Category Archives: Reviews

#2: Mr. Holland’s Opus (1995)

13 Friday Feb 2015

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Teacher of mine, do you doubt your own worth?
Are all of your years in your mind but a waste?
Passion in school is too rare to unearth
For you to consider your talent misplaced.
 
You started halfhearted, not giving your all,
Just placing the facts and the music before us,
But you adapted and heeded the call
And played to our interests to rouse and not bore us.
 
Class after class entered your music room,
Your hall venerating the eminent notes;
Students found counsel and guidance to bloom
And glee from the time a musician devotes.
 
Somehow you managed a family to raise,
Demanding, but higher for all of the lows.
Even to this day your influence stays,
As noble and grand as the works you compose.
 
Music meant more after your music class,
In ways at the time you and I could not guess.
Now hear your great masterpiece come to pass,
Listen to woodwinds, percussion, and brass,
And know that your impact is what they profess.
Mr. Holland, you are a success.
____________________
 

I doubt many people would share my #2 film. It didn’t generate much Oscar buzz, aside from a well-deserved Best Actor nomination for Richard Dreyfuss. It’s not The Godfather or Citizen Kane or Schindler’s List, but what it lacks in stylish camerawork or innovative storytelling, it makes up for in passion and the elevation of unsung heroes. In many cases, the film was my first introduction to certain music, like Beethoven and John Lennon, and it serves as a testament to the power and purpose of the arts in our lives.

Once again, Mr. Holland’s Opus, which is not about a comic strip penguin, is a “meet-‘em-and-move-on” film, but instead of the title teacher “moving on,” he stays put as decades of students pass under his tutelage. In many ways, it’s a combination of my previous two movies. Like Forrest Gump, it follows the triumphs and heartaches of one man through the 1960s, 70s, and beyond, employing archive footage and a well-chosen period soundtrack. Like It’s a Wonderful Life, it features a man whose restricting job comes before his preferred vocation and who, by the end, feels like a failure until an overwhelmingly supportive display of appreciation from his friends. As a fusion of these two stories and a familiar “good teacher” narrative, it becomes a musical journey of the most satisfying kind.

Richard Dreyfuss gives the best performance of his career as Glenn Holland, a composer dreaming of greatness until life gets in the way. He reminds us that teachers are humans like all of us; he deals with the difficulty of starting a marching band, the excitement of childbirth, the disappointment at learning his son is deaf, the unconscious distancing of said son due to said disappointment, and the constant struggle to keep people invested in the arts. Glenne Headley is lovely as his supportive wife Iris, who also feels the strain of having a handicapped child. Olympia Dukakis as Principal Jacobs, W. H. Macy as Vice Principal Wolters, and Jay Thomas as football coach and amateur dancer Bill Meister also give memorable performances, as well as Terrence Howard in his first significant film role as drum-wielding pupil Lou Russ.

The film is full of moments worthy of an admiring sigh. The subplot involving Mr. Holland’s temptation to run off with an aspiring young singer could have gone horribly wrong, yet the film eschews Hollywood risk-taking in favor of marital fidelity. Mr. Holland knows it’s no sin to be tempted but refuses to yield to unrealistic romantic notions. Likewise, his relationship with his deaf son is brilliantly grown over time. His bond with Cole remains undeveloped for the most part, taking a back seat to Glenn’s school and musical endeavors, until Cole himself snaps his father out of his tunnel vision, convincing him that a lack of hearing need not mean a lack of music. This builds to a rare instance of Richard Dreyfuss singing, in a heartfelt concert that makes parents hold their kids a little closer. John Lennon would be proud.

It’s a Wonderful Life always gets my dad wiping his eyes at key scenes, and I’ve told him that Mr. Holland’s Opus is my It’s a Wonderful Life. The ending, featuring Michael Kamen’s glorious “An American Symphony,” inevitably causes a profound joy and satisfaction to well up inside of me, with or without tears. As “meet-‘em-and-move-on” films go, this and The Five People You Meet in Heaven have the best reunion endings, the kind that acts as the culmination of a lifetime, as well as the film.

One more reason to love Mr. Holland’s Opus is that, except for two or three words, it is completely clean, making it a poignant music lesson for the entire family. Perhaps that’s why it didn’t receive more award attention, but I definitely think it deserved further accolades than one Oscar nomination. Even if no one else ranks it as high as I do, Mr. Holland’s Opus is definitely worthy of my #2 spot.

Best line (which sums up this “meet-‘em-and-move-on”): (adult Gertrude Lang) “Look around you. There is not a life in this room that you have not touched, and each one of us is a better person because of you. We are your symphony, Mr. Holland. We are the melodies and the notes of your opus, and we are the music of your life.”

 
Rank: 60 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

285 Followers and Counting

#3: Forrest Gump (1994)

10 Tuesday Feb 2015

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His name is Forrest, Forrest Gump,
And he has quite a tale to tell,
A decade-spanning epic life
That no one else could tell as well.
 
Although he never has been smart,
His mother told him from his youth
That he could still do anything,
Which he took as God’s honest truth.
 
He didn’t have too many friends,
Just lovely Jenny by his side.
He loved her dearly from the start,
But college kept her occupied.
 
Their paths diverged as Forrest Gump
Enlisted in the Army corps
And told his girl he soon would go
To Vietnam to fight a war.
 
His heroism rescued lives,
Including his Lieutenant Dan.
As Forrest met with Ping-Pong fame,
His friend was left as half a man.
 
When Army life was done with him,
Gump bought himself a shrimping boat
To celebrate a fallen friend
Whose life to shrimp he would devote.
 
Assisted by Lieutenant Dan,
He built himself a shrimp empire,
But a loss returned him home
To Alabama to retire.
 
Beloved Jenny’s wayward path
Of drugs, abuse, and love thought free
At last brings her to Forrest’s house
To milk his hospitality.
 
A lengthy run across the land
Brings fame to Forrest once again,
But what more strongly speeds his step
Is Jenny’s now inviting pen.
 
Though soon he loses one he loves,
He gains another suddenly,
For Forrest Gump is talented
At drifting to his destiny.
________________
 

While not the first, Robert Zemeckis’s Forrest Gump is the greatest example of the “meet-‘em-and-move-on” film, following one character throughout his life as he touches and is touched by countless others, often in ways he doesn’t even comprehend. In this case, it’s set against the backdrop of late 20th-century America, and even if Forrest doesn’t fathom the influence of his adventures, we the audience do, laughing, crying, and remembering along the way.

