Tag Archives: Dreamworks

How to Train Your Dragon (2010)

18 Friday Jul 2014

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Hiccup is a Viking lad
Upon the isle of Berk.
He cannot seem to please his dad
With his inventive work.
 
His father Stoick only cares
For hunting dragon pests,
But Hiccup is the worst of heirs,
As everyone attests.
 
He shoots a dragon from the sky,
A Night Fury, the worst,
But when he tries to watch it die,
His feelings are reversed.
 
He lets it live; it follows suit,
And cautious friendship grows.
He names the beast Toothless to boot,
And learns what no one knows.
 
Since half the dragon’s tail was torn,
It cannot fly away,
But Hiccup crafts prosthetics worn
Around its tail each day.
 
As he is trained with fellow teens
To fight each flying creature,
Astride his pet Hiccup careens,
With practice as his teacher.
 
With inside knowledge of the brutes,
He handles them with skill
And wows his dad and the recruits
And earns the right to kill.
 
A girl named Astrid follows him
And threatens to reveal,
But Toothless scares her on a whim
Yet proves he has appeal.
 
They find the hidden dragon nest,
Ruled by a giant beast,
And Hiccup sees they act the pest
Or else become its feast.
 
So Hiccup tries to prove his point
In front of his whole town,
But Hiccup’s efforts disappoint,
And Toothless is brought down.
 
His father stubbornly insists
To find the dragon nest,
And Toothless grudgingly assists
With Stoick’s killing quest.
 
Since Hiccup knows they cannot fight
That dragon monster thing,
He and his Viking friends take flight
On dragons they’re keeping.
 
The monstrous dragon is released,
And Stoick saves Toothless.
They all engage the mammoth beast,
And Hiccup’s acts impress.
 
He taunts the beast, astride his friend,
And brings it down with flair,
But very nearly meets his end
If not for Toothless there.
 
Though injured, Hiccup quickly mends,
And witnesses with glee
Dragons and Vikings can be friends
And live in harmony.
__________________
 

After the Madagascar movies, I began to not expect much from DreamWorks. Their focus on parody made them pale in comparison to the originality of Pixar, but How to Train Your Dragon was a welcome surprise. Boasting a 98% on Rotten Tomatoes, it’s awesome in both concept and execution. Based off of Cressida Cowell’s book series, the film combines rowdy Scottish-accented Vikings with various species of the legendary flying reptiles to create something exciting, touching, and just plain cool.

Jay Baruchel brings a geeky likability to Hiccup, and Gerard Butler deepens his voice and accent to give heft to Stoick the Vast. Other roles are filled decently by America Ferrera, Jonah Hill, Craig Ferguson, etc. The character I especially admire is Toothless, the Night Fury. I love how his behavior is often cat-like, and his scenes of flight are so exhilarating and beautiful that I wish I had one of my own.

As far as the story, there are some clichés, such as the overbearing, disappointed parent who doesn’t understand the more open-minded child (sounds like The Little Mermaid). The various teen stereotypes aren’t all that memorable, but their interactions in the entertaining training scenes are. There’s even the familiar he’s-dead-no-wait-never-mind cliché, though unlike other movies, Hiccup doesn’t escape completely unscathed, giving the loss more weight. Even with its action-oriented story, the film also extols inventiveness and the value of reading and, yes, open-mindedness.

John Powell’s fantastic Celtic-influenced score heightens the excitement and the fun; it’s probably my favorite score of all of DreamWorks’ animated films. My VC doesn’t much care for the film, considering the dragons to appear too cartoonish, but I think How to Train Your Dragon is DreamWorks Animation’s best film in years. I hope to see the sequel soon.

Best line: (Gobber, to Hiccup about his father) “Now, you’re thinkin’ about this all wrong. It’s not so much what you look like, it’s what’s inside that he can’t stand.”

 
Artistry: 6
Characters/Actors: 7
Entertainment: 9
Visual Effects: 9
Originality: 6
Watchability: 8
 
TOTAL: 45 out of 60
 

Next: #174 – Mulan

© 2014 S. G. Liput

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Joseph: King of Dreams (2000)

20 Sunday Apr 2014

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In Canaan, Jacob’s simply thrilled
To have his prayers at last fulfilled.
For barren Rachel’s borne a son,
A miracle to everyone.
 
