Tag Archives: Comedy

#200: My Girl (1991)

23 Monday Jun 2014

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Vada Sultenfuss resides
In a funeral home; besides,
She’s just eleven, but her knack
Is being a hypochondriac.
Her one real friend is Thomas J.,
Who is allergic, by the way.
On her teacher, she has a crush,
Which she hides, despite a blush.
Although it’s summer, Vada speeds
To a class that Mr. Bixler leads,
A writing class for poetry,
Which she composes childishly.
 
Her undertaker dad did list
His need for a cosmetologist.
One Shelley answers, though misled,
And needs the job, despite the dead.
She’s worried for young Vada, who’s
Obsessed with death and morbid views.
Though Vada likes her, she grows mean
When Shelley and her dad are seen
Beginning a relationship,
Which Vada would much rather skip.
Yet Shelley’s kind and helps her through,
When fears of growing up debut.
 
Once Vada shares a kiss, her first,
With Thomas J., then comes the worst.
He goes to seek her lost mood ring,
But hornets swarm him as they sting.
Poor Vada’s shocked to learn he’s dead,
And at his funeral tears are shed.
She’s further stunned when it is said
That Mr. Bixler will soon wed.
She runs off, but when she returns,
Her father calms her deep concerns,
And life goes on with newer friends
And less distress for how life ends.
__________________
 

My Girl is one of those classic coming-of-age tales that also has an unexpected tearjerker ending. Though it lacks the obvious voiceover of Stand by Me, the whole film feels like a childhood flashback etched on someone’s memory. Anna Chlumsky is perfectly cast as young Vada Sultenfuss and does so well that it’s a shame she hasn’t done much else, though she’s had a recent comeback on shows like HBO’s Veep. Coming a year after Home Alone made him a star, the film also reminds us of how cute Macaulay Culkin was back in the day as the ever-allergic friend Thomas J. Dan Aykroyd and Jamie Lee Curtis are also spot-on in very different roles from when they starred together in Trading Places eight years earlier.

As with Murphy’s Romance, much of the film’s charm lies in its small moments: Vada’s first kiss with Thomas J., her incessant visits to the doctor to confirm that she’s dying (or not), Harry and Shelley’s bingo night (hmm, that is like Murphy’s Romance). There are also some hilarious scenes that exemplify the word dysfunctional. Picture this: Vada’s father carries on a conversation at the dinner table while her grandmother starts singing a Gershwin song while Vada is on the floor, pretending that her prostate is killing her. I can’t help but laugh.

With its innocent portrayal of childhood in 1972, My Girl is mostly clean as well (aside from some sexual dialogue during the poetry class), unlike other foul-mouthed coming-of-age stories like American Graffiti and Stand by Me. It’s a charming film that is sad, sweet, and funny all at once, with a ‘70s soundtrack and a touching poem at the end. What’s not to like?

Best line: (Vada) “Why do you think people want to get married?” (Thomas J.) “When you get old, you just have to.”

 
Artistry: 8
Characters/Actors: 8
Entertainment: 9
Visual Effects: N/A
Originality: 8
Watchability: 9
 
TOTAL: 42 out of 60
 

Next: #199 – Philadelphia

© 2014 S. G. Liput

136 Followers and Counting

 

Murphy’s Romance (1985)

22 Sunday Jun 2014

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Emma Moriarty,
Who is hard-working and hearty,
Moves with son to Arizona,
With no money but a plan.
Having had it with divorces,
She will board and train some horses.
Soon she meets a town persona
Who is one heck of a man.
 
In the drugstore that he owns
Works the trusty Murphy Jones,
Who is so opinionated
That he’d rather pay in cash
Parking tickets he’s accepted
Just so his old car’s protected
So it won’t be desecrated
By a hoodlum acting rash.
 
Though he doesn’t help at first,
He proves kind when not coerced,
Helps her business getting started,
And makes visits frequently.
Emma’s ex soon rears his head,
In need of money and a bed
And acts as if they’d never parted,
Which she swallows grudgingly.
 
Bobby Jack is charismatic
But a loser problematic.
Though he claims that he has changed,
He is still a selfish jerk.
Murphy isn’t getting thinner
As he always stays for dinner.
Jealous glances are exchanged,
But Murphy doesn’t shirk.
 
After all four bond a while,
Emma won’t stand Bobby’s guile,
But before she sends him packing,
His twin babies find the place.
He stands up (perhaps) to duty,
Leaving with his latest beauty,
While poor Emma finds what’s lacking
In old Murphy’s warm embrace.
_________________
 

The year after she won the Best Actress Oscar for Places in the Heart, Sally Field filled a role both different and similar in Murphy’s Romance. Still a strong single mother forced to work for a living, she is more independent and self-reliant here while also depending on help from Murphy. Oscar nominee James Garner turns in his finest performance as the titular Murphy, who has just the right amount of folksy charm and tough, down-to-earth wisdom to make up for the fact he’s nearly twice Emma’s age. Brian Kerwin is appropriately unlikable as the loser ex-husband Bobby Jack (he utters the film’s lone F-word), while retaining some evidence of why Emma first found him appealing.

