Tag Archives: Romance

Moonstruck (1987)

03 Monday Mar 2014

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Loretta Castorini is Italian and it shows
In the bickering of father Cosmo and her mother Rose,
In the frank, straightforward way that she insists he do it right
When her boyfriend Johnny suddenly proposes one odd night.
But Johnny’s rather hesitant to want to set a date,
And he has to leave for Sicily; his mother’s death won’t wait.
 
Before he goes, he begs his bride to call his brother Ronny,
Who’s held a grudge for many years against his brother Johnny.
Loretta visits Ronny at his bakery and pad,
And she learns he blames his brother for an accident he had.
When Ronny was engaged, his brother came to buy some bread,
And the slicer chewed his hand off and his dear fiancée fled.
 
Ever since, he has been bitter, and he hollers at Loretta,
Who is unimpressed with Ronny and his ludicrous vendetta.
When she cooks a steak for Ronny and explains his life to him,
Ronny sweeps her off her feet and promptly beds her on a whim.
Both Ronny and Loretta and her family all swoon
When they see the aphrodisiac that is the shining moon.
 
When morning light arrives, Loretta instantly regrets
Her own passion, and the fact that Ronny loves her now upsets.
She still agrees to go with him to La Boheme that night
And, after confession, primps herself so she will look just right.
That night, both she and Ronny meet each other at the Met,
And she notices her father with a date that makes her fret.
 
When Ronny gives a speech on love and bids her come to bed,
She falls again, unlike her mom who curbs temptation’s spread.
But Johnny’s back from Sicily; his mother’s gotten better.
He needs to tell her something that cannot be said by letter.
When Loretta comes back home, her mother knows what she has done,
And they wait for Johnny’s entrance, but he’s not the only one.
 
First, Ronny shows up, wanting to announce that they’re a pair,
Then Cosmo grudgingly agrees to end his own affair.
The grandpa, aunt, and uncle come and fill the kitchen table,
Then Johnny shows and says, as far as marriage, he’s unable.
If he marries, he’s afraid his mom will die, so Ronny moves
And proposes with his brother’s ring, and everyone approves.
__________________________
 

Moonstruck is a romantic comedy that presents a quirky snapshot of Italian life in New York, minus the car bombs and shootings of a certain other film about Italian Americans. Cher is enjoyable to watch in her Oscar-winning performance, one of the few to win Best Actress for a comedy. Nicholas Cage also stand out as Ronny Cammareri, as do Olympia Dukakis as Rose and Vincent Gardenia as Cosmo. The film is loaded with excellent quotes, from Cosmo’s rehearsed oration about copper pipe to Cher’s classic “Snap out of it!” when Ronny professes his love. Not to mention, my VC and I both love the wacky mannerisms and idiosyncrasies of Loretta’s expressive but loving family, Cosmo’s throwing up his hands and insisting “I don’t wanna talk about it,” Johnny constantly forgetting his bags. The grandfather’s reaction to the kitchen table conversation at the end is just hilarious.

All that said, I don’t care for a main aspect of the “romance.” Loretta and Ronny’s liaison seems centered on making love, which, while passionate, seems to build their relationship on lust rather than real love. They hardly know each other during their first tryst, and there isn’t a whole lot of connecting before the next one either. Loretta is clearly attracted to him in a better way, but Ronny’s impassioned speech ends with “get in my bed,” which is kind of a letdown since Loretta’s main appeal to him is apparently just sex. Still, faithfulness is nicely extolled in Rose’s refusal to cheat on her own philandering husband.

I also appreciate the filmmakers’ comparative restraint concerning nudity and language, which allows the ingenious screenplay to shine without a bunch of unnecessary profanity. Moonstruck is an entertaining film that features some great performances and dialogue and pokes fun at Italian eccentricities that everyone should get a kick out of. (Again, my VC would have it much higher on her list.)

