance,
A sudden reunion and broken romance
Fulfill everyone as the souls each depart
And Thomas decides to be true to his heart.
__________________
 

Have you ever gotten on a bus with a bunch of total strangers? Have you ever wondered what it would be like to spend eternity getting to know them, whether you liked it or not? I first saw Heart and Souls as a kid, enjoyed it tremendously, and then promptly forgot about it for some years. When I rewatched it more recently, I was surprised to find it just as funny and touching as I remembered it.

This was my first introduction to several famous actors, particularly Robert Downey, Jr. as Thomas Reilly. Though his career quickly went downhill in the subsequent years (before his triumphant comeback), Heart and Souls came right after his Oscar-nominated role in Chaplin and utilizes some of the slapstick talent he displayed in that film. His acting chops are obvious, as his character is forced to do impressions of his invisible companions when they take over his body, with hilarious results. All the other actors are in top form, including Elizabeth Shue as Thomas’s girlfriend Anne, Charles Grodin as timid would-be opera singer Harrison, Kyra Sedgwick as vacillating lover Julia, Alfre Woodard as devoted mother Penny, and Tom Sizemore as lecherous burglar Milo. Their interaction with each other is just one of the film’s strengths, since spending decades within ten feet of the same people would understandably wear on the nerves while also building unexpected friendships. Their relationship with Thomas is sweet throughout, whether entertaining him with “Walk Like a Man” as a child (played by Eric Lloyd, or Charlie from The Santa Clause) or berating his jerkish tendencies as an adult.

Though the transcendent impetus for their unfinished business may imply reincarnation or guardian angel fallacies, the film is not concerned with religion but rather with the ghosts’ unfinished lives. Each of them has something that would fulfill them, whether it’s realizing a dream or learning of those they left behind, and as each ambition is achieved, there’s a satisfying sense of accomplishment worthy of a triumphant cheer or a wiped-away tear. Heart and Souls is a film I will always be fond of, for it touches both heart and funny bone in all the best ways.

Best line: (Thomas, when Harrison assumes he will remain a failure) “No offense, Harrison, but you died a failure because you never tried.”

 
Rank: 59 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

281 Followers and Counting

#23: Pirates of the Caribbean (2003, 2006, 2007)

13 Tuesday Jan 2015

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(Spoilers ahoy!)
 
Elizabeth Swann was a girl when there came
A boy from the ocean, Will Turner by name.
She feared him a pirate and took a gold coin
And hid it for years to protect him from shame.
When both are now grown with a love they won’t share,
The Commodore Norrington tries to declare
An offer of marriage she’s not quick to join,
Till Captain Jack Sparrow arrives debonair.
 
Locked up for his crimes, he’s surprised at the sight
Of his former ship, the Black Pearl, in the night.
Attracted by gold, the fiends capture Miss Swann,
Who lies to convince them to shove off forthright.
The Captain Barbossa abducts the lass too,
Revealing the curse on himself and his crew.
As they sail away, Will is adamant on
Releasing Jack Sparrow to hotly pursue.
 
Collecting a crew in Tortuga, Jack sails
For Isla de Muerta, where lies and betrayals
Come out and succeed in imprisoning Will,
While Jack and Miss Swann are marooned by details.
With Norrington’s aid, they return to save Will,
And swordfights galore offer many a thrill.
Barbossa is slain, and true love they fulfill,
While Jack takes the Black Pearl to roam the seas still.
_______________
 
When Lord Cutler Beckett, for whom business reigns,
Desires Jack’s compass, he goes to great pains,
Convincing first Will, then Elizabeth too,
To find Jack or else be committed to chains.
While Jack’s being Jack, he is shocked at a guest,
Old Bootstrap Bill Turner, Will’s father oppressed,
Who says Jack must pay up the debt that is due;
For now Davy Jones wants his soul on request.
 
Jack flees to an island, which Will also finds,
Where cannibals threaten with changeable minds.
Escaping the danger, they take a detour,
And witch Tia Dalma lends help of all kinds.
Jack haggles with Jones for the sake of his soul
And buys three more days at a difficult toll.
Tortuga yields souls, since they needn’t be pure,
While Will gives his father a promise and goal.
 