As Joseph grows and sings in key,
He’s Jacob’s favorite, plain to see.
His ten half-brothers grow quite tired
Of the way he is admired.
 
He wears a coat of many hues
And flaunts his standing, in their views.
They’re also irked that it now seems
Their brother has prophetic dreams.
 
At last, they say they’ve had enough
And make a move that’s not a bluff.
They trap their brother in a cave
And sell him as a meager slave.
 
To Egypt, Joseph’s taken far
And sold again to Potiphar.
Through labor, he starts earning praise
And all his perseverance pays.
 
Now high within his master’s house,
He’s slandered by his master’s spouse
And thrown in jail in utter gloom,
A dark and rat-infested tomb.
 
He solves some fellow inmates’ dreams,
Interpreting their common themes.
He’s left alone for two years till
He comes to terms with his God’s will.
 
When Pharaoh has a dream as well,
He calls on Joseph from his cell.
His dream predicts some years of famine,
Spread from Egypt unto Ammon.
 
Pharaoh is indeed impressed,
And Joseph soon is heaven blessed.
As Pharaoh’s second-in-command,
He helps prepare the entire land.
 
When famine withers shoots and seeds,
All Egypt has the food it needs.
When Joseph’s brothers come for food,
He acts conspicuously rude.
 
He quickly locks up Simeon
Till they bring brother Benjamin.
They come back with his newest brother,
Born of Rachel, his dead mother.
 
A trick gets them at last to leak
Their crime, which they’ve been loath to speak.
Then Joseph says he’s their estranged
Half-brother, when he’s sure they’ve changed.
 
They beg forgiveness, which he gives,
And he is glad his father lives.
Then Jacob and his family
Move down to Egypt joyously.
___________________
 

Joseph: King of Dreams is a prequel to DreamWorks Animation’s The Prince of Egypt but skipped theaters and was released directly to video, the only animated DreamWorks film to do so. Though the story of Joseph had been done as a musical before with Andrew Lloyd Webber’s pretty good adaptation Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, this animated film is much closer to the spirit of the Biblical story, as the opening disclaimer tries to convey. Some creative license was taken, such as removing Leah from the picture to avoid the depiction of Jacob having two concurrent wives, but Joseph: King of Dreams is a wonderful introduction to the Biblical story for all young viewers.

The animation and music are all right but do not measure up to the masterpiece that DreamWorks pulled off with Prince of Egypt, and I bet the filmmakers knew that; hence, its direct-to-video status. Many of the songs are catchy while you hear them but aren’t as memorable as they try to be, but the best ones are the opener “Miracle Child” and “Better Than I,” a very Christian song beautifully recounting Joseph’s memories while in captivity (though, can a tree really grow that much in two years?). While the voice acting was never advertised much upon release, it does feature Ben Affleck as Joseph, Mark Hamill as Judah, and Richard Herd as Jacob, among various other known and obscure voice actors.

It’s always enjoyable to see a well-produced adaptation of a Bible story since so many are obviously low-budget affairs. At the same time, there’s a danger of departing too far from the source material in order to build characters or tension (a la the recent Noah); Joseph: King of Dreams is an admirable Biblical movie that remains faithful to the text, telling a timeless story for all ages and audiences.

Best line: (lyrics in the song speaking of God while Joseph is imprisoned) “You know better than I.”

 
Artistry: 6
Characters/Actors: 5
Entertainment: 7
Visual Effects: 5
Originality: 5
Watchability: 7
 
TOTAL: 35 out of 60
 

Next: #260 – Galaxy Quest

© 2014 S. G. Liput

 

Puss in Boots (2011)

30 Sunday Mar 2014

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This legend of the Puss in Boots,
Who some may know from Shrek,
Is of a lover and outlaw
Who’s on a lengthy trek.
 
He hears the tale of magic beans
That Jack and Jill will use
To grow and climb the famed beanstalk
And steal the Golden Goose.
 
He tries to steal them from the pair
Of outlaws. Nonetheless,
Another skillful cat with boots
Prevents him from success.
 
They fight with dancing and with swords,
But Puss is shocked to find
He fought one Kitty Softpaws, who
Can swiftly steal him blind.
 