Best line (a hard choice): (Cosmo) “You’ll have your eyes opened for you, my friend.”
(Johnny) “I have my eyes open.”
(Cosmo) “Oh yeah? Well, stick around. Don’t go on any long trips.”
(Johnny) “I don’t know what you mean.”
(Cosmo) “I know you don’t. That’s the point. I’ll say no more.”
(Johnny) “You haven’t said anything!”
(Cosmo) “And that’s all I’m saying.”

 

VC’s best line (in reference to an earlier line): (Rose) “Do you love him, Loretta?”
(Loretta) “Aw, ma, I love him awful.”
(Rose) “Oh, God, that’s too bad.”

 

Artistry: 7
Characters/Actors: 8
Entertainment: 8
Visual Effects: N/A
Originality: 6
Watchability: 7
Other (language and Ronny’s apparent shallowness): -6
 
TOTAL: 30 out of 60
 

Next: #308: The African Queen

© 2014 S. G. Liput

 

#310: The Karate Kid (1984)

02 Sunday Mar 2014

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When Daniel LaRusso moves to the west coast
From New Jersey because of his mom,
He isn’t too pleased with the run-down apartment
And shows it and yet remains calm.
 
His feelings start changing when kids his own age
Invite Daniel to beach party fun.
Attracted to Ali, who’s lovely and rich,
He thinks a good thing has begun.
 
But then her ex-boyfriend named Johnny shows up
And pummels poor Dan to the ground.
From then on, our hero is picked on and bullied
Whenever adults aren’t around.
 
But Daniel begins to befriend a repairman
At home by the name of Miyagi.
He knows of karate and thrashes Dan’s foes
When the boy is all battered and groggy.
 
While Daniel is eager to learn how to fight,
Miyagi insists he be smart
And talk to the bullies’ karate instructor,
Who’s ruthless in his martial art.
 
Miyagi suggests that all fighting be done
In a tournament two months away.
The teacher agrees that the violence should stop
But only to train for that day.
 
The next several weeks, Daniel feels like a slave
As he’s told to do chore after chore,
Like waxing and painting and sanding and such,
Which turn out to be something more.
 
These tiresome tasks may at first have seemed dull,
But they train Daniel’s arms and his hands.
With time, Daniel’s balance and technique improve,
And he fathoms Miyagi’s demands.
 
He learns that Miyagi was in World War II
And lost both his wife and his son.
When Dan has a birthday and need of a car,
His caring sensei gives him one.
 
His friendship with Ali, meanwhile, seesaws
Since he fears that he’s too poor for her.
He overreacts but admits his mistake,
And they’re soon just as close as they were.
 
The tournament comes, and the boy does quite well,
And both Daniel and Johnny advance,
But Johnny’s sensei tries to get Daniel hurt,
And he thinks that he’s ruined Dan’s chance.
 
Miyagi, however, helps Daniel recover,
And, back in the ring, Daniel tries
A kick that he noticed Miyagi once doing
And wins both respect and the prize.
______________________
 

The Karate Kid is a typical 1980s underdog tale that is essentially a martial arts version of Rocky set in high school, even sharing the same director as the 1976 boxing classic. Nonetheless, it rises above its overfamiliar plot elements (the newbie in town, the “cool” bullies, etc.) to become an inspiring classic in its own right with a unique young/old friendship found in only a few other movies, such as Up. (I will say that the beginning bears much resemblance to 1987’s The Lost Boys, minus the vampires—one of my VC’s personal favorites.) Many scenes are time-honored favorites, from Miyagi’s “wax on, wax off” lesson to the iconic crane kick that ends the film on an undeniably uplifting note. I also like the way it deepened Mr. Miyagi’s character, pointing an oblique spotlight on the afflictions of the Japanese Americans at Manzanar, as well as the heroism of the Nisei soldiers in Europe. Plus, the soundtrack is pretty good too, featuring hits like “Cruel Summer” and “You’re the Best.”