Jack finds Norrington and Elizabeth Swann,
Both desperate but willing to quickly move on,
For Jones’s live heart beats within a locked chest,
And he who should find it could make him a pawn.
The chest is discovered, but fighting begins
‘Twixt Norrington, Jack, and Will, none of whom wins.
As Jones’s own crew arrives at his behest,
The heart’s snatched to make up for Norrington’s sins.
 
As Jack tries to run, Jones awakens his pet,
The Kraken, to finally settle the debt.
His crew fleeing, Jack has no choice but to stay;
His unwilling sacrifice might end the threat.
With Jack and the Black Pearl devoured away,
The heart is Lord Beckett’s, to Jones’s dismay.
A plan to bring Jack back is soon underway,
With help from an old foe, whom death could not stay.
_________________
 
As Beckett is wiping out all buccaneers,
Assisted by Jones and his heart-involved fears,
Barbossa and friends are in far Singapore
In search of a map to the final frontiers.
With help from Sao Feng, one of nine pirate lords,
They head for the edge, after drawing their swords.
In Davy Jones’ Locker, they find Jack ashore,
Where he is kept company by crabby hordes.
 
So, one green flash later, there’re lies and betrayal
With Sao Feng and Beckett and all who set sail.
They learn that Calypso was Davy Jones’ lover,
A sea god imprisoned with flesh as her jail;
Barbossa will free her to aid in their plight.
Elizabeth’s made pirate lord in the night.
To Shipwreck Cove, all of the pirates take cover,
Debating on whether to lie low or fight.
 
Elizabeth’s named as the new Pirate King,
Deciding their one hope is swashbuckling.
They set free Calypso, who’s in a bad mood,
For Jones once betrayed her, a deep-seated sting.
The Pearl and the Dutchman engage in a storm,
A gift from Calypso, now back in true form.
Jack goes for the heart, that the fight may conclude,
Though he who kills Jones must his duties perform.
 
The maelstrom keeps raging amid the bloodshed.
While fighting, both Will and Elizabeth wed.
Though Jack had intended to finish the heart,
Another has more need for Davy Jones dead.
The tables are turned as the cannons restart,
And Lord Cutler Beckett’s own plans fall apart.
While true love endures, Sparrow’s shipmates depart,
But Jack’s well-prepared for a new course to chart.
____________________
 

With all the uninspired movies reading “based on a video game,” who could have foreseen that a series of swashbuckling greatness could be derived from a theme park ride? Pirates of the Caribbean was certainly a surprise when The Curse of the Black Pearl came out over a decade ago, but subsequent viewings have only raised my opinion of this action-packed, often convoluted franchise. Don’t bother with On Stranger Tides, though; it’s just not the same.

The Curse of the Black Pearl is the one that started it all, one of the few modern films to effectively introduce an instantly iconic character, Captain Jack Sparrow. Johnny Depp has always been drawn to the weird and eccentric, and his career has fluctuated wildly because of it; but here he hit his ideal stride and earned a Best Actor nomination for it. Sparrow is dashing, cunning, a bit creepy and disgusting, yet strangely alluring in a grimy sort of way, usually one step ahead of the rest, full of comic bravado and a latent good heart. He steals every scene while complementing all the other actors, like Orlando Bloom’s Will Turner and Keira Knightley’s Elizabeth Swann, semi-iconic characters in their own right. Their love story has its predictable ups and downs but also possesses that epic romantic quality that eludes many other films. A good villain always improves a film, and Geoffrey Rush is one heck of a pirate. His sneering negotiations and ruthlessness make him a memorable antagonist, and the creepy but incredible skeleton curse just augments the menace of him and his crew. Add in some powdered wigs, wondrous sword fights, clever dialogue, Oscar-nominated special effects, and one of the greatest scores of all time by Klaus Badelt (seriously, no other score captures and enhances the spirit of the film itself as this rip-roaring soundtrack, taken over by Hans Zimmer for the sequels), and Disney had a winner on their hands.

I don’t know how the filmmakers did it, but Dead Man’s Chest ups the ante in every way and remains the only Pirates film to win an Oscar, for Best Visual Effects. It introduces yet another historic villain in the form of Bill Nighy’s squid-faced Davy Jones and, to a lesser extent, Tom Hollander’s Godfather-like Lord Cutler Beckett with his obsession with “business.” This second film is the king of set pieces, varied, outlandish, and absolutely awesome! From the swinging cages on Pelegosto to the Kraken’s attacks to the astonishing three-way water-wheel duel, Dead Man’s Chest is replete with some of the best action sequences I’ve seen. As pure entertainment, it’s a twisting, crowd-pleasing thrill ride with a jaw-dropping surprise ending that left everyone in the theater clamoring for more.