Since the plot is pretty simple and uneventful, the film thrives on its dialogue, and it’s one of the most underrated quotable movies out there. Murphy and Emma trade sharp wit throughout the film, and little lines here and there have found their way into my own family’s conversations. I love the affectionately realistic mother-son relationship between Emma and Jake, as well as the fond depiction of small-town life, preferring country dances and innocent bingo halls to slasher films and such. My VC also likes the score by Carole King (who had a cameo), featuring David Sanborn on sax.

Nevertheless, it deserves its PG-13 rating, with several profanities and some brief scenes of nudity and violence thrown in to appease the studio. The final scene indicating Emma and Murphy will spend the night together may be romantic, but it seems to ignore the fact that Emma’s son Jake is right there in the house. Aside from that, their clever exchanges are the highlights of the film and make it a near-perfect romance.

Best line: (Emma, questioning the number of candles on Murphy’s birthday cake) “Okay, what is it? How old are you, Murphy?”   (Murphy) “Just set the damn thing on fire.”

VC’s best line: (Murphy, at his birthday party) “My friends have overlooked my shortcomings, seen me through some dark days, and brightened up the rest of them. I’m glad to have them; I’m honored to have them; I’m lucky to have them.”

 
Artistry: 8
Characters/Actors: 9
Entertainment: 9
Visual Effects: N/A
Originality: 9
Watchability: 10
Other (language, brief violence): -3
 
TOTAL: 42 out of 60
 

Next: #200 – My Girl

© 2014 S. G. Liput

136 Followers and Counting

 

Phineas and Ferb the Movie: Across the 2nd Dimension (2011)

14 Saturday Jun 2014

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Phineas and stepbrother Ferb are summer’s biggest fans;
They’ve spanned the Tri-State Area with all their clever plans,
From robot selves to giant sharks to rollercoaster rides,
But Mom can never see them, though the duo never hides.
 
Meanwhile, the family’s platypus named Perry sneaks away
To battle Dr. Doofenshmirtz, whose evil fails each day.
These plots can sometimes touch, but until now have never crossed.
When both boys meet ol’ Doof, poor Perry’s secret may be lost.
 
They help him fix his latest scheme, the Other Dimensionator,
Which opens up a portal to a world where Doof’s dictator.
This even more malicious creep exposes Agent P,
And Phineas is shocked that Perry’s lied so rampantly.
 
They flee from both the Doofenshmirtzes, needing help and fast.
They meet their other-dimension selves, both timid by contrast.
To get back home, they seek the aid of those resisting Doof,
Led by their sister Candace, who is hardened and aloof.
 
The Candace from the first dimension also joins the team,
But Perry has been caught, and they must save their monotreme.
Their rescue doesn’t go as planned, and punishment awaits,
But second Candace saves them from their less-than-lucky fates.
 
The first-dimension characters then seize the chance to flee
Through many strange dimensions to their own reality,
But things are not much brighter since the second Doofenshmirtz
Releases robot armies, which nobody else averts.
 
With Agent P’s assistance, his two boys start fighting strong
With the many cool inventions that they’ve built all summer long.
When at last they fight the mastermind, they shut the robots down,
And first-dimension Doofenshmirtz ends up saving the town.
 
The first dimension’s saved, and now the second’s also freed,
And everyone is glad as life and summer can proceed.
Yet Agent P must leave, now that his secret is revealed,
And Phineas and Ferb now wish that he’d remained concealed.
 
In order to still keep their pet, they all somehow agree
To have their memories erased, including Dr. D.
So only Perry can recall how good his two boys are
And how they helped him on the greatest summer day, so far.
_______________________
 

As the placement of this film indicates, I am a huge fan of Disney Channel’s hit cartoon Phineas and Ferb. As I mentioned in my SpongeBob SquarePants review, films based on TV shows are usually a mixed bag, but this one is certainly the best, acting like a culmination of everything the show has excelled at.

First of all, the show itself is downright hilarious, and it thrives most in its running gags, strange little throwaway jokes that get funnier every time they appear, like an easter egg. For instance, in one episode, Buford mentions that a giant robot flamingo is the second biggest flamingo he’s ever seen, and then a while later there’s a whole episode dedicated to the biggest flamingo he had seen. In this TV film, there are a number of details that first-time viewers may not get, such as the giant floating baby heads or the newspaper-reading zebra that calls Candace “Kevin” (boy, that sounds weird), but luckily the film has a nice balance of remaining entertaining to newcomers while catering to longtime fans as well.