Despite brief language and some cruel high school antics, The Karate Kid is one of the great underdog stories on film, and, though I have not seen the remake with Jackie Chan, between “Pat” Morita’s quiet portrayal of Mr. Miyagi and Ralph Macchio’s likable if immature Daniel, I doubt it can be done better.

 

P.S.  Sorry for the recent hiatus last week. I had to focus on my taxes, but I hope to make up for it in the (hopefully near) future.

 

Best line: (Daniel) “I’m not by myself. I’m with you.”  (Miyagi) “To make honey, young bee need young flower, not old prune.”

 
Artistry: 6
Characters/Actors: 7
Entertainment: 7
Visual Effects: N/A
Originality: 4
Watchability: 7
Other (language): -1
 

Tomorrow: #309: Moonstruck

© 2014 S. G. Liput

 

Working Girl (1988)

22 Wednesday Jan 2014

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Tess McGill’s a secretary, bottom of the corporate ladder.
As she tries and fails to climb it, she gets more upset and sadder.
Sick of jobs where sleazy bosses chase her round the desk all day,
She gets a job with Katharine Parker, whom she’s happy to obey.
 
For Katharine’s nice and treats Tess well, encouraging her secretary,
Tess is so relieved to have a boss who doesn’t seem contrary.
Bringing Katharine her idea about a radio acquisition,
Tess is sure she has no reason to have any bad suspicion.
 
Then, while skiing, Katharine’s injured; she’ll be out a couple weeks.
So Tess, with Katharine’s voice recorded, practices her voice techniques,
Until she hears, from Katharine’s mouth, that Katharine stole her radio plan,
And, back at home, Tess finds another woman sleeping with her man.
 
Choosing then to take control of where her life and job are going,
Tess decides to act like Katharine’s colleague, with nobody knowing.
Using Katharine’s clothes and office, Tess avails her expertise
To pitch the thought of radio as perfect for Trask Industries.
 
She needs somebody else to help: Jack Trainer, who’s behind her plan,
Which gets Trask into media and stops a seizure from Japan.
Jack also brought Tess home one night when she had had too much to drink,
But still they work together better than that start might have one think.
 
Flattery and wedding crashing get them where they want to be,
And then – surprise! – they fall in love. But who could possibly foresee
That Katharine had been dating Jack, who says he’d rather be with Tess?
But when Miss Parker comes back home, she snatches Tess’s great success.
 
The truth is known, and Katharine (with her crutches) gets the sympathy,
But Jack decides that he believes Tess, though the others disagree.
Yet when Trask attempts to ask how each of them derived the plan,
Kate draws a blank but Tess can say, convincing them that she’s their man.
 
In the end, Tess goes to work for Trask, who’s thoroughly impressed.
Dating Jack, her love life too has also been immensely blessed.
Though, at first, she thinks she’s back to cubicles and making do,
Soon she sees that she has power and an office with a view.
_____________________________
 

Working Girl is a Cinderella story set against the backdrop of the New York banking industry, but this time the damsel transforms her own life without any magical assistance. The acting and the story are outstanding, particularly the performances of Melanie Griffith as Tess, Harrison Ford as Jack, and Sigourney Weaver as Katharine. (Despite the star power and several Oscar nominations, the film only won for best song, and Ford was snubbed entirely.) The characters have humor and charm to spare, and, even with the girl power message, I, as a guy, still enjoyed it. My VC, as a chick, loved it.

I will say that the director and writer included some completely unnecessary adult content, such as language and two scenes of nudity, that detracted from the film overall and was probably thrown in there just to get the Oscar-worthy R rating. Plus, as I mentioned in my previous review for Entrapment, the story has the two leads inevitably and unimaginatively sleep together.