He learns she works for Humpty Dumpty,
Quite a crooked egg,
Who wants his help to steal the beans
And isn’t shy to beg.
 
Puss then tells Kitty of his past:
The egg and he were pals,
Two orphans seeking magic beans
To boost their low morales.
 
Puss was the toast of San Ricardo,
Future looking bright,
But Humpty tricked him into helping
Rob the bank one night.
 
So Puss abandoned him to jail
And has been running since.
The two get Puss to help their plan,
Though he’s hard to convince.
 
They snatch the beans from Jack and Jill
And fly where Humpty knows
They’ll sprout into the tall beanstalk
And up, up, up it grows.
 
They find a golden gosling, plus
A giant unseen beast,
And take the goose back down to earth,
Their fortunes now increased.
 
But Jack and Jill attack that night
And leave Puss all alone.
He follows them to San Ricardo,
Where the truth’s made known.
 
It all so far was Humpty’s plan
For vengeance on his friend,
And everyone from Jack and Jill
To Kitty helped pretend.
 
While Puss in Boots is locked away,
The city celebrates,
For Humpty’s bought it with the gold
The giant goose creates.
 
The goose’s even bigger mom
Attacks, as Humpty’d planned,
But Puss convinces his old friend
To help him save the land.
 
Reuniting mom and child,
Humpty’s death’s implied.
He plummets from the city bridge,
Revealing gold inside.
 
Once San Ricardo’s safe and sound,
Puss gains respect once more.
Though wanted still, both he and Kitty
Seek their next big score.
__________________
 

The Shrek universe got a welcome addition in 2011’s Puss in Boots. It already had a number of memorable characters, such as Donkey, Fiona, Gingy, Prince Charming, and so on, but none deserved their own film like the big-eyed feline that stole the show in Shrek 2. Puss in Boots is an imaginative origin story that plays up the similarity between Puss and Antonio Banderas’s role as Zorro. The Hispanic tone makes the setting feel a little more like the real world, even though no one is surprised at talking feline outlaws or anthropomorphic eggs.

Several more interesting characters are introduced, from the conflicted Humpty Dumpty to the sultry love interest Kitty Softpaws, played by Zach Galifianakis and Salma Hayek, respectively. Billy Bob Thornton and Amy Sedaris are also memorable as the pig-loving ruthless killers Jack and Jill. The animation is also marvelous, and the story itself is much more original, intricate, and entertaining than the awful Shrek the Third. Plus, it’s very funny with a number of jokes intended for adults, including a Fight Club reference and even a drug joke.

While there’s nothing really objectionable, I can’t help but feel that the story gets a bit too weird in its imagination. The filmmakers at times fracture the fairytale to the breaking point, so to speak, turning the giant’s castle into a humongous lost world, the Golden Goose into Godzilla, Little Boy Blue into a literal blue-skinned boy, and Jack and Jill into evil hillbillies. Sometimes, the action becomes so frenetic that a blink can cause you to miss something. Still, combining Humpty Dumpty with the Goose that lays the golden eggs was inspired, even if his ultimate fate is rather open-ended.

Also, the ending is good for this film, but it’s unclear how it ties into Shrek 2. In some ways, Puss in Boots is akin to Prometheus, offering a prequel of sorts that can stand alone but doesn’t connect with the next installment quite the way we would expect. What happened to Kitty Softpaws? How did Puss end up in Far Far Away where the king found him? Perhaps DreamWorks is planning a Puss in Boots 2 to answer questions like these.

Best line: (Puss in Boots, leaving his latest conquest) “I will never forget you… Margherita.” (annoyed cat meows) “I mean, Rosa.”

 
Artistry: 5
Characters/Actors: 7
Entertainment: 7
Visual Effects: 8
Originality: 7
Watchability: 6
Other (some weirdness and unanswered questions): -7
 
TOTAL: 33 out of 60
 

Next: #282: Fireproof

© 2014 S. G. Liput

 

Kung Fu Panda 2 (2011)

25 Tuesday Mar 2014

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Within a brief prologue, a proud peacock prince
Turns to the dark side and kills pandas since
A goat has foretold one will bring down this Shen.
Though banished, Shen plots to return once again.
 