As with “Phineas and Ferb’s Quantum Boogaloo,” a very well-thought-out and layered time travel episode, the film tackles the subject of other dimensions with surprising intelligence, reflected even in some minor jokes. What other kids’ film has existentialist trading cards and a line like “Would you like to trade two Sartre for a Nietzsche?” I like how the film and show make the characters more quirky than stupid, like some other cartoons I could mention.

Another reason to love the film is the music. Show creators Dan Povenmire and Jeff “Swampy” Marsh, who voice Doofenshmirtz and Major Monogram respectively, are musical geniuses, as far as I’m concerned. I’m amazed at how they’ve been able to include a song in just about every episode, and while they’re not all perfect, they span every genre, and most blend clever lyrics and rhymes with extremely catchy tunes. The film continues this tradition with songs ranging from ’70s-style falsettos to summer-praising ballads to robot destruction rock. The dimension-spanning “Brand New Reality” is my favorite, but “Summer” and “Robot Riot” are close behind.

The film would have worked well as a grand finale for the entire series, but the show continues the clever reworking of its routine storylines to this day. There was supposed to be a theatrical Phineas and Ferb film coming sometime soon, but, if it never happens, at least there will be this gem of a musical comedy to keep fans like me laughing.

Best line (echoing a repeated line from the show): (Carl the intern, at a touching scene near the end) “Sir, are you crying?” (Major Monogram) “No, I’m sweating through my eyes.”

 
Artistry: 3
Characters/Actors: 7
Entertainment: 8
Visual Effects: 5
Originality: 10
Watchability: 8
 
TOTAL: 41 out of 60
 

Next: #208 – Casablanca

© 2014 S. G. Liput

129 Followers and Counting

 

Spy Kids 2: The Island of Lost Dreams (2002)

07 Saturday Jun 2014

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Both Carmen and Juni are now superspies,
Esteemed for their expertise and their small size.
They’re called in to rescue the President’s daughter
When she gets in danger so her dad will spot her,
But Gary and Gerti, the Giggles, step in
And steal all the spotlight, to Juni’s chagrin.
 
A formal spy banquet gives cause for concern
When Donnagon Giggles, who’s crooked we’ll learn,
Is named the new head of the whole OSS,
When really it should have been Mr. Cortez.
Some magnetic henchmen who do not play nice
Attack and obtain the Transmooker device.
 
Though Juni is blamed for the prized gadget’s loss,
His sister, through hacking, just sidesteps their boss.
They send the two Giggles on some dirty mission
While they take a coveted new expedition.
They’re sent to an island that doesn’t exist,
But when their sub shuts down, it cannot be missed.
 
Their gadgets are useless upon this strange isle,
And after exploring and falling awhile,
They locate Romero, a scientist who
Made hybridized creatures to fill his own zoo.
These beasts run amok while their maker yet hides,
But he proves of use with the news he provides.
 
He built the Transmooker, which hides this whole isle,
And tells how to find it through many a trial.
Once they have fought skeletons, monsters, and Gary,
They get the Transmooker; it’s dangerous, very.
Meanwhile, their parents and grandparents track
Their whereabouts so they can bring the kids back.
 
At last, there’s a standoff between the two sides,
Cortezes and Giggles (Romero besides).
Though Donnagon’s winning, his daughter won’t let
Her father take over the world as a threat.
The villain is fired as OSS head,
And Mr. Cortez gets that honor instead.
Romero connects with his creatures at last,
And all the Cortezes, a team unsurpassed,
Go back home together. (The credits go fast.)
______________________
 

After the initial success of the first Spy Kids, it certainly had the potential to grow into a “keeper” of a franchise, and this sequel just confirmed that. Most people probably like the first one better, but I like Spy Kids 2 more because it ramps up the sheer coolness to new heights and leaves out the loopy weirdness of Floop for the most part in favor of more awesome weirdness.

In many ways, this film feels like Robert Rodriguez’s melting pot, in which he threw so many seemingly random elements that somehow still came together into a coherent and entertaining adventure. There are impressive gadgets, crazy theme park rides, magnet-heads, robot bugs, sea monsters, bottomless volcanoes, a mad scientist, flying pigs, Harryhausen-esque skeletons, miniature crossbreeds, giant crossbreeds, a flying wheelchair, girl power, and even Antonio Banderas’s mustache. The part with the skeletons and mind-reading does feel rather out of place, but any movie that can manage all that so successfully is quite an achievement.

Alexa Vega and Daryl Sabara do just as well here as in the first film, and Steve Buscemi balances silliness and sincerity as Romero. It’s a shame that the villainous Donnagon (Mike Judge), as well as “Uncle” Felix (Cheech Marin), show so little gratitude for the fact that the Cortezes saved them from life as Fooglies in the first film. Yet Donnagon’s two children Gary and Gertie are welcome additions to the Spy Kids lineup, as are Holland Taylor and Ricardo Montalban as Ingrid Cortez’s parents. Plus, Bill Paxton looked like he was having fun in the opening scene at the amusement park.