The best part of the whole film, in my opinion, is the Oscar-winning song “Let the River Run,” which plays at the beginning and end and definitely deserves a spot in my End Credits Song Hall of Fame. It’s incredibly lovely and inspiring, though one can’t help but sigh when the Twin Towers are shown so prominently in the opening. (The lobby scenes were even shot in the World Trade Center.) Though it could have been cleaner and the financial jargon flew way over my head, Working Girl is nevertheless a fun and very entertaining romantic comedy.

Best line: (Jack, after Tess has completely passed out from Valium and alcohol) “Would you like a nightcap?”

VC’s best line: (guy) “She took a muscle relaxant for the flight down.”  (Katharine, giddily) “Oh, let’s all have one, shall we?”

 
Artistry: 6
Characters/Actors: 8
Entertainment: 7
Visual Effects: N/A (unless you count those huge ‘80s hairdos)
Originality: 6
Watchability: 7
Other (language and nudity): -7
Other (great song): 1
 
TOTAL: 28 out of 60
 

Tomorrow: #343 – Lars and the Real Girl

© 2014 S. G. Liput

Entrapment (1999)

21 Tuesday Jan 2014

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A thief steals a painting, a priceless Rembrandt,
They climb through a window but jostle a plant.
The method they use is not lost on Gin Baker,
Who thinks “Mac” MacDougal must be the art’s taker.
This Gin works for Waverly Insurance, who
Lets Baker go find Mac to prove if it’s true.
 
She goes undercover and says she’s a thief,
But Mac isn’t prone to undoubting belief.
A pro past his prime, he is nonetheless drawn
By her plan for a theft that she wants him in on.
It may be entrapment, but Mac blackmails Gin,
And takes her to Scotland where they can begin.
 
They train for the heist of a gold Chinese mask.
It’s priceless; they don’t tell its worth so don’t ask.
And, as it’s clear nobody trusts anybody,
The facts of who’s crooked and straight become muddy.
They pilfer the mask with a smart strategy,
Contorting through lasers to leave a monkey.
 
Mac knows Gin’s a traitor and practically drowns her,
But Gin gives an offer while she starts to flounder,
A heist she’s been planning for years (what a kidder!),
And eight billion dollars makes Mac reconsider.
They go to Malaysia, which Gin rather likes;
The world’s tallest building is where they will strike.
 
Millennial eve, while the world is distracted,
Their masterful plan is discreetly enacted.
By fooling a clock, they succeed in their crime
To transfer eight billion, in just enough time.
But then one mistake takes their plan out of shape;
They go to great heights to attempt to escape.
 
Yet only Gin makes it, while Mac stays behind.
The next day, the FBI knows where to find
The wanted Gin Baker. Turns out I was wrong.
Mac was helping them catch her, the thief all along.
Yet Mac helps her flee; then she quickly comes back.
She has plans for a heist, and, for that, she needs Mac.
________________________
 

I am not a big fan of caper films, simply because I don’t care for filmmakers getting viewers to root for a criminal to succeed. I have that same reservation for Entrapment, but I can overlook it mainly due to the two leads. Catherine Zeta-Jones is attractive (to say the least) as Gin Baker, and Sean Connery is as good as ever as Mac, the aging thief who’s always one step ahead; together, they’re thick as thieves. With gadgets that would make James Bond envious, the two somewhat succeed in their heist (with only one billion dollars), but at least the rest of their loot is returned by the end. It helps that, until the end, at least one of the main characters seems to be working to bring down criminal activity.

The movie also gives a look at the intricate planning and training that goes into the perfectly timed burglaries our anti-heroes commit. While the almost titillating laser scenes, both training and the real thing, earned infamy among critics, they are fascinating to watch for the meticulous choreography, not just Zeta-Jones’ curvaceous figure. Also, though there are several potentially compromising situations, I appreciate that the two leads are never shown sleeping together, as in every other remotely romantic film.

The vertigo-inducing finale still keeps me and my VC on the edge of our seats, and the end is satisfying, if morally problematic. It’s a fine line that these films walk, making criminals likable to the point one wants them to prevail, but Entrapment does it well enough to warrant getting on the list.