Tom Hanks most definitely deserved his Best Actor Academy Award for his simple yet profound portrayal of Forrest, Forrest Gump. Rather than being some caricature of the mentally handicapped, his folksy candor creates a memorable paragon of innocent observation. His unbiased impressions of some painfully turbulent years in US history act as a neutral lens through which we can view events like the Vietnam War, the Watergate scandal, and the hippie movement without any potentially alienating political opinions. They just were, and Forrest was there. It’s a simple idea, but much care and effort were made in pulling it off successfully. The Oscar-winning effects team placed Forrest into archive footage, allowing him to seamlessly interact with Presidents and celebrities. Yet through all of his adventures, he remains the same lovable mama’s boy, harboring (as the writer Eric Roth has stated) an unshakeable faith in only three things: God, his wise mother (Sally Field), and his sweetheart Jenny (Robin Wright). It’s funny, though, that Field plays Hanks’s mother here when she played his love interest in Punchline just six years earlier.

Jenny chooses the opposite approach of Forrest’s clean-cut journey through the decades. Whereas his homespun values preserve Forrest unsullied for the most part, in the world but not of the world, Jenny embraces the sex, drugs, and destructive lifestyle that captured so many in the 1960s, all the while keeping her would-be suitor at a distance. Her “spoiled goods” mentality is frustrating because of her own foolish choices, and tragic because of Forrest’s unrequited love for her, at least until the end. Forrest Gump is a prime example of how an opinion can make a 360 over time; my VC disliked the film’s ending at first, mainly due to how Jenny used Forrest’s affection for her to sneak a one-night stand and then did not contact him again until she was dying. Over time, she’s come to love the film as much as I do and to recognize more authenticity in Jenny’s deathbed declaration of love. As disheartening as their degrading lifestyles became, the eventual turnaround for Jenny and for Lieutenant Dan (a fantastic Gary Sinise) is what provides the satisfying, tear-worthy conclusion that “meet-‘em-and-move-on” films do so well. (By the way, did anyone else notice that Jenny’s abusive boyfriend in Washington, D.C., was named Wesley? Robin Wright must love that name.)

Despite the language and some sexual awakenings for Forrest, the film is a redemptive and unforgettable odyssey in which the good and decent are proven more prosperous than the edgy and bitter. The soundtrack is one of the best, providing pitch-perfect musical accompaniment for every decade Forrest encounters (the Doors are well represented), and the three-year running sequence features a spectacular blend of rocking road anthems and stunning cinematography. The quirky narration is one of my favorite elements, with sentences often being repeated by an actor right after they’ve been spoken. Sometimes narration is an unnecessary distraction, but for “meet-‘em-and-move-on” films, it often strengthens the effect of the story, as with Life of Pi and The Shawshank Redemption. Many people doubtless consider Shawshank a better film, which was overshadowed by the popularity of Tom Hanks’ best role in 1994, but though Shawshank is more mature in tone and subject, and I still love it, Forrest Gump holds a greater variety of incident, special effects, and storytelling and is just more appealing in general. It’s a special film that some may dismiss as glossing over history, but I find more reasons to love it on every viewing. (Did you notice that Forrest’s eyes are closed in every picture he takes? I didn’t till this latest time.)

Best line (a less obvious one):  (Bubba) “Anyway, like I was sayin’, shrimp is the fruit of the sea. You can barbecue it, boil it, broil it, bake it, sauté it. Dey’s uh, shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo. Pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried. There’s pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich. That- that’s about it.”

 
Rank: 60 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

284 Followers and Counting

#4: It’s a Wonderful Life (1946)

09 Monday Feb 2015

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George Bailey lives in Bedford Falls
But does not wish to stay.
“This crummy little town” just palls
Against lands far away.
 
His father barely keeps afloat
The ol’ Building and Loan,
Which causes George to miss his boat,
Or simply to postpone.
 
Young Mary Hatch has always had
A crush on George; the two
Soon hit it off, and Mary’s glad
That wishes do come true.
 
When George’s plans are shot once more
Because of the depression,
His business doesn’t close its door,
Through Mary’s intercession.
 
For years in little Bedford Falls,
George serves the friendly poor,
While stopping greedy Potter’s calls
To yield what George stands for.
 
But then one day, some carelessness
Misplaces needed cash,
And desperation’s stressful press
Tempts George to make a splash.
 
An angel staves off suicide,
And Clarence tries to warn
By giving George a glimpse untried
Of if he’d not been born.
 
This other world without George Bailey
Is dark and forlorn;
He sees the difference he made daily
Since he had been born.
 
He begs his life back, no more dull,
And finds to his delight
The life he sees is wonderful
And friends that aid his plight.
________________
 

My mom and I share my #1 film, but my dad’s personal favorite at least made it to my #4. My highest black-and-white film, It’s a Wonderful Life stands out as Frank Capra’s best film, sentimental in the best sense of the word, full of moments that inevitably bring my dad to tears. My mom loves it too, having first seen it after learning it was Roger Ebert’s favorite film back in the 80s. Though not successful upon release, it has grown in esteem over the years to become one of those perennial Christmas traditions, a reminder of all that can be good in this world.

In addition to a splendid screenplay, the casting is excellent. Jimmy Stewart is the ideal everyman, whether as a decent Joe Schmo in a world of dirty politics or a selfless son/brother/husband/father that changes his town in ways he never could have imagined. Here his acting talent is at its most diverse, evoking a wide range of deeply felt emotions, from disappointment to helpless despair to rebounding joy that tugs effortlessly on every viewer’s heartstrings. Other examples of exceptional casting include a glowing Donna Reed as Mary Bailey, Thomas Mitchell as forgetful Uncle Billy, child-like Henry Travers as guardian angel Clarence Odbody, and Lionel Barrymore as Mr. Potter, an utterly despicable villain in a town of otherwise pleasant folk.

Watching the film now, after so many prior viewings, it’s hard to believe that George Bailey could consider himself a failure, after saving a couple of lives and personally presiding over happy homecomings (most people don’t even do that). Yet the microscope of anxiety leads him to cruel panic, and a series of hardships, one after the other, plausibly drives him to consider suicide. While the film implies that guardian angels are deceased humans (which isn’t true), the intervention of Clarence is more charming and divinely sent than, say, the ghosts in A Christmas Carol. In trying to convince George of his own worth, the film serves as encouragement for its audience. Who hasn’t felt like a failure at some point in his/her life? Who hasn’t wondered if it was all for naught? Yet, like the tapestry argument about how focusing on one thread does not comprehend the full pattern, we never know how and how often our lives touch others’. By now, the interconnection of lives has become a well-worn lesson, from Liberty Mutual commercials to countless films, but It’s a Wonderful Life does it best, giving a full sense of just how essential one man can be to the happiness of an entire town.

My VC and I had a brief debate over whether the film could be considered a “meet-‘em-and-move-on” movie. I at first thought so because of the many people with whom George interacts throughout his life and the infinitely feel-good reunion of an ending. Yet she pointed out that, even if George doesn’t fully appreciate all his friends until the end, nobody really moves on. It all takes place in the same quiet little New York town, a place George at first views as a cage but, like nostalgic viewers, eventually comes to appreciate it as his home. (By the way, the entire town of Bedford Falls was one long outdoor set.) Thus, while It’s a Wonderful Life isn’t technically a “meet-‘em-and-move-on,” it does bear certain similarities, especially by the jubilant end. (Again by the way, as wonderful as it is for everyone in town to donate to George, it probably wasn’t enough to make up for the missing $8,000; it really all came down to his friendship with wealthy Sam Wainwright. Hee-haw!)