With so much added to the franchise with this film, it’s a real shame that it degraded so quickly to Spy Kids 3-D. Journey to the Center of the Earth has many scenes clearly meant for 3-D, but it didn’t distract from the film too much. It was nice that Ricardo Montalban got more screen time, but Spy Kids 3-D was so obviously gimmicky and flimsy that its visuals and large cast could not save it from being a big disappointment for a franchise that had seemed to be getting better and better.

Even so, Spy Kids 2 stands out as another fun adventure, once again celebrating family ties. The special effects aren’t perfect but have a unique look that is sometimes reminiscent of Jason and the Argonauts. Plus, that concert at the end in which Alexa Vega sings “Isle of Dreams” is energetic, funny, and deserving of a spot in my End Credits Song Hall of Fame. Good stuff.

Best line: (Gary, and later Juni) “An agent is only as good as his gadgets.” (which is subtly disproved later on)

 
Artistry: 5
Characters/Actors: 7
Entertainment: 8
Visual Effects: 7
Originality: 6
Watchability: 7
 
TOTAL: 40 out of 60
 

Next: #215 – Dances with Wolves

© 2014 S. G. Liput

125 Followers and Counting

 

City Slickers (1991)

02 Monday Jun 2014

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When Ed has ideas for insane daring-do,
He gets his two pals Mitch and Phil to come too.
Mitch feels somehow trapped in his unfulfilled life,
And often complains to his kids and his wife.
They all soon are sick of his cynical view.
 
Phil also has problems; he’s scared of his spouse.
He’s hesitant, timid, and scared as a mouse.
His wife comes to learn that he had an affair,
Since frankly their marriage did not have a prayer;
He loses his job and is kicked from the house.
 
Ed has issues too with commitment and such,
But he has a plan for a surefire crutch:
A real cattle drive with real cattle to drive
To help them be cowboys, austere and alive.
Mitch goes, but he isn’t excited too much.
 
They meet other city folk, bound for the trail,
And Curly the trail boss, who’s tough as a nail.
They transport the herd, starting off with “Yaw hoos,”
To New Mexico with a chorus of moos.
They hope to revitalize life through travail.
 
When Mitch, making coffee, provokes a stampede,
He’s taken by Curly to find cows in need.
He’s scared of the cowboy but proves his own worth
By helping a cow have an impromptu birth.
He looks up to Curly, a now dying breed.
 
The cowpoke tells Mitch he must find his one thing
That makes life worthwhile and keeps it in swing.
Not long after that, Curly suddenly dies.
They must do without him, so rugged and wise.
The trip goes awry without his guiding wing.
 
At last, their friends scattered, it’s Mitch, Ed, and Phil
Who keep the cows moving with moxie and will.
They help cross a river, where Mitch nearly sinks
But saves the young calf he delivered (he thinks).
They all prove themselves by surviving the thrill.
 
They save the cows, but, after crossing the water,
They learn all the cattle are destined for slaughter.
So Mitch takes the calf and his old smile back.
Withstanding their crises, they’re all back on track,
And Mitch found his one thing: his wife, son, and daughter.
_______________________
 

City Slickers is yet another Billy Crystal classic with a winning mix of comedy and drama. The midlife crises of the three friends are all pretty realistic, even when handled comically, and their conversations, such as describing their best and worst days, provide welcome depth to their characters and motivations. Crystal’s typically clever banter again steals the show, and, though the film isn’t a laugh riot all the way through, it has periodic lines and moments of hilarity that make it very entertaining.

Billy Crystal and his When Harry Met Sally… co-star Bruno Kirby are always an amusing pair (Kirby hid his horse allergy very well), and Daniel Stern is equally well-cast as the adulterous Phil, who mourns how his life has gone down the tubes. But the one who earned the most critical praise and an Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor was Jack Palance as the gravelly-voiced Curly, who evokes leathery toughness and rustic sagacity with his impressive if too brief performance. Also, I was surprised to see that this movie was Jake Gyllenhaal’s film debut as Mitch’s 10-year-old son.

There is some unfortunate and unnecessary profanity and sexual dialogue, but City Slickers is still a rousing and enjoyable western comedy. Plus, that calf sure is adorable!

Best line: (Curly, as Mitch is reaching into a cow to help it give birth) “What’s taking so long? Do you see the head?”
(Mitch) “Ew. I only see a tail.”
(Curly) “Oh, s***. It’s turned the wrong way. Get it out.”
(Mitch) “Uh, oh. My watch came off.”
 
VC’s best line: (Mitch, to Ed) “Ed, have you noticed that the older you get, the younger your girlfriends get? Soon you’ll be dating sperm.”