The fat panda Po and the Furious Five
Are doing quite well till a wolf pack arrives.
They’re gathering metal and quickly escape
While Po is distracted by some random shape.
 
The band of kung fu-ers soon learn a large town
Was captured with weapons that brought masters down.
They find there that Shen and his wolves have moved in;
A firework cannon has helped them to win.
 
They’re captured at once when the wolves all step in
But break free, destroying the peacock’s weapon.
Yet Shen has built many and shows off their power
By toppling down his own ancestral tower.
 
Our heroes get out by all working together,
But Po is disturbed by the shapes on Shen’s feather.
Small flashbacks suggest that when Shen turned bad
Was the last time that Po saw his real mom or dad.
 
His friends want him safe so they leave behind Po,
Who needs to know what happened so long ago.
When Po confronts Shen, disobeying his team,
He’s shot by Shen’s cannon and falls in a stream.
 
Surviving, he’s helped by the goat to recall
That night when so many poor pandas did fall.
His mother hid him but was murdered by Shen;
His goose “father” found and adopted him then.
 
Thus coming to terms with his turbulent past,
Po goes to stop Shen, whose strength’s growing fast.
Po battles Shen’s ships and releases the Five,
And Shen doesn’t care if his own troops survive.
 
He launches the cannon, and none can deflect it,
But Po’s inner peace helps him redirect it.
He offers this peace to his foe, standing tall,
But Shen’s thirst for vengeance begets his downfall.
 
When Po and his friends return home once they’ve won,
He tells his goose dad he’ll always be his son.
But far, far away from both Po and the Five,
The panda’s real father can sense he’s alive.
_______________________
 

Not all of DreamWorks’s films have deserved sequels. Shark Tale, Bee Movie, Monsters vs. Aliens, and Megamind certainly did not, and I personally don’t think Madagascar warranted a trilogy, plus an upcoming movie centered on the Penguins. Yet Kung Fu Panda held promise and untapped questions that could be further explored in future films, the most obvious being “Why is Po’s father a goose?”

The tragic answer to that question, which Kung Fu Panda 2 provides, gives the film much more heart than its predecessor. While the first movie had some minor awww-worthy character development surrounding Shifu’s relationship with Tai Lung and Tigress, the pathos was relegated to pretty much one scene, with the rest of the film busy with humor, action, training, worrying, lesson learning, and the like. In Kung Fu Panda 2, the emotions take center stage as an integral part of the plot and the history of both Po and Shen. I like how the Furious Five have clearly warmed up to the chubby panda, even if they remain underdeveloped as characters. Yet the scene in which Po’s mother leaves him and lures away the wolves blows away anything in the first film, and the poignant exchanges between Po and his goose father should touch anyone, whether they have a connection with adoption or not.

All that is to say that this sequel has pretty much all the same ingredients as the first one: an all-star cast, a mix of animation styles, some funny lines, awkward moments, thrilling action set pieces (I particularly love the collapse of the giant pagoda), and another great villain (gleefully voiced by Gary Oldman). But the moments of sentiment are what make it a better film, in my opinion. Here’s looking forward to Kung Fu Panda 3 (and the much closer How to Train Your Dragon 2).

Best line: (the goat soothsayer, speaking to Po and anyone with a less-than-ideal childhood) “Your story may not have such a happy beginning, but that doesn’t make you who you are. It is the rest of your story, who you choose to be.”

 
Artistry: 6
Characters/Actors: 7
Entertainment: 7
Visual Effects: 7
Originality: 6
Watchability: 6
Other (I just like other films better): -7
 
TOTAL: 32 out of 60
 

Next: #287: Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines

© 2014 S. G. Liput

 

Kung Fu Panda (2008)

23 Sunday Mar 2014

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A corpulent panda named Po likes to dream
Of joining the fabulous martial arts team,
The Furious Five, who include Crane and Monkey,
Viper and Mantis and Tigress. But chunky
Young Po knows that they are way out of his league:
A noodle shop job is enough to fatigue.
 
His “father,” a goose, doesn’t know Po’s desire,
And so he is shocked when he sees Po conspire
To see the foretold Dragon Warrior named.
They’re all thunderstruck when it’s Po who’s proclaimed.
Great Master Shifu is not happy one bit
And does all he can to convince Po to quit.
 