Though his films were often derided as “Capra-corn,” Frank Capra was certainly one of the great early Hollywood directors, simply choosing to focus on the good, the charming, and the uplifting rather than the more cynical stuff some critics prefer. His personal favorite of his films, It’s a Wonderful Life exemplifies simple, feel-good messages in an entertaining package sure to break and warm the heart.

Best line: (Clarence) “Strange, isn’t it? Each man’s life touches so many other lives. When he isn’t around, he leaves an awful hole, doesn’t he?”

 
Rank: 60 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

284 Followers and Counting

#5: The Sound of Music (1965)

06 Friday Feb 2015

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(Best sung to “My Favorite Things”)
 
Austria’s hills hold a thrill for Maria;
Her fellow nuns simply have no idea
Just how to manage this angel of stress,
So she’s sent off as a new governess.
 
The children of Captain von Trapp, lucky seven,
Are quite a handful and no seventh heaven.
Though Captain formally keeps them in line,
Governesses find them less than benign.
 
Fraulein Maria is warm and kindhearted,
And soon her musical love is imparted.
Captain’s away so the children will play,
Learning to sing in the happiest way.
 
When the day ends,
Captain is mad,
But the children sing.
Reminded of music, he’s suddenly glad,
And soon they have him crooning.
 
Baroness Schraeder, whom Captain is dating,
Causes Maria to leave just by stating
That he’s in love with Maria, a fact
That brings her back in the next-to-last act.
 
After Maria and Captain are married,
Problems arise from the views he has carried.
Told by the Nazis that he’s to report,
Captain realizes that their time is short.
 
Leaving the country to keep from conforming,
They buy some time by that evening performing.
As they escape to the convent nearby,
Nazis close in to prevent their goodbye.
 
To the mountains,
The von Trapps flee
Into Switzerland.
Barely escaping, the family now free
Continue through vistas grand.
___________________
 

The musical genre is one of my favorites, presumably because I enjoy music itself so much. I love how stories can be told succinctly through song, and the music of whatever I watch typically gets stuck in my head for some time afterward. The most recent favorite I found is a 2009 musical of The Count of Monte Cristo (hasn’t been filmed yet); before that, it was Frozen; before that, the discovery of Les Miserables. Yet as fun as it is to unearth exceptional new musicals, I always return to the greatest of them all: The Sound of Music.

After her Oscar-winning performance as Mary Poppins the previous year, Julie Andrews outdid herself as beloved nun-turned-governess-turned-wife Maria. She has both the voice and the charisma to make Maria genuinely endearing even while everyone else grouses about her. I particularly liked how the life of a nun was not derided as less worthy than married life but simply not for her, a fact that the Mother Superior recognized before Maria. On the opposite end of the spectrum, Christopher Plummer found his most famous role as Captain Georg von Trapp, the icy father who just needs a headache of a governess to reawaken his love of music and his own children.

I will admit that I find many of Hollywood’s Golden Age musicals rather boring, particularly straight dramatic adaptations like West Side Story, but The Sound of Music sidesteps that concern with its classic Rodgers and Hammerstein soundtrack, peppered with much humor and delightful character moments. Whenever it threatens to drag, a well-spaced musical number livens things up, or we get a laugh from the endearingly candid Maria or the “charming sponge” Max Detweiler (Richard Haydn). By the end, “fuzzy camera” romance gives way to a nail-biting thriller finale that shouldn’t leave anyone bored.

Along the way are stunning mountain vistas and some of the finest show tunes this side of Salzburg. Nowhere are these so well-combined as in “Do-Re-Mi,” a song about singing that brims with joie de vivre and ends on an unrivalled high note that always gives my VC goosebumps. The rest of the songs are equally marvelous, with not a dud in the bunch. “My Favorite Things” is always a joy, and the puppeteered “The Lonely Goatherd” is possibly the most exuberant and fun musical number that Hollywood ever offered. Even the slower songs range from intimate to inspirational and are the kind of hummable music that effortlessly ingrains itself into the listener’s ears and heart.

My family has always enjoyed The Sound of Music. My mom was Gretl’s age when it came out, and Maria’s wedding dress and veil stuck in her mind to influence her own wedding train. She even enjoyed the recent live television version with Carrie Underwood, a production that couldn’t compare with the original in any way but was a respectable effort nonetheless. Even if the film is not historically accurate about the real von Trapp family and thus none too popular in Austria, The Sound of Music is my favorite musical and Julie Andrews’ finest hour, a feast for the ears from start to finish.

Best lines: (Captain von Trapp) “It’s the dress. You’ll have to put on another one before you meet the children.”   (Maria) “But I don’t have another one. When we entered the abbey, our worldly clothes were given to the poor.”   (Captain) “What about this one?”   (Maria) “The poor didn’t want this one.”

(“Uncle” Max) “I like rich people. I like the way they live. I like the way I live when I’m with them.”

 
Rank: 60 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

284 Followers and Counting

#6: Star Wars Trilogy (1977, 1980, 1983)

04 Wednesday Feb 2015

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(Well-known spoilers ahead)
 
In a galaxy far, far away,
The evil Empire holds sway.
As Darth Vader attacks,
Two robots make tracks
With plans, while the princess falls prey.
 
The humorous droids land unseen
On the desert world of Tatooine,
Where they are sold soon
To a boy of this dune,
Luke Skywalker, only nineteen.
 
A message on R2-D2
Sends Luke on a quick rendezvous.
Ben Kenobi tells him
Of his father’s fate grim,
Of the Jedi and lightsabers too.
 
When the Empire’s search has begun,
He and Ben and the droids have to run.
They arrange for a flight
With Han Solo, who might
Owe a crime lord a difficult sum.
 
The Millennium Falcon evades
The Empire’s fighter blockades
And heads for a sphere
That is no longer here;
The Death Star destroyed it in spades.
 
The Empire’s weapon surprises
The Falcon, which misjudges sizes.
From out of this mess,
They all save the princess,
Who helps as the group improvises.
 
Though Vader fells Ben with one blow,
The others escape even so.
The rebels afar
Plan to kill the Death Star
With a weakness, of which they now know.
 
Luke joins all the fighters’ attack
And shakes off the villain in black.
With a shot to the core,
The Death Star is no more,
And all rebels welcome them back.
_________________
 
On Hoth, Luke is met by a vision
Of Ben and is faced with decision.
On this planet of ice,
Rebels pay a dear price
As troopers attack with precision.
 
While most flee with Leia and Han,
Luke heads for where few men have gone;
A bog planet hides
Where old Yoda resides,
A great Jedi Master withdrawn.
 