 

Artistry: 7
Characters/Actors: 8
Entertainment: 9
Visual Effects: 5
Originality: 7
Watchability: 8
Other (language and sexual dialogue): -5
 
TOTAL: 39 out of 60
 

Next: #220 – Pinocchio

© 2014 S. G. Liput

117 Followers and Counting

 

Steel Magnolias (1989)

01 Sunday Jun 2014

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Now this is the tale of six friends from the South,
All women with strength and a very smart mouth.
M’Lynn is the mother of Shelby, a bride,
Who knows her mom worries but takes it in stride.
There’s Truvy, a stylist who’s hired Annelle,
Whose husband just left her and put her through hell.
Then lastly Clairee, quite the gossip and teaser,
Enjoys poking fun at her grouchy friend Ouiser.
 
The wedding goes well, though it causes much stress;
There’s shooting and screams, but it’s still a success.
Though Shelby’s a known diabetic, she’s glad
To soon become pregnant; her mother is mad.
The doctors told Shelby her body’s too weak,
But Shelby rebuff’s M’Lynn’s angry critique.
Supported by friends, Shelby bears a sweet boy;
Her time with her baby is truly a joy.
 
Her kidneys, however, are worse than they’ve been,
So she gets a transplant of one from M’Lynn.
Her body can’t take it, and problems arise;
She enters a coma and quietly dies.
M’Lynn, brokenhearted, is soothed by her peers,
Who prove there are more ways to cope than just tears.
Real life marches on, caring not how we feel,
But these girls are tough, like magnolias of steel.
________________
 

Steel Magnolias is, quite frankly, the ultimate chick flick, but it is based on a play that was surprisingly written by a man. Robert Harling wrote it as a tribute to his sister, who died as Shelby did, and the deep emotions he infused into the story are certainly felt. These emotions are sad, yes, but also quite humorous. The dialogue is full of marvelous wit and cleverness and sounds very much as a group of gossipy Louisiana women should. My VC enjoys the music as well, which has just the right amount of Southern wistfulness. It’s a film that can have you giggling one moment and in tears the next. A scene toward the end exemplifies this dichotomy, suggesting that a good laugh is essential when things get too serious.

This film made Julia Roberts a gorgeous star and made Daryl Hannah ugly (at least compared with, say, Splash!). Roberts is very convincing as the stubborn diabetic Shelby, while Sally Field is equally dexterous as the justifiably worried M’Lynn. Though both deserved Oscar nominations (if not wins), only Roberts received one. The role of Truvy the neighborhood beautician fits Dolly Parton to a T, and Daryl Hannah is appropriately awkward as Annelle. My favorite characters, though, have to be Olympia Dukakis as Clairee and Shirley MacLaine as Ouiser. MacLaine especially steals every scene she’s in, and between the two of them, they receive the majority of the good lines and hilarious vignettes.

I suppose the plot mainly focuses on Shelby and her choice to have a child despite the risks, but the film belongs to all the characters. Their individual stories all melding into an entertaining slice of life are what make the film so enjoyable. There’s Tom Skerritt’s sparring with Ouiser (who’s nearly as formidable as that Alien); there’s Annelle’s newfound religiosity that annoys her friends at times; there’s Clairee’s little story for Shelby’s son that is sure to instill fear of Ouiser for years to come. It’s certainly a chick flick, but these little snapshots of life make it a darn good one.

Best line (so many to choose from): (Clairee, when grumpy Ouiser comes in) “Ouiser, you sound almost chipper. What happened today – you run over a small child or something?”

VC’s best line: (Ouiser) “I’m not crazy, M’Lynn. I’ve just been in a very bad mood for forty years!”

 
Artistry: 8
Characters/Actors: 10
Entertainment: 9
Visual Effects: N/A
Originality: 7
Watchability: 9
Other (language and crude elements): -4
 
TOTAL: 39 out of 60
 

Next: #221 – City Slickers

© 2014 S. G. Liput

117 Followers and Counting

 

Scrooged (1988)

29 Thursday May 2014

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If Francis Cross, a TV boss,
Were dead, no one would mourn the loss.
He’s cruel and mean, at times obscene,
Controlling every TV screen.
At Christmas time, the selfish slime
Promotes his live Scrooge on prime time.
He quickly bags the slightest nags,
Like Eliot, who’s sunk to rags.
 
Then Frank one night is shown a fright;
His old dead boss appears in sight.
He tells Frank he indeed will be
Soon visited by spirits three.
While Frank at first believes the worst,
His fears of spirits are dispersed.
He talks with Claire, who’s quick to care
But left him long before his scare.
 
Frank still freaks out when there’s no doubt;
The Ghost of Christmas Past’s about.
He smokes and drives; soon Frank arrives
In his past, watching former lives:
His own childhood misunderstood
And how his job trumped Claire for good.
When this Ghost ends, Frank tries amends
With Claire, who cares for homeless friends.
 