When they finally got more, some may not have been entirely satisfied. Shot back-to-back with its predecessor, At World’s End has much of what made the first two great (the characterizations, breathtaking action on an even larger scale) but mixed with an unfortunate bloatedness. Even after several viewings, the film can seem like an overstuffed mess, with loads of conflicting motivations, changing allegiances, mythic plot devices, and ship-hopping. It all evens out by the finale, but the middle of the film is unnecessarily confusing. Plus, Jack’s eccentricities are morphed into full-fledged bizarreness, with strange visions of the afterlife adding nothing to the plot and scenes of multiple Jack Sparrows thrown in seemingly just for the sake of spending the film’s colossal budget. In addition, the expansion of Tia Dalma’s role brought out the fact that her Jamaican accent is incomprehensible at times; as with Yoda in The Empire Strikes Back, my VC couldn’t understand her the first time out. All that being said, ongoing viewings have increased my overall opinion of the film, including its bittersweet ending. The most impressive scene is easily the long final battle amidst a raging whirlpool that would put Charybdis to shame. As a stand-alone film, At World’s End is rather weak, but as an epic conclusion to the trilogy, it’s better than it seemed at first.

Though Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales is being shot now for a 2017 release, I doubt that Jerry Bruckheimer’s lightning will strike again, as it did with the original films, especially the first and second. Rarely have action, characters, music, and romance been combined into such an entertaining package. This year’s Tomorrowland seems to be Disney’s next shot at adapting one of their attractions, but it’s unlikely to compare to one of Disney’s most surprisingly successful franchises.

Best line from The Curse of the Black Pearl: (Captain Barbossa) “You best start believing in ghost stories, Miss Turner.  You’re in one!”

Best line from Dead Man’s Chest: (Elizabeth) “There will come a time when you have a chance to do the right thing.”  (Jack) “I love those moments. I like to wave at them as they pass by.”

Best line from At World’s End: (Barbossa) “Aye… we’re good and lost now.”   (Elizabeth) “Lost?”   (Barbossa) “For sure, you have to be lost to find a place that can’t be found, elseways everyone would know where it was.”

 
Rank: 59 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

281 Followers and Counting

#29: The Chronicles of Narnia (2005, 2008, 2010)

05 Monday Jan 2015

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In World War II, the Pevensies
Are sent away with great unease.
Professor Kirke accepts them in,
To all four children’s sad chagrin.
 
When Lucy sights a wardrobe there,
She finds a magic portal rare.
A snowy wood and friendly faun
Await; to Narnia she’s gone.
 
Soon Edmund follows through, and then
The White Witch bids him come again.
When Susan enters too with Peter,
Narnia grows warm and sweeter.
 
Aslan has returned to mend;
The Witch’s reign is at an end.
Yet Edmund shocks them with betrayal,
And only death can death curtail.
 
The lion takes the traitor’s place
And dies in torment and disgrace.
Yet as the Witch’s triumph nears,
In greater strength Aslan appears.
 
The battle won, the White Witch slain,
The Pevensies are crowned and reign.
Their time within the wardrobe passed,
Their visit ends, but not their last.
_________________
 
In Narnia, for centuries,
The Telmarines have reigned with ease;
As King Miraz welcomes a son,
Prince Caspian is forced to run.
 
He calls to Narnia once more
The four great kings and queens of yore.
The Pevensies are shocked to find
How swifter time has been unkind.
 
As Caspian becomes allied
With native Narnians who hide,
The Pevensies arrive to aid
The rightful Prince with his crusade.
 
They fail with their preemptive raid,
Replacing Aslan with the blade.
Yet as the Telmarines attack,
The Narnians can’t hold them back.
 
Miraz and Peter hold a duel,
To thus decide who ought to rule.
When battle breaks out nonetheless,
Aslan assists in their distress.
 
With Caspian upon the throne,
Some Telmarines seek lands unknown.
The Pevensies must leave as well,
With more adventures now to tell.
___________________
 
When both Edmund and Lucy must
Go off to stay, to their disgust,
With haughty cousin Eustace Scrubb,
They grow to hate each slight and snub.
 