As Yoda and Skywalker train,
The Falcon is running in vain.
At last, Han seeks out
An old friend with some clout;
This Lando seems suave and urbane.
 
When Vader appears to reveal
That he and Lando had a deal,
Luke’s friends are now bait,
And refusing to wait,
Luke disregards Yoda’s appeal.
 
In Cloud City, Solo is set
In carbonite for Boba Fett,
Who heads for the Hutt
To acquire his cut,
While Luke by Darth Vader is met.
 
Their duel ends when Vader unveils
That Luke is his son and prevails.
Confused in disgrace,
With a hand to replace,
Luke flees with his friends from his fails.
_______________
 
On Tatooine, Luke plans to save
Solo from a carbonite grave,
But Jabba intends
To watch both of their ends
And make Princess Leia his slave.
 
With Lando and Chewie’s assistance,
Our heroes escape and make distance.
Ere Yoda’s demise,
Luke then learns as he dies
Of another Skywalker’s existence.
 
His sister is Leia, he knows,
Who’s back with the Empire’s foes.
They learn a Death Star,
Though not finished so far,
Will soon be too great to oppose.
 
With Luke, they all land on Endor
To nix the shield, but not before
They’re caught unawares
By some wild teddy bears,
Ewoks, who help them with the war.
 
Luke faces his father, as well
As the Emperor, keen to compel
The boy to collide
With the Force’s Dark Side
And to watch them all die who rebel.
 
The battle below on the moon
Goes well for the rebels, who soon
Disable the shield
Ere their doom has been sealed
And find the moment opportune.
 
Both father and son fight once more,
But Luke has improved since before.
The Emperor pays
When his servant betrays,
And Vader’s no threat anymore.
 
The Death Star’s destroyed not too late,
And rebels at last celebrate.
Jedi will increase,
And, his father at peace,
Luke now has fulfilled his own fate.
__________________
 

In reviewing the original Star Wars trilogy, one of the most popular franchises of all time, I will do my best to avoid overusage of the words “iconic” and “classic,” even though nearly everything in these films fits those descriptions. Few movies have such a perfect blend of comedy, action, romance, and imagination, which have yielded such a widespread and devoted following and a universal appeal.

The first film was a bolt from the blue in 1977. My mom remembers seeing it on a recommendation, being surprised at a jam-packed theater, and being so captivated by this new level of cool that she returned to watch it 7½ more times (yes, she once paid to see only half of it; that’s all she had time for one afternoon, and that was better than not seeing it at all). Every aspect of George Lucas’s brainchild exemplifies those two words I mentioned earlier: the commanding presence and deep voice of Darth Vader (surprisingly, James Earl Jones was not credited on the first two films’ initial release), the endearing companionship of R2-D2 and C-3PO, Kenobi’s wise introduction of various mythic elements like the Force and lightsabers, the astounding size and power of the Death Star, the roguish appeal of Han Solo (the role that made Harrison Ford a true movie star), the danger and humor of their rescue of Leia, the trigger-happy escape that makes one wish for an arcade, and the explosive finale. Plot points and individual scenes have become so ingrained in popular culture that their parodies and homages are more ubiquitous than even those of The Wizard of Oz and other films that have been around much longer. Among the film’s most arresting aspects was John Williams’s music, the greatest movie score of all time. Without it (as well as the groundbreaking visual effects and Ben Burtt’s ingenious sound effects), Star Wars might have been simply a cute little sci-fi film, but the bombastic score is what truly earns it the title of space opera. By today’s standards, the characters and their interactions might be considered a tad cheesy, but like Indiana Jones, they tap into their creator’s love of pulpy adventures and are so much fun that viewers today merely enjoy the ride and quote the film verbatim. It made household names of Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, and Carrie Fisher, and in my opinion, the original remains the best film in the entire saga.

Rarely are middle films the most popular, but The Empire Strikes Back has grown over the years to be the most esteemed of all the Star Wars films. It featured the memorable battle on Hoth, the introduction of wise outcast Yoda and dashing Lando Calrissian, the deepening of Han and Leia’s romance, and that classic shocker involving Luke’s parentage, a revelation so iconic that children today will be lucky if they can see the original surprise before some all-too-common spoof (there, I used them just once). As lauded as Empire Strikes Back is, I hold an unpopular opinion: it’s my least favorite of the original trilogy. Perhaps it is carryover from my mom recounting how she was disappointed when she first saw it, with the cliffhanger ending followed by three years of waiting, but I prefer the first and third films. Its darker tone doesn’t carry quite as much humor as its predecessor, and Luke’s training with Yoda slows everything down, even if it’s a necessary step in his progress as a Jedi. Plus, not once, not twice, but three times does the hyperdrive fail to work, a fact that allows for a great climax but a less-than-pleasing middle. I know practically everyone else disagrees, but that’s my opinion. It’s still a fantastic film that thickens the epic plot and relationships to unparalleled new levels; I just like Episodes IV and VI a bit better.

Why is Return of the Jedi just a little better? It’s not simply because of the presence of the satisfying conclusion, but the absence of any inner dislike on my part. Just as I didn’t mind Jar Jar Binks in The Phantom Menace, I don’t mind the Ewoks of Endor, who, compared with Binks, actually serve a purpose and manage to be more than just cutesy sidekicks. With all the weird and quirky aliens seen in Mos Eisley and Jabba’s palace (some of which are admittedly silly), I don’t understand why the Ewoks supposedly detract from the picture. Their primitive warfare with the Empire’s walkers creates some cheer-worthy victories; so what if they’re cute too? The slowness on Dagobah is kept to a minimum, and the film as a whole seems much more exciting than Empire. The battle on Jabba’s sail barge is one of the best, while the speeder chase through the forest is the most thrilling sequence of the whole film. (That chase also features an old-fashioned film technique at its best; the high-speed race through the trees was filmed by a camera just slowly advancing through the woods, which was then sped up for the finished product.) In the end, what this film and basically the whole saga is about is the fall and redemption of Anakin Skywalker, and, even though he had been solely villainous before Episode VI, even disregarding his depicted fall in the prequels, I actually felt sorry for Darth Vader. That’s one aspect that George Lucas definitely succeeded in; Luke’s confrontation with the Emperor and Vader’s subsequent salvation are what all the other films prepare and anticipate, a sad yet satisfying climax for one of the best trilogies of all time.

Who would have guessed that a cool idea in the mind of a young filmmaker would blossom into such a monumental success of a franchise? It’s not yet over too; by the end of this year, we’ll have the beginning of the next chapter in the Star Wars cinematic universe, courtesy of J. J. Abrams. Based on his work with Lost and Star Trek, I have high hopes for The Force Awakens this December. There’s nothing quite like the original films, though, with Luke Skywalker, Han Solo, Princess Leia, R2-D2, Darth Vader, characters as endlessly watchable as they are iconic (I couldn’t help myself).