Frank’s selfishness still causes stress,
And his alarm creates a mess.
The Present’s Ghost is Frank’s next host
And loves to pummel Frank the most.
His secretary, poor but merry,
Is shown by the ghostly fairy.
Frank then sees his bro at ease
And some poor man who chose to freeze.
 
The future next leaves Frank most vexed;
It’s even worse than he expects.
It scares him straight; he soon can’t wait
To do good and avert this fate.
Though Eliot had just had it
And tried to shoot Frank in a fit,
Frank gladly hires the man he fired
And has him help his plan inspired.
 
While on the air, Frank does declare
His love for Christmas and for Claire.
He steals the show and tells folks go
Outside and smell the mistletoe.
Claire comes that night, despite stage fright,
And on TV they reunite.
The joyful throng then sings a song
In one big merry sing-along.
____________________
 

Scrooged is a comedic merging of Dickens’s classic A Christmas Carol with the macabre humor of Beetlejuice, and Bill Murray as the Scroogish Frank Cross pours his talented unlikability into the role. Far more nasty than he was at the start of Groundhog Day, Murray succeeds in making the audience hate him just as much as many characters do, thus making his ghostly punishment and his turnaround at the end utterly satisfying. The film has plenty of humor, though it’s not nearly as quotable or laugh-out-loud funny as his earlier Ghostbusters, and there’s a healthy dose of weirdness thrown into the mix, such as Carol Kane’s bizarre yet strangely gratifying penchant for walloping Frank as the Ghost of Christmas Present. At least he deserved it since he was a self-proclaimed “schmuck.” (By the way, I take issue with that word since I had a teacher named Mrs. Schmuck and she was very nice.)

Karen Allen plays his winsome lost love, who is given more of a role than Scrooge’s Belle, and Bobcat Goldthwait goes hilariously nuts as Frank’s luckless ex-employee Eliot Loudermilk. Robert Mitchum, John Forsythe, and Alfre Woodard round out the main cast. Aside from these principal roles, the film has more random ‘80s cameos than a Muppet movie, tossing in Buddy Hackett, Jamie Farr, Lee Majors, Robert Goulet, John Houseman, and Mary Lou Retton just for the heck of it.

The somewhat dated Scrooged may lack the religious overtones of the original story and throws in some unfortunate language and sexual dialogue, but by the end, one cannot help but smile as Murray talks to the TV camera, thus breaking the fourth wall as he addresses the movie audience as well. The final rendition of “Put a Little Love in Your Heart” is downright classic and deserves a place in my End Credits Song Hall of Fame. As they say in the film, “Yule love it!”

Best line: (Frank, during the broadcast at the end) “It’s Christmas Eve! It’s… it’s the one night of the year when we all act a little nicer, we… we… we smile a little easier, we… w-w-we… we… we cheer a little more. For a couple of hours out of the whole year, we are the people that we always hoped we would be!”

 
Artistry: 6
Characters/Actors: 7
Entertainment: 8
Visual Effects: 6
Originality: 8
Watchability: 7
Other (language, sexual dialogue): -3
 
TOTAL: 39 out of 60
 

Next: #224 – Remember the Titans

© 2014 S. G. Liput

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Forget Paris (1995)

28 Wednesday May 2014

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 When Andy and Liz are about to be married,
They talk over dinner while waiting for friends.
When Andy refers to one story quite varied,
Liz bids him continue to see how it ends.
 
He talks about Mickey, a loathed referee,
Who buried his unloving father in France.
The airline misplaced him for days (though for free),
But Mickey met Ellen and sparked a romance.
 
They spent time in Paris, their love growing strong,
And Mickey was heartbroken having to leave.
He later found out she was wed all along,
But was separated with no cause to grieve.
 
She got a divorce and left Paris for Mickey.
Their traveling honeymoon was truly great,
But settling down proved a little more tricky;
The schedules of each made the other one wait.
 
Whenever one half of the pair was contented,
The other was miserable, mad, and depressed.
They tried very hard, but the more they lamented
The more each of them felt entrapped and oppressed.
 
They tried having children but could not conceive,
And with Mickey’s travels, they drifted apart.
At last Paris beckons and Ellen must leave,
And both of them feel like they have half a heart.
 
By this time, poor Liz is heartsick and in tears,
From this tale that’s been told by the friends who arrive.
For Mickey they wait, but a guy overhears
And tells them the news from a game he saw live.
 
While Mickey was doing his referee role,
A woman approached, and the couple embraced.
Indeed, it was Ellen, to make their hearts whole,
And not let their marriage and love go to waste.
 