A sailing picture in their room
Begins to gush with ocean spume,
And they find Caspian, increased;
His Dawn Treader is sailing east.
 
They seek the special magic swords
Of seven former banished lords
To halt a threatening green mist
That no one knows how to resist.
 
As island dangers come and go,
The crew face risk and would-be foe,
From slavers to a golden thirst,
Temptations and a treasure cursed.
 
They reach the island of a star;
The final sword is none too far.
The mist lurks in an island dark,
Where nightmares terrorize their bark.
 
When Aslan peels the curse away,
The swords unite to end the fray.
Near Aslan’s land, upon the shores,
The children close the last of doors.
________________
 

I was introduced to C. S. Lewis’s Chronicles of Narnia rather late, not long before the first film came out ten years ago, but I immediately gobbled up the series and became a lifelong admirer of his literary achievement. Some fans of his work were left unsatisfied with the film adaptations, but I have always enjoyed them; even when they depart from the books, they retain the enchantment of Narnia and sometimes even improve on the source material, if only dramatically.

The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe is certainly the closest to the book, and much of its success hinged on the outstanding casting of the four Pevensie children. William Moseley as Peter, Anna Popplewell as Susan, Skandar Keynes as Edmund, and Georgie Henley as Lucy are all marvelous, especially Henley, the youngest and cutest of the child actors. Their wide-eyed awe at the world upon which they stumble captures the same wonder of discovery in the book, which the audience can more easily share with a visual wintry landscape. The music enhances the effect of astonishment and epic excitement, and though the special effects are a little inconsistent, they are much more diverse and imaginative than most fantasy films, especially during the battle scenes, and the film won the Best Makeup Oscar. Of course, the best character is the great lion Aslan, voiced magnificently by Liam Neeson, and though critics can nitpick over details in dialogue, his Christological qualities are powerfully portrayed in Aslan’s sacrifice for Edmund and ultimate defeat of evil. My VC and I are often touched deeply by the Stone Table scene. With live-action and vocal performances from other skilled actors like Jim Broadbent, Tilda Swinton, Ray Winstone, and a young James McAvoy as Mr. Tumnus, the entire film is magical and certainly worthy of Lewis’s novel. Finally, while all three films have songs worthy of my End Credits Song Hall of Fame, the first film has one of the best ever, Alanis Morissette’s beautiful “Wunderkind.”

Prince Caspian was a return to form for all involved but with a darker tone that left some viewers uncomfortable, as well as more supplementary content that angered the occasional devoted fan. I, for one, enjoy Prince Caspian more than the first film and even more than the book, which was comparatively less exciting. It possesses a better script and does feel more mature, for the characters themselves acknowledge how Narnia has become wilder and more dangerous from centuries of oppression. Again, one of its greatest strengths lies in its cast, including all the Pevensies and relative newcomer Ben Barnes in the title role. Plus, there’s a pre-Game of Thrones Peter Dinklage as Trumpkin, Warwick Davis as Nikabrik, Ken Stott (Balin from The Hobbit films) as Trufflehunter the badger, Eddie Izzard as a surprisingly well-realized Reepicheep, and a number of excellent Italian actors as the Telmarines, not least of which being Sergio Castellitto as King Miraz, who offers a different kind of menace than the White Witch. The film transforms the book’s brief mention of a failed attack into a fantastic castle invasion that may seem like filler but heightens the action and the tensions of all involved. Likewise, the proposal about resurrecting the White Witch is actually depicted, allowing Edmund a further chance to redeem himself. The book’s description of Peter and Miraz’s duel could have failed in the film adaptation but is brought to life with some marvelous camera work. By the time of the big battle, made more epic by the arrival of living trees, all the characters have come into their own, and the subsequent farewell is genuinely poignant. As someone who has not read the books, my VC was not bothered by the films’ additions and became deeply attached to the characters, being especially affected by the Pevensies’ bittersweet departure from Narnia.