Best line from Star Wars (could have been the whole script): (Han Solo and a general) “May the Force be with you.”
 
Best line from The Empire Strikes Back (could have been most of the script): (Darth Vader) “If you only knew the power of the Dark Side. Obi-Wan never told you what happened to your father.”   (Luke) “He told me enough! He told me you killed him!”   (Vader) “No. I am your father.”
 
Best line from Return of the Jedi: (Han Solo, captured by Jabba) “How we doin’?”   (Luke) “Same as always.”   (Han) “That bad, huh?”
 
 
Rank: 60 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

284 Followers and Counting

#7: Finding Nemo (2003)

02 Monday Feb 2015

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Though Marlin was once a free-spirited fish,
A tragedy filled him with fears.
For Nemo, his son, he has one simple wish,
To save him from risky frontiers.
 
One overprotective trip out from the reef
Sees Nemo abducted by men,
And Marlin is stricken with panic and grief
At sudden disaster again.
 
He’s met by a very forgetful blue tang
Named Dory, who joins Marlin’s quest.
After fish-loving sharks and an overdue bang,
They head out for Sydney southwest.
 
While Nemo is ushered to life in a tank
With fish-killing nieces expected,
His father and Dory, still drawing a blank,
Are challenged and helped and respected.
 
At last, they reach Sydney (from inside a whale)
And find Nemo after a flight.
Though Marlin considers his rescue a fail,
Both father and son reunite.
 
Employing the newest of fish common sense,
They save fellow fishes nearby,
And Marlin can now be less worried and tense
About his beloved small fry.
_________________
 

Pixar made a name for itself with the Toy Story films, but Finding Nemo truly solidified it as the premier animation studio. DreamWorks, Blue Sky, and even Studio Ghibli can’t compare with the consistent high quality of Pixar, which has only had one real dud (Cars 2), but out of an abundance of hits, my personal favorite animated film has to be Finding Nemo, for multiple reasons.

First of all, as a kid, I always insisted I’d be a marine biologist, and though my goals have changed over time, I still harbor affection for the fascinating denizens of the deep. The film also holds the record for bringing me to tears the fastest. Sure, I was under twelve when I first saw it, but I was deeply touched and invested within the first five minutes, an example of loss from a parent’s perspective rather than the usual child’s point of view.

Despite the heartbreaking beginning, Finding Nemo is arguably Pixar’s funniest film too, thanks to Ellen DeGeneres’s hilariously scatterbrained Dory, who suffers from short-term memory loss. That speaking-whale scene cracks my family up every time. Albert Brooks as Marlin is the perfect straight man to Dory’s lunacy, as well as a loving father, whose overprotective concern is revealed as true devotion in his quest to find Nemo. One more reason for me to love this film: it’s a meet-‘em-and-move-on, as many “quest” movies are. The myriad fish that Marlin and Dory encounter range from misunderstood to genuinely helpful to downright frightening, and it’s amazing how many sea creatures Pixar packed into this film, many of them with unique and comical personalities. Pixar has always excelled at introducing a large number of memorable characters in a way that seems rich and prolific rather than overstuffed, whether the toys in Andy’s room, the residents of Radiator Springs, or the colorful inmates of P. Sherman’s fish tank. (Note how the fish sound off where they were each bought, just as Andy’s toys named their respective manufacturers in Toy Story; also, I noticed that both this film and Disney’s Brother Bear that same year featured a similar joke involving a very limited game of “I Spy.” In addition, I wonder if a SpongeBob reference was intended in the naming of Sandy Plankton or Sheldon.)

The characters truly are brought to life with some of the most visually beautiful animation I’ve seen. The world of the coral reef teems with life and color, and the expressive character designs display deeply felt emotions without making them into cartoony human-fish (like DreamWorks’ paltry Shark Tale, released the following year). Most animated films take for granted the air around the characters, but Pixar outdid themselves with the underwater environment. Everything is moving, from the plants and dust around the sea floor to the realistic light and shadows filtering down from above.

With the heartfelt father-son relationship at its core, Finding Nemo is among the best animated films ever. Rather than an undeveloped dictatorial patriarch, Marlin is given clear motivation to protect his son, as well as clear reason to let go of his extreme caution in favor of trust. Before Toy Story 3, it was Pixar’s highest-grossing masterpiece, of course earning the Best Animated Feature Academy Award. With exceptional visuals and humor, Finding Nemo finds a well-deserved spot in my top ten; I’ve got my fins crossed for Finding Dory next year.

Best line: (Crush the sea turtle, voiced by director Andrew Stanton, after Marlin’s escape from the jellyfish) “Saw the whole thing, dude. First, you were all like, “Whoa”, and then we were like, “WHOA” and then you were like, “whoa….” (It’s better heard than read.)

 
Rank: 60 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

283 Followers and Counting

#8: Titanic (1997)

01 Sunday Feb 2015

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The RMS Titanic plowed the icy North Atlantic
And made headlines and history when swallowed by the sea.
It served as quite a backdrop for a rendezvous romantic
Between an aimless artist and a fiancée set free.
 
When Rose is brought aboard the ship, she sees her future set,
A world of wealthy well-to-dos and proper parties planned,
But when the lass is rescued from a self-delivered threat,
Jack Dawson introduces her to his own world firsthand.
 
Although her mother and her haughty, cold fiancé Cal
Insist she stay away from Jack and keep to codes and class,
Her heart and hopes have superseded moneyed rationale,
For love is theirs until an iceberg makes a fatal pass.
 
As water floods into the ship, there’s order up on deck,
But when that deck begins to lean, anxiety begins.
With nowhere near enough lifeboats, this monumental wreck
Will claim the lives of most who panic to the violins.
 
The grand Titanic sinks beneath the frigid ocean waves,
And only six are rescued by the lone returning boat.
Though 1,500 fell below to dark and unmarked graves,
A sworn survivor strove to live, not just remain afloat.
_____________________
 

One of the greatest film achievements belongs to James Cameron and his historic Titanic, tied winner of the most Academy Awards, eleven in total. While the film’s prestige seems to have waned since the director’s cheesy “I’m king of the world” speech at the Oscars, it remains a moving romance and an unparalleled spectacle of magnificence brought low.

While it didn’t win any acting Oscars, both Roses were nominated, the lovely Kate Winslet as young Rose and the trauma-wearied Gloria Stuart as elderly Rose. Though not outstanding, the acting is uniformly good, from Kathy Bates as the unsinkable Molly Brown, Billy Zane as Rose’s arrogant husband-to-be Cal Hockley, Bill Paxton as modern-day treasure seeker Brock Lovett, and Bernard Hill and Victor Garber as the ship’s captain and designer, respectively, both overwhelmed with the grief and guilt of helming a deathtrap. Leonardo DiCaprio found his first big budget role here, and though he’s gone on to ever greater fame, it wasn’t until Inception that I saw him as anything but artist/lover Jack Dawson.