She said “Forget Paris,” for they have moved on,
And though it be tough, they will try it once more.
Then Mickey and Ellen show up close to dawn,
And all give a toast with the ones they adore.
___________________
 

Forget Paris is a romantic comedy in the same vein as Nora Ephron’s films, but it was actually Billy Crystal, one of the stars of Ephron’s When Harry Met Sally…, who directed, produced, co-wrote, and acted in this charming depiction of the highs and lows of married life. It is replete with comic situations and hilarious lines, such as a snarky waiter who keeps comparing himself to different wines, and much of Crystal’s dialogue sounds like clips from his stand-up performances. Some may think it strange to see him romantically involved with anyone other than Meg Ryan, but Debra Winger has good chemistry with Crystal and can usually match his wit and comic timing pretty well. Though she normally takes dramatic roles, that scene with the pigeon proves how great a comedic actress she can be. This is also the film that marked the start of her six-year hiatus from movies.

The film has a laudable lesson of sacrifice for the sake of sticking with a difficult marriage, though it’s unfortunate that the main characters are miserable most of the time. It’s ultimately a film that lets the audience laugh at a situation that would normally make them cry if it were actually happening to them. No one would want to spend time with a kooky father-in-law who repeats the same thing over and over; no one wants to be left alone by a spouse who travels for months at a time; and certainly no one wants to have a pigeon glued to their head. Yet seeing other people deal with such issues makes the film extremely entertaining. On the other hand, it takes itself seriously enough to deal with the very real problems that marriages face, and Mickey and Ellen’s bickering certainly sounds like an authentic married debate.

Lest Forget Paris devolve into an overly sentimental chick flick, such as those mocked in Sleepless in Seattle (and to some extent in this film too), Crystal threw in a welcome element for the guys in the audience. As a referee, Mickey gets to interact with a number of famous basketball players and mouth off to them however he likes. The way he snaps over too many complaints is hilarious, and I’m sure Crystal had a lot of fun doing those scenes.

There are some problems with the film, such as the mandatory premarital-sex-to-show-how-in-love-they-are cliché. Foul language is present, though minimal, and there is a rather uncomfortable sequence involving a sperm donation. Despite these, Forget Paris has a unique framing structure; a number of talented stars, including Julie Kavner, Richard Masur, and Joe Montegna; and a heartwarming ending (similar to that of When Harry Met Sally…) that indicates there’s hope for every marriage so long as the couple don’t give up on love.

Best line: (Mickey) “Never say ‘famous last words’ because they could be.”  (Ellen) “You’re a disturbed person, aren’t you?”   (Mickey, apparently mimicking Jeremy Irons from Reversal of Fortune) “You have no idea.”

VC’s best line: (Ellen, about her first husband) “No, he makes me miserable.”   (Mickey) “Well, I could do that! Come on, give me a chance.”

 
Artistry: 8
Characters/Actors: 8
Entertainment: 9
Visual Effects: N/A
Originality: 8
Watchability: 9
Other (language, sexual dialogue): -3
 
TOTAL: 39 out of 60
 

Next: #225 – Scrooged

© 2014 S. G. Liput

115 Followers and Counting

 

The Brave Little Toaster (1987)

25 Sunday May 2014

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A toaster and radio, lamp and a blanket,
As well as a vacuum called Kirby reside
Alone in a mountainside cottage and spend
Their days cleaning up the old cabin’s inside.
 
They dream of the day when their Master will come,
The boy who would play with their dials and chrome.
One day Toaster says they should go on a trip
To the city and locate their Master’s new home.
 
They load on an office chair, battery-powered,
With Kirby propelling them over the fields.
They run into animals after a song,
As well as a storm and the power it wields.
 
Through dangers they travel until they are nabbed
By Elmo St. Peters, who’ll harvest their parts.
They trigger a jail break with their fellow tools
And head for the city with all of their hearts.
 
They find the apartment the Master calls home,
But he will soon leave for his school’s freshman year.
His other appliances, jealous of them,
Send Toaster and friends to the dump when they’re near.
 
So close to destruction, they nearly lose hope,
But Master’s in search of a handy device.
He finds them but nearly is killed by a crusher,
Till Toaster saves him with a brave sacrifice.
 
Delighted to have his appliances back,
Nostalgia drives him to repair the old tool.
Again with the Master, they cruise off to college
To service their owner while he is at school.
___________________
 

Coming out soon after The Great Mouse Detective, The Brave Little Toaster was another sign that Disney was gradually improving its animation department, leading to the Disney Renaissance a few years later. With touches of The Incredible Journey, it also is a clear forerunner of 1995’s Toy Story and included some filmmakers, such as Joe Ranft, that went on to success at Pixar. The idea of inanimate objects coming to life when left alone, pining for their owner, and ending up in a dump no doubt inspired the first and third Toy Story films, and the appliances’ retaliation against Elmo St. Peters is similar to the toys’ revenge on Sid, who also cruelly takes them apart.