The Voyage of the Dawn Treader almost didn’t happen, since Disney pulled out their involvement and 20th Century Fox and new director Michael Apted took over production. I’m glad it was made, but honestly it doesn’t quite compare with the previous two. At least Edmund, Lucy, Caspian, and Neeson’s Aslan return, but otherwise there’s a disconnect from its prequels. Simon Pegg is good but just different as the new voice of Reepicheep, and the special effects have a disparate and not always better appearance. Dawn Treader has always been my favorite of the books due to its episodic odyssey of a plot, but I see why changes were necessary for it to work as a film. Most of the islands are well-visualized, especially the island of the ridiculous Dufflepuds, but some of the happenings feel rushed. Even so, the need for a villain is well-placed in the Dark Island and the sea serpent from the book, and the finale is fittingly action-packed. I will say that Will Poulter is an excellent Eustace, properly insufferable at first and believably repentant by the end. The film does have moments of brilliance, particularly the final goodbye for Lucy and Edmund, which is even more sorrowful than in Prince Caspian, and thankfully includes one of the most obvious Christian hints from the book, Aslan’s other name.

The final scenes of Dawn Treader are quiet and emotional and might very well be the last we see of this incarnation of Narnia. The Silver Chair is supposedly on its way, but if they don’t hurry, Will Poulter will be too old and one of the few connections to the previous films will be lost by recasting Eustace. If it ever does happen, it will surely be even more different than Dawn Treader was. It amazes and angers me that the Harry Potter and Twilight series can get a movie made for each book, plus one, but the ultra-popular Narnia books are somehow being put on indefinite hold. I don’t know if this is because of its Christian roots and the difficulty of pleasing both secular and religious audiences, but it’s shameful. I can understand why coldly received fantasy adaptations like Inkheart, Eragon, and The Seeker never earned a sequel, but all three Narnia films were highly successful financially. Narnia deserves better.

Best line from The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe: (Susan) “It’s our sister, sir. Lucy.”
(Professor Kirke) “The weeping girl?”
(Susan) “Yes, sir. She’s upset.”
(Professor Kirke) “Hence the weeping.”
 
Best line from Prince Caspian: (Peter, while traveling) “That’s the trouble with girls. You can’t carry a map in your heads.”
(Lucy) “That’s because our heads have something in them.”
 
Best line from The Voyage of the Dawn Treader: (Lucy) “Will you come and visit us in our world?”
(Aslan) “I shall be watching you always.”
(Lucy) “How?”
(Aslan) “In your world, I have another name. You must learn to know me by it. That was the very reason why you were brought to Narnia, that by knowing me here for a little, you may know me better there.”
 
 
Rank: 58 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

276 Followers and Counting

#30: The Family Man (2000)

04 Sunday Jan 2015

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Remember, Kate, when we were at the airport years ago?
How stupidly I left you for what job and wealth could bring?
I grew to be a true success, a businessman, a pro,
And never would have thought that I was missing anything.
 
But then a glimpse was given me, and much to my chagrin,
I found my happy, wealthy life replaced with kids and you.
I saw ourselves together, as what would or might have been,
But hated the suburban life I barely never knew.
 
Yet as I started seeing past the lack of cash and clout,
I saw the truer joys that I had not perceived before.
I wasn’t getting anywhere with how I’d whine and pout,
So I embraced this other life, despite my being poor.
 
Although I tried improving it, the truth I didn’t see
Is we indeed were happy in our own suburban way.
That’s when the precious, fleeting glimpse was taken back from me,
And left me now regretful of that dim departing day.
 
Please reconsider life and love and all that we could be;
Don’t make the same mistake I did; but hear, believe, and stay.
____________________
 

Sorry for the week-long hiatus. A family hospitalization called me away, but I’m back to finish the list!

My family received The Family Man on DVD as an unwanted gift, and it was some time before we finally got around to seeing it. I’m glad we did. Whereas It’s a Wonderful Life presented a terrible alternate reality to encourage George Bailey, The Family Man hinges on another “what if” situation that causes Jack Campbell to realize the importance of marriage and family.

Nicolas Cage is at his best playing Jack as both confident businessman and sullen dad/husband, and most of the humor comes from his reactions to the sudden change forced upon him. Likewise, Tea Leoni is perfect as his could-be wife Kate; her performance spans the expansive range of spousal emotions, from insistent anger to glum disappointment, all surpassed by a familial give-and-take warmth. Don Cheadle also has a low-key role as “Cash Money,” the unexplained angel(?)/representative that gives Jack the glimpse. Also, (Lost alert) the Chinese guy in the convenience store early on is Ken Leung, known to Lost fans as ghost hunter Miles Straume.