It’s a sad fact that, just as The Hunger Games is most entertaining when the blood sport commences, the best part is the massive ship’s epic floundering, both realistically tragic and awesome to behold. The couple’s wandering through the dying vessel allows multiple perspectives, from the gradually slanting upper deck to the water-logged lower levels, the desperate passengers behind locked gates and the former splendor of state rooms being swallowed from below. The Oscar-winning visual effects are indeed wondrous, giving a sense of the astounding size of this vanquished metal beast. Even so, I find it almost humorous how many times Jack and Rose trade each other’s names; from when Rose finds Jack below to her rescue, I counted 48 Jacks and 32 Roses.

In addition to winning Best Picture, Director, Visual Effects, Cinematography, Art Direction, Film Editing, Costume Design, Sound, and Sound Effects Editing, it truly deserved wins for James Horner’s majestic Celtic-infused score and for the song “My Heart Will Go On,” sung by Celine Dion over the end credits (earning a place in my Hall of Fame). The music adds much to the film’s beauty and grandeur and deepens the characters’ emotions. The romance itself is not the very best, so perhaps it was the music that put it over the edge for me. Titanic holds special meaning to me because I probably saw it too young; I cried harder at this film’s finale than at any other movie before or since, to the point that I swore I would never again watch it. While that oath obviously didn’t stick and the film doesn’t touch me quite as deeply, it’s still sublimely sad, with a final scene worthy of a meet-‘em-and-move-on reunion, even if the film doesn’t fit into that mold.

Though not the first film about the Titanic (which was 1912’s Saved from the Titanic, starring an actress who survived the sinking) nor the last (the recent 2012 miniseries Titanic featured quite a good ensemble), James Cameron’s Titanic will forever be the film version for the ages, against which all others are compared. With real underwater footage of the wreck and an epic depiction of the film’s floundering, its flaws are easily overlooked (among them the unnecessary language and nudity and the absence of any heroism among the wealthy passengers; also my VC feels the throwing away of the diamond was pointless). Even so, it deserved every one of its accolades and is still a truly spectacular experience.

Best line: (Jack, after they’re in the water) “I don’t know about you, but I intend to write a strongly worded letter to the White Star Line about all of this.”

VC’s best line: (Jack) “I figure life’s a gift, and I don’t intend on wasting it. You don’t know what hand you’re gonna get dealt next. You learn to take life as it comes at you… to make each day count.”

  
Rank: 60 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

283 Followers and Counting

#9: Toy Story Trilogy (1995, 1999, 2010)

31 Saturday Jan 2015

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(Spoilers ahead)
 
In Andy’s bedroom, where imaginings thrive,
When he’s not around, all his toys come alive.
Potato Head, Slinky, Bo Peep, Hamm, and Rex
Are always afraid of what toy he’ll get next,
But cowboy doll Woody insists that they stay
Collected and calm on their owner’s birthday.
 
When Andy arrives with his new Buzz Lightyear,
The other toys welcome their space ranger peer,
But Buzz doesn’t know he’s a child’s plaything,
And Woody’s annoyed by his self-deluding.
As Andy snubs Woody in favor of Buzz,
The cowboy grows bitter with thoughts of what was.
 
A misunderstanding at terrible cost
Leaves Woody and Buzz isolated and lost,
And soon they are caught by the sick neighbor kid,
The evil, sadistic, toy-torturing Sid.
As Andy is wondering where his toys are,
Both Woody and Buzz meet with mutants bizarre.
 
When Buzz at last realizes he is a toy,
It’s Woody who cheers him to strive for their boy.
A frightening warning puts Sid on the run,
But now they must rush; Andy’s move has begun.
Some chasing and launching and falling with style
Bring both to their kid, and to Andy a smile.
_________________
 
As Cowboy Camp beckons, there’s sudden alarm
When ol’ Woody suffers a rip in the arm.
A rescue attempt for a playmate in need
Lets Woody fall victim to one villain’s greed.
A nasty collector abducts the old doll,
Who enters a world that he knew not at all.
 
He meets Jessie, Bullseye, and old Stinky Pete,
Who welcome him since he makes their set complete.
He sees he is famous and rare merchandise
And soon to be sold in Japan at great price.
Though Woody insists at first he must return,
He changes his mind out of care and concern.
 
Meanwhile, his friends from the bedroom are out
To rescue him, taking a dangerous route.
Despite some setbacks and a Buzz Lightyear clone,
They locate the cowboy to take him back home.
While Woody is torn on the choice of his fate,
True colors are shown until it is too late.
 
The toys are packed up by the covetous man
And head to the airport, en route to Japan.
Deciding that Andy will value them all,
They swing from the plane with a very close call.
The toys journey home for fun playdates anew,
Until Andy grows up, as all children do.
_________________
 
The time has arrived: Andy’s finally grown,
Less likely to play than to chat on his phone.
Though toys have diminished in number and note,
They wait for their owner, however remote.
Some misunderstandings, which happen a lot,
Leave most of them feeling unloved and distraught.
 
They donate themselves to a nearby day care,
Where there reigns a strawberry-scented stuffed bear.
This Lotso presents them to quaint Sunnyside,
But playtime is brutal for those who don’t hide.
Though Woody escapes to go home, he is found
By Bonnie, whose penchant for play is profound.
 
The other toys learn Sunnyside is unfair
For new toys and those that don’t please the big bear.
When Buzz is brainwashed to imprison his friends,
They follow the plan Woody then recommends.
The prison break seems to go just as they planned,
But Lotso arrives when escape’s close at hand.
 
The tables are turned with a trip to the dump,
Where deus ex machina saves in a slump.
Though Woody would gladly be Andy’s forever,
He hints at the best way for their ties to sever.
The toys find themselves in a new home to dwell
After one last playdate and a poignant farewell.
_______________________
 

The first computer-generated feature film could have been any number of lackluster productions, but as luck would have it, the pioneering feat was accomplished by the most skilled storytellers in the animation business, the folks at Pixar. Toy Story was an intrinsic part of my childhood; with the exception of Hamm, Jessie, and Bullseye, I owned all of the main characters. Woody and Buzz Lightyear are among the most beloved animated characters ever created, and they were introduced at the perfect time in my youth for me to become attached to them as more than just throwaway kiddie entertainment.

The first Toy Story may look dated in its animation compared with Pixar’s more recent endeavors, but even if the humans are lacking, the CGI is ideal for the plastic residents of Andy’s room. With the unique look at suburbia from a toy’s perspective, it was the first glimpse of the immense imagination at work at Pixar, able to introduce an ensemble of characters and make everyone both lovable in their own way and wisely merchandisable. Almost everybody has owned a toy and can thus appreciate the characters’ obvious desire to be loved and valued by their owner. While this connection to the heart allows these inanimate objects to become as real as any animated human or talking animal, the sly humor keeps the entertainment value at a 10, thanks largely to the sterling voice cast. Tom Hanks and Tim Allen were in their heyday in 1995, fresh from dual Oscar wins for Hanks and the success of “Home Improvement” and The Santa Clause for Allen, but, unlike some more recent celebrity voiceovers, both were undoubtedly the best choice. Their progression from rivals to buddies is both hilarious and convincing, supplemented by a host of golden supporting characters, like Wallace Shawn’s timid Rex, John Ratzenberger’s clever Hamm, and Don Rickles’ belligerent Mr. Potato Head. The film won a special Academy Award, predating the creation of the Best Animated Feature Oscar by six years.