Best line: (from Mac’s FBI contact) “Well, Mac, this looks like the end of a terrible friendship.”

VC’s best line: “Don’t use a cannon to kill a mosquito.”

 
Artistry: 5
Characters/Actors: 6
Entertainment: 6
Visual Effects: 5
Originality: 6
Watchability: 5
Other (“heroes” are criminals): -5
 
TOTAL: 28 out of 60
 

Tomorrow: #344: Working Girl

© 2014 S. G. Liput

Witness (1985)

15 Wednesday Jan 2014

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A small Amish lad by the name of Sam Lapp,
Whose father just died, walks right into a trap
When he visits the city, a vast place of gloom,
And witnesses murder while in the restroom.
He gets out unnoticed, and he and his mom
Meet an Officer Book, who insists they stay calm.
He wants Sam to identify who did the crime:
He finds out it’s a cop named McFee in no time.
 
When Book tells his boss Schaeffer of a drug scheme
McFee is behind, things are not what they seem.
Book is ambushed and wounded while toting some suits
And realizes Schaeffer must be in cahoots.
He takes Sam and Rachel (the mom), and they drive
To Amish farm country to keep them alive.
But Book, who was shot, is too injured to leave
So the Lapps take him in, though they’re shy to receive
This English outsider who carries a gun,
But they help him recover, which stuns everyone.
 
He slowly adapts to this rural lifestyle,
Though he calculates what next to do all the while.
He learns to wake up at 4:30 to milk,
He helps with barn raising and things of that ilk.
He grows close to Sam but to Rachel much closer,
And does she resist his romantic charm? No, sir.
She tries at first, yes, but the choice is quite hard.
Should she stay with the Amish or leave with her guard?
 
At last, Schaeffer finds them and storms the farmhouse.
Both Book and the bad guys then play cat-and-mouse.
He drowns one attacker in a silo of corn
And shoots McFee too, but then Schaeffer warns
That he has Rachel hostage. Though he threatens to end her,
Book triumphs by guilting the cop to surrender.
In the end, there is sadness and breaking of hearts
Because Rachel won’t leave, watching as Book departs.
__________________
 

Witness is a beautifully filmed love story that manages to mix excitement, romance, and a realistic fish-out-of-water tale into a movie that was obviously meant to garner multiple Oscar nominations (which it did, including Harrison Ford’s only Best Actor nomination for the role of John Book). It also made my mother hesitant to let me go alone to a public restroom when I was young.

My family briefly considered joining the Amish several years ago, and, while we decided their lifestyle is not for us, I have the deepest respect for their way of life. Witness does a good job of presenting the Amish lifestyle in a way that makes it seem quaint but not backwards, simply different from ours. The cinematography and direction are lovely, particularly the barn-raising scene midway through, and help to make up for a few boring moments.

As with Inkheart, though, the end just isn’t very satisfying, mainly because it muddles the film’s message. Either Rachel should have left the Amish to go with Book, showing that love can overcome any barrier, or she should have remained faithful to her beliefs, showing faith and normalcy were more important to her than a sinful relationship. But allowing Rachel to act on her temptations (we can assume from the passionate kissing scene in the field), but not enough to go all the way and leave, just messes it up. It may be “realistic” in not having such a question be black or white, but the way it is done makes it seem that she took a bite of cake and will now live in denial of ever wanting to have the rest. But that’s just me. The nude scene and the frequent (though comparatively restrained) language also take away from the film’s entertainment and moral value.

Best line: (a tourist, after Book says something very un-Amish to her) “Did you hear what that A-mish said to me?”

 
Artistry: 7
Characters/Actors: 7
Entertainment: 5
Visual Effects: 4
Originality: 5
Watchability: 4
Other (nudity and language): -5
 
TOTAL: 27 out of 60
 

Tomorrow: #350: 12 Angry Men

© 2014 S. G. Liput