It’s amazing that a film that depicts all the headaches of married suburban life turns out to be a tribute and endorsement of such, insisting that truer happiness can be found in a kid-harassed New Jersey home rather than an expensive but lonely apartment suite. Some critics didn’t consider the film an affirmation of middle-class suburban joy, pointing to Jack’s constant dissatisfaction with his situation, even near the end. Yes, his former/real life had its delights, which he understandably misses, yet it is just as he recognizes the preferred pleasure of this “glimpse” that it is taken from him.

That’s another sticking point for some viewers: Whereas George Bailey was shown his alternate reality to cheer him about his own accomplishments and worth, “Cash Money” plucks Jack from his ignorant bliss with a glimpse he neither wanted nor seemingly needed, only to return him to a comparatively dismal life made empty by his supernatural intervention. To be honest, I see how that view could turn people off, yet Cash Money’s motivations seem benevolent (a cross in the background implies he might be angelic), and his presence is ultimately just a plot device to initiate Jack’s change. Even if Jack thought he was happy, the reemergence of Kate reopened the door he closed thirteen years prior and made a better life possible if only he would jump on the opportunity; the glimpse was the catalyst. Such is how I see the film, and such is how I believe it was intended to be interpreted.

(Clear spoilers in this paragraph) I would have only changed one thing, the very end. While Jack’s final plea is wonderful, not unlike Billy Crystal’s in When Harry Met Sally…, the open-ended conclusion bears wistful potential rather than complete satisfaction. There was a 2010 remake with Kevin Sorbo and John Ratzenberger entitled What If…, which strengthened the Christian resonances in the story but was clearly borrowed material. The one improved point was the final scene, in which a home video the main character had seen earlier was recreated, indicating that the life and children he glimpsed did indeed become reality. Such a scene may have been overly clear for a sometimes ambiguous film like The Family Man, but it would have been more satisfying.

Excellent modern Christmas fare, The Family Man is also the best film from director Brett Ratner (whom I have never forgiven for ruining X-Men: The Last Stand, which coincidentally also featured Ken Leung). The Family Man is a celebration of the fulfillment found in family, and a bittersweet reminder of what could be lost down the path not taken.

Best line: (Jack, at the end) “I don’t know, maybe it was just all a dream. Maybe I went to bed one lonely night in December, and I imagined it all. But I swear, nothing has ever felt more real. And if you get on that plane right now, it’ll disappear forever. I know we could both go on with our lives and we’d both be fine, but I’ve seen what we could be like together. And I choose us.”

 
Rank: 58 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

275 Followers and Counting

#31: The Mummy (1999) and The Mummy Returns (2001)

26 Friday Dec 2014

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Many centuries ago, upon the hot Egyptian sands,
Imhotep betrayed his pharaoh, who was murdered at his hands.
He and love Anck-su-Namun suffered death for what they did,
And the priest was mummified and cursed and vigilantly hid.
 
1926 or so is when a brave librarian,
Evelyn, with Jonathan, her brother, come to carry in
A map of sorts to Rick O’Connell, who discovered it and knows
Where the fabled treasure city Hamunaptra once arose.
 
Leading them, the dashing rogue encounters Beni, once a friend,
Who is leading treasure seekers to the city and their end.
Medjai warriors attempt to stop the bold adventurers,
Who discover Imhotep and resurrect this worst of curs.
 
As the mummy desiccates the bodies of a chosen few,
He then kidnaps Evelyn, his former lover to renew.
Rick and Jonathan, as well as Medjai leader Ardeth Bay,
Follow back to Hamunaptra, where a book can save the day.
 
Evelyn is very nearly sacrificed by Imhotep,
Till Rick fights while Jonathan is reading symbols step by step.
When the mummy is defeated and the just desserts are served,
Evelyn and Rick O’Connell leave in triumph well-deserved.
________________
 
Evelyn and Rick O’Connell, married now and with a son,
Take along the spunky Alex to dark crypts for family fun.
They unearth a golden bracelet, and when Alex tries it on,
He sees visions meant to guide him ere a coming lethal dawn.
 
He must head for an oasis, where the Scorpion King now lies,
Who will waken for destruction if not handed his demise.
Imhotep is resurrected by a cult with dark intentions,
Which includes his reincarnate lover and her interventions.
 