As perfect as the original film is, Toy Story 2 is even better. The first film took its core concept (that toys come to life when we’re not looking) and ran with it, giving them real emotions of affection, envy, betrayal, and dejection; the sequel further explores the expansive possibilities of toydom: being broken, being forgotten and abandoned, being just one of countless doppelgangers, being valued as a collectible rather than a child’s plaything. The imagination keeps coming, with greater danger, more memorable characters (Joan Cusack’s Jessie, Kelsey Grammer’s Stinky Pete), and some unexpected laugh-out-loud references to Jurassic Park and Star Wars. Jessie’s backstory, in particular, still wets my eyes and instilled in me what I call “toy guilt,” a reluctance to give up old toys for fear of traumatizing them (I’ve since gotten over it, mostly). The fact that the film was essentially a rush job due to over-optimistic scheduling makes its achievement even more impressive. Since I consider it the best of the trilogy, it’s a shame it’s the only one that didn’t win an Oscar.

I was skeptical about Toy Story 3, a sequel released a full decade after its predecessor, but it delivered the Pixar goods against all odds. While it’s not quite on par with the first two, the improved animation is worlds away and the same unbridled imagination is at work in the creation of a prison camp day care ruled by a plush bear (a grandfatherly Ned Beatty). The film supposedly introduces at least 150 new characters, and I believe it; from the teeming playroom at Sunnyside, full of under-utilized voice talent, to Bonnie’s room (including a Totoro, courtesy of John Lasseter’s fascination with Miyazaki), the new faces are abundant and diverse, though not all quite as memorable. The film’s heart and action are plentiful, though the humor isn’t quite as generous (I didn’t find Buzz’s Spanish mode as funny as the filmmakers seemed to think it is). This threequel is a source of some contention between my VC and me. She was rather depressed at the loveless situation at the beginning and was left unsatisfied with Andy giving up his toys in the end, feeling that they should have awaited his children in the attic, like my Buzz and Woody currently are. Yet deep down, I think Andy knew that toys are meant to be played with, and children are their core happiness. As mentioned in Corinthians, he “put away childish things,” but not with the cold indifference of Emily in Toy Story 2; he took the time and effort to give them a fitting home and one last playtime to bid them goodbye. This was also important because he was able to pass on their names to Bonnie; without knowing the titles of Woody and Buzz, she might have called them Mrs. Nesbitt or some such moniker. As frighteningly dramatic as the dump sequence is, the final scenes are equally bittersweet, a near-perfect tear-inducing conclusion for these beloved characters. As much faith as I have in the creative minds at Pixar, I almost wish they would leave Toy Story 4 alone and avoid the potential stumble of fourth movies, which are even harder to pull off than threequels, as evidenced by the Pirates and Indiana Jones series.

Rotten Tomatoes indicates that the Toy Story films form the most acclaimed trilogy ever, with 100% for the first and second and a 99% for the third. I’ve enjoyed every one, as well as Buzz’s spinoff TV series Buzz Lightyear of Star Command, a fun and imaginative sci-fi show from my youth. Though I’ve grown up parallel to Andy and outgrown my own childhood companions, at least I’ll never outgrow these beloved toy stories.

Best line from Toy Story: (Woody) “YOU ARE A TOY! You aren’t the real Buzz Lightyear! You’re – you’re an action figure! You are a child’s plaything!”   (Buzz) “You are a sad, strange little man, and you have my pity. Farewell.”
 
Best line from Toy Story 2: (2nd Buzz, to Zurg) “I’ll never give in. You killed my father.”   (Zurg) “No, Buzz, I am your father.”   (2nd Buzz) “Noooooooo!”   (a great line in any movie)
 
Best line from Toy Story 3: (Jessie) “Woody, we were wrong to leave Andy. I—I was wrong….”   (Mr. Potato Head) “Jessie’s right, Woody. She was wrong.”
 
 
Rank: 60 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

283 Followers and Counting

#10: Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989)

28 Wednesday Jan 2015

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Indiana Jones is back to find the Holy Grail,
His father Henry’s disappeared but left a learned trail.
When Walter Donovan commissions him to seek it out,
Jones finds the journal of his father, bookish and devout.
 
In Venice, Dr. Elsa Schneider joins him to assist,
For underneath a library, dark catacombs exist.
They find a clue but barely flee the rat-infested tomb,
Before the fez men follow them and nearly seal their doom.
 
To Austria, they fly to find his father captured by
A group of Nazi Grail-pursuers in a castle high.
The pair of Joneses reunite and make the room combust,
But not before a revelation and betrayal of trust.
 
Two chases later, both of them head to the Middle East,
Where Henry’s captured on a tank and narrowly released.
The Canyon of the Crescent Moon is where their journey ends,
And Indy’s forced to find the Holy Grail as death portends.
 
Through deadly trials, Indy goes to claim the waiting prize,
And as the villains follow him, their choices are not wise.
Though history is lost, our heroes let it go, dismayed,
But ride into the sunset until their next escapade.
_____________________
 

I know most people tend to prefer Raiders of the Lost Ark, but for me Last Crusade is that rare threequel that surpasses the original. It borrows the best elements from Raiders: a Biblical MacGuffin, a booby-trapped temple, Nazis as the villains, Sallah and Marcus Brody, and a gruesome (though not as gruesome) death for the villain.

What puts Last Crusade over its predecessor, though, can be summed up in two words: Sean Connery. Harrison Ford is always a blast as the famous title character, but to make his father a mild-mannered James Bond ups both the heart and the humor. Rather than being the unflappable hero of the first film, Indy has a mental match in his estranged father, who may lack the level-headed physicality but is more like his son than either recognize. Henry Jones, Sr.’s dedication to his work made him a distant, poor father, but his son clearly inherited a similar commitment, not to mention his womanizing tendencies. Putting them together allows for some humorously contentious dialogue and some realistic father/son moments ranging from disapproval to grief to shared devotion.

Of course, this wouldn’t be an Indiana Jones film without some outstanding action sequences, and it doesn’t disappoint. While nothing quite matches the truck chase in Raiders, the film as a whole is a nonstop thrill ride, with ancient flammable crypts, speedboat chases, motorcycle chases, airplane chases, tank chases, and some clever booby traps to match the beginning of the first film. The opening sequence is a stroke of genius too; while not directly connected to the main plot, as are the beginnings of the other films, it gives an unexpected glimpse of Jones in his youth. River Phoenix pulls it off, with a comic-book-style train chase that offers action and some answers about Jones himself.