To be honest, parts of the movie are very juvenile, particularly the encounter with the woodland creatures, and the first song is okay but rather saccharine. Yet the film gets progressively darker as it goes, with the appliances cheating death on several occasions. Plus, the climax is unusually intense considering its lighthearted beginning, and it features a traumatic clown scene that may induce coulrophobia in the young.

The animation is passable, but the voice actors do a tremendous job creating their respective characters, particularly Jon Lovitz as the overly talkative Radio and Thurl Ravenscroft as Kirby the vacuum cleaner. (I kept expecting the latter to say “They’re grrrrrreat!”) All the characters are also surprisingly well-developed, each one (aside from Toaster) being unlikable in their own way but proving their worth by providing a valuable service during the trek. Plus, you’ve got to love all the appliance humor.

The best part for me is definitely the songs. As I said, the first song “City of Light” is good for what it is, but the songs get increasingly ambitious, rising above the music in other kiddie films. My VC loves “It’s a B-Movie,” and I most enjoy “Worthless,” an extremely catchy tune with a brief saxophone solo and some very serious subject matter when you get right down to it. (I know both by heart.) “Cutting Edge” is also quite good, though it dates the film with its boasting of what was high-tech back then.

All in all, The Brave Little Toaster is an excellent kids’ movie in which adults can find plenty to enjoy as well. For kids at heart, like me, it’s a true classic.

Best line: (Radio; it comes out of nowhere so it’s funniest with no explanation) “Why, if we were all wiener dogs, our problems would be solved.”

 
Artistry: 5
Characters/Actors: 8
Entertainment: 7
Visual Effects: 5
Originality: 8
Watchability: 6
 
TOTAL: 39 out of 60
 

Next: #228 – Rocky II

© 2014 S. G. Liput

115 Followers and Counting

 

Sister Act (1992)

10 Saturday May 2014

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Deloris Van Cartier now is in danger
For seeing a murder, but not from a stranger.
Her boyfriend named Vince is a mobster, it seems,
And Reno’s not safe with his myriad schemes.
She goes to police, who have witness protection
And place her somewhere sure to ward off detection.
 
She leaves her job singing in clubs to begin
Her time in a convent, much to her chagrin.
Disguised as a nun, “Mary Clarence” prepares
To lie low and pray to the Big Guy Upstairs.
The strict Reverend Mother alone knows the truth
And dislikes Deloris, who seems so uncouth.
 
Deloris is shocked at their habits ascetic;
Their choir and parish are rather pathetic.
Befriending some nuns, she’s impelled to the choir
And tries to light up the nuns’ long-dormant fire.
The new practiced choir is unveiled at Mass
And sounds better, bringing in people who pass.
 
The old Reverend Mother thinks this is too strange,
But others are thrilled at the musical change.
Deloris and friends start to live out their calls
And help the community outside the walls.
They soon hear the Pope will be coming to hear
The Sisters, but soon Vince’s goons interfere.
 
Locating Deloris, they take her to Reno
To answer to Vince at his fancy casino.
The nuns follow after and rescue their “Sister,”
And Vince is arrested when lawmen assist her.
Deloris, to wrap up her life as a nun,
Conducts the Pope’s concert and wows everyone.
___________________
 

Sister Act is proof that Hollywood can handle religion in film without always mocking it. There are references to the nuns as “penguins” and the cliché of some nuns being overly strict killjoys, which some may indeed be. Despite these aspects, the film confirms the nuns’ way of life and service to God and man by the end. They assist the community, they earn respect even from mobsters, and, although the updated music style isn’t quite reverent enough for a church service (in my opinion), it nonetheless gives glory to God and manages to attract pedestrians into the church for the Mass’s message. On top of all this, the movie is actually funny and surprisingly clean.

From Whoopi Goldberg’s usual clever banter in the face of danger to Kathy Najimy’s overly perky Sister Mary Patrick, the film offers up some great fish-out-of-water laughs (Deloris’s prayer before the meal always earns a chuckle) alongside some memorable musical numbers. I especially like how they rewrote “My Guy” as “My God,” and the reimagined version of “Hail, Holy Queen” is truly glorious.

The best part is, despite showing Deloris’s seedy mobster boyfriend (played by Harvey Keitel), the film never shows its violence, and the language is kept at a believable minimum. Sister Act was one of Whoopi Goldberg’s best films and definitely deserves a place on my list.

Best line: (Reverend Mother, to the nuns in a Reno casino, looking for Deloris) “Brace yourselves, sisters. Spread out and look for Mary Clarence. Try to blend in.”

 
Artistry: 6
Characters/Actors: 7
Entertainment: 9
Visual Effects: N/A
Originality: 7
Watchability: 9
 
TOTAL: 38 out of 60
 

Next: #240 – Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves

© 2014 S. G. Liput

103 Followers and Counting