When the cult starts kidnapping, it’s clear that Imhotep intends
To defeat the Scorpion King and take his army for his ends.
Alex is abducted soon and guides them all to the oasis,
The O’Connells following upon a blimp to distant places.
 
Pygmies cause them further trouble as the deadly dawn arrives,
And as Imhotep approaches, not quite everyone survives.
When the Scorpion King awakens, he is mighty (like a Rock),
And his wicked jackal army causes Ardeth Bay a shock.
 
Rick and Imhotep face off against the evil hybrid king,
And at last when he is vanquished, everything starts crumbling.
Danger proves the truer romance, and as the O’Connells flee,
Wealth and global preservation lend them happy victory.
___________________
 

Critical reception for The Mummy and its sequel may not have been universally positive, but I consider both films quintessential actioners, with dashing characters and awesome set pieces recalling the excitement of Indiana Jones. I’m not much for horror comedies, mainly because the horror often manifests as gore, but the genre can be quite entertaining when the focus is on the comedy (Ghostbusters) or on the action, as in The Mummy.

My VC and I have always loved Brendan Fraser; he has the perfect adventure hero charisma for these movies, including that making-things-up-as-he-goes element that made Harrison Ford so likable. Pair him with Rachel Weisz as Evelyn, looking as beautiful as any actress ever has, and a modern classic romance is born. John Hannah is excellent comic relief as Evie’s con man brother Jonathan, and even if he’s CGI much of the time, Arnold Vosloo is effectively frightening as the reanimated mummy Imhotep. Ardeth Bay (which was the name taken by Imhotep in the original 1932 The Mummy) is played by Oded Fehr, whom my VC has always found dark, handsome, and hunky, even with the face tattoos.

As for the second film, despite changing directors, all the same actors returned, supplemented by Freddie Boath as Alex, who is not the most annoying of child actors and serves as a plucky addition to the O’Connell family. Oh, yeah, the Rock (a.k.a. Dwayne Johnson) had his big film debut as the Scorpion King, but considering he never speaks anything in English and is basically just a CGI tough guy most of the time, there’s not much I can say for his “performance.” Also, (Lost alert) Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje, who played Mr. Eko on my favorite show, plays a much less sympathetic killer as the villain Lock-Nah.

I was not impressed by Boris Karloff’s original The Mummy, hailed as a classic horror film yet exceptionally boring, at least to me. Retooling the basic plot points into a shoot-‘em-up pulp adventure was an inspired idea, complete with booby traps, ancient curses, killer beetles, and some then-advanced CGI. The first film is more foreboding in its build-up to the mummy’s resurrection, while the second veers into occasionally cartoonish territory, like racing sunrises and Alex’s childish high jinks. Even so, I think I like the second a little better, thanks to some outstanding action scenes, especially an awesome chase scene with a double-decker bus and the pyramid finale. I also liked how, aside from a few gruesome scenes, objectionable content was kept to a minimum, making both films the kind of Saturday night fare a family can enjoy, provided the kids’ eyes are covered every now and then. There’s some talk of reincarnation, and I don’t know how or why a mummy can recreate the plagues of Egypt, which came from God, but none of the spiritual mumbo jumbo is to be taken seriously anyway.

Neither film is Oscar material, but both are so spectacularly entertaining that Imhotep’s stereotypical romance and some unrealistic moments are easily forgiven. Such is not always the case: The third film The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, thanks mainly to the loss of chemistry from the recasting of Rachel Weisz, just didn’t have the same magic, nor did director Stephen Sommers’ other monster movie rehash Van Helsing. With these films, it’s the full package that makes them something special: the thrilling score by Jerry Goldsmith (The Mummy) and Alan Silvestri (The Mummy Returns), funny and dynamic performances from most of the cast, and the perfect blend of humor, horror, and action.

Best line from The Mummy: (Evelyn) “You were actually at Hamunaptra?”
(Rick) “Yeah, I was there.”
(Evelyn) “You swear?”
(Rick) “Every damn day.”
 
Best line from The Mummy Returns: (Ardeth Bay, concerning Alex’s putting on the Bracelet of Anubis) “By putting this on, you have started a chain reaction that could bring about the next apocalypse.”
[Alex gasps]
(Rick, to Ardeth) “You, lighten up.” (to Alex) “You, big trouble.” (to Jonathan) “You, get in the car.”
 
 
Rank: 58 out of 60
 

© 2014 S. G. Liput

275 Followers and Counting