While the film may just seem like a series of chase scenes, it offers all the humor and twists of the original, just in a slightly more family friendly package. I especially like the scene in which the sole profanity is chastised by the elder Jones as blasphemy, one of the few instances in modern-day films where it is called out and condemned, allowing for a telling illustration of the differences between father and son. The final resolution of the quest not only confirms the authenticity of the sacred artifact in question (and the myths surrounding it) but contrasts the blind ambition of Elsa with the wiser discernment of the Joneses. Plus, it ends on the most perfect of perfect notes, a final ride into the sunset, a fantastic wrap-up for the franchise…oh, wait, yeah, there was that fourth movie. Still, this could have been an unparalleled conclusion.

Decidedly better than Temple of Doom and Crystal Skull and just a little better than Raiders, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade is one of the most enjoyable actioners ever made. While not quite as iconic as Raiders, it still remains influential, even for Spielberg himself, who used a similar motorcycle chase in his Adventures of Tintin. Though my VC pointed out that Last Crusade made a helpless tagalong out of Marcus Brody, who had more dignity in the first film, it doesn’t get much better than the dual star power of Ford and Connery.

Best line: (the butler) “This is a castle, and we have many tapestries, but if you are a Scottish lord, then I am Mickey Mouse!”   (Indy to Elsa, with Scottish accent) “How dare he!” [punches his lights out]

VC’s best line: (Nazi leader) “Dr. Jones?”   (Indy and Henry, simultaneously) “Yes?”

 
Rank: 60 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

283 Followers and Counting

#11: The Princess Bride (1987)

27 Tuesday Jan 2015

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Listen, dear viewers, and you shall be read
A story just like a sick child in bed,
About miracles, fencing, escapes, and true love,
Promises made and the efforts thereof
And a farm boy named Westley thought to be dead.
 
He said to his love that he would return
And not a thing could keep him away,
But Buttercup is upset to learn
That the Dread Pirate Roberts came to slay.
Burdened by grief, she catches the eye
Of Prince Humperdinck, a duplicitous guy.
Ere they are wed, she is caught by three
Colorful, talented killers-to-be,
Vizzini, Montoya, and Fezzik, who flee.
 
They are followed, though, by a man in black,
Coming to kidnap their prisoner back,
Facing the three of them, one by one,
Defeating each, and once he has won,
From Buttercup, Westley gets a smack.
The two through the Fire Swamp take their track
And fight when enormous rats attack.
Catching them, Prince Humperdinck won’t share
That he’s locked Westley in the Pit of Despair.
 
Meanwhile, Montoya and Fezzik unite,
Planning revenge for a family crime,
But they need Westley to plan it this time.
The two of them free him, though mostly dead,
Revive him with a miracle bite,
And before the wedding bells can chime,
Help him inside ere the couple can wed.
 
When he finds the man he’s been hunting for,
Montoya takes revenge at last,
And because true love is unsurpassed,
When Westley challenges pain galore,
Prince Humperdinck will not compete
Against a man death can’t defeat.
When Buttercup and the trio of men
Depart for safer hill and glen,
The two lovers kiss as never before.
You wouldn’t mind hearing the tale once more?
As you wish; I’ll come again.
______________________
 

The Princess Bride is one of the most perfect films around, not in any grand or profound way, but in its timeless, endlessly amusing creation of a modern fairy tale, based off the book by William Goldman, who also wrote the screenplay. I know I’m not alone in saying that this is a film I could watch any day of the week, while quoting much of the ingenious dialogue. It never ceases to entertain, and I think everyone involved in its production realized what a special film they produced.

The cast is a treasure trove of comedic talent, from Wallace Shawn as disdainful Vizzini to Andre the Giant as strong but gentle “land mass” Fezzik to Billy Crystal’s hilarious cameo as Miracle Max, who proves that chocolate does indeed have life-giving properties. Cary Elwes as Westley and Robin Wright as Buttercup (one of her first roles) are ideal starry-eyed lovers, the one gallant and dashingly British and the other beautiful, though rather helpless. The film is well-recognized for its abundance of potent quotables, and every character gets a memorable line, often several. Who can forget Mandy Patinkin as Inigo Montoya spouting his rehearsed threat to his father’s killer, or Wallace Shawn’s “Inconceivable,” said as only he can? Some droll moments are also given to the villains, Chris Sarandon as self-assured Prince Humperdinck (I wonder if his first name is Engelbert) and Christopher Guest as soft-spoken sadist Count Rugen. Even small roles like Mel Smith as the Albino and Peter Cook as the Impressive Clergyman get some Monte Python-style humor from their unexpected voices.

Though The Princess Bride parodies typical fairy tale tropes, it embraces them as well, like a more sincere version of a Mel Brooks comedy. Consider when Vizzini calls out “Behold, the Cliffs of Insanity!” followed by some overly dramatic music, yet the cliffs themselves do play a role in the tale, and their pretentious name doesn’t preclude real danger. The film’s depicted framework of a bedtime story, read by Peter Falk, lends the film a detached fascination, so that the audience can laugh while also becoming invested in the characters’ struggles. Quite a lot of work went into the filming as well, particularly the expert duel between Elwes and Patinkin, who did all but the somersaults themselves. Moments of whimsy alternate with moments of genuine passion to create a family film for all ages (though a single profanity from Fred Savage as the boy was unnecessary). The Oscar-nominated song “Storybook Love,” sung by Willy DeVille, is also worthy of a place in my End Credits Song Hall of Fame.

As I said, I can watch this film forever, but it was only recently that my attention was brought to a small but important detail. The Princess Bride is a Christmas movie! I didn’t believe it at first, but at the very beginning, there are lights and snow outside and a small lighted tree out in the hall, as well as a Santa hanging behind Peter Falk the whole time. I always assumed the book was a get-well-soon gift, but it’s a Christmas present. Now we all have one more reason to watch it, as if we needed another excuse. It’s got everything a good fairy tale needs and a great deal more besides.

Best lines (I wish I could just say the whole movie): (Vizzini, when Westley doesn’t fall from the Cliffs) “He didn’t fall? Inconceivable!”  (Inigo) “You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.”
 
(Inigo Montoya) “Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.”
 
(Miracle Max, when he lifts and drops Westley’s lifeless arm) “I’ve seen worse.”
 
(Westley, after knocking out the giant Fezzik) “I do not envy you the headache you will have when you awake. But for now, rest well and dream of large women.”
 
(Westley, after returning from almost-death) “Who are you? Are we enemies? Why am I on this wall? Where is Buttercup?”   (Inigo) “Let me explain. [pauses]  No, there is too much. Let me sum up.”
 
(Westley and the Grandfather) “As you wish.”
 
 
Rank: 60 out of 60
 

© 2015 S. G. Liput

283 Followers and Counting