But Po endures lots of ferocious abuse
And takes it in stride as the pain is let loose.
But Tai Lung, a pupil that Shifu did fail,
Who’s greedy for power, has broken from jail,
So Shifu then follows his master’s advice
And trains Po much better by using his vice.
 
With dumplings and soup, Po improves his kung fu,
And Shifu’s impressed at what pandas can do.
Po’s heroes run off ere their foe can arrive,
But Tai Lung defeats the famed Furious Five.
Po doubts he can win; Tai Lung’s out of control,
And Po gets little help from the blank Dragon Scroll.
 
When Tai Lung arrives, he beats Shifu to pulp,
But Po calls him out with an uneasy gulp.
Their fight gives Tai Lung the best part of abuse,
And Po puts his overweight flab to good use.
Defeating Tai Lung with a move few can do,
The new Dragon Warrior proves his kung fu.
______________________
 

Kung Fu Panda is an exciting homage to the Chinese wuxia genre with lots of fighting and humor and one big panda. When the film first came out, I wasn’t interested in the least, as has been the case with several CGI movies of late, but, once I gave it a chance when it came on television, I was favorably impressed. Quite a few famous actors lend their voices to DreamWorks’s characters, and, though most aren’t given much to say, Jack Black as Po, Dustin Hoffman as Master Shifu, and Ian McShane as Tai Lung are certainly the most well-cast roles. Jack Black’s fanboy enthusiasm alternates between hilarious and annoying, but he makes Po endearing overall. The film also has some lovely animation, though I don’t care for some of the character designs and did not find the animation as stunning as many critics hailed.

The main draw for me, though, is the action. I haven’t seen many martial arts films, but some of the choreographed fights in this movie took my breath away. It all gets a bit repetitive by the end, particularly with the overuse of slow-motion shots, but Tai Lung’s rope bridge fight with the Furious Five and especially the villain’s jailbreak are among the best animated action sequences, in my opinion.

While there’s some “kung fu-ey” mysticism and the end has a hackneyed “believe in yourself” lesson, Po’s zealous perseverance in the midst of difficulty is admirable, and Shifu’s relationship with Tai Lung manages to evoke some pathos as well. Kung Fu Panda succeeds in combining laughs and thrills in an entertaining way that has made it one of DreamWorks Animation’s most successful franchises.

Best line: (Shifu, as Po is doing this) “Panda, we do not wash our pits in the Pool of Sacred Tears.”

 
Artistry: 6
Characters/Actors: 6
Entertainment: 7
Visual Effects: 7
Originality: 4
Watchability: 6
Other (some awkward, less-than-funny scenes): -4
 
TOTAL: 32 out of 60
 

Next: #288: Kung Fu Panda 2 (yep)

© 2014 S. G. Liput

 

Sinbad: Legend of the Seven Seas (2003)

19 Wednesday Mar 2014

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Sinbad the sailor’s a scoundrel at heart,
Or so goddess Eris may think.
This villainous goddess has chaos to start
And sends a beast into the drink.
 
As Sinbad is robbing an old but dear friend
Named Proteus, parted for years,
He finds he must help his old chum to defend
‘Gainst a tentacled fiend that appears.
 
They dispose of the monster, but Sinbad is swept
From the ship, so that Eris can pitch
An offer to him he can’t help but accept:
Steal a book and she’ll make the rogue rich.
 
In Syracuse, Proteus unloads the book
That brings peace to the cities around.
But sly Eris frames the notorious crook,
And leaves the whole kingdom unsound.
 
They all accuse Sinbad, but Proteus asks
That he stay while Sinbad finds the book.
The thief at first balks at this hardest of tasks,
But he leaves since he’s now off the hook.
 
Marina, Prince Proteus’s fiancée,
Stows away to ensure Sinbad goes.
A bribe proves enough to allow her to stay,
But they don’t like each other (it shows).
 
But, when Eris sends several Sirens to sing,
Who bewitch both the thief and his crew,
Marina takes over to narrowly bring
The ship and its company through.
 
They next hook a line to an island-sized fish,
Which gives them a turbulent ride.
Marina then almost becomes the main dish
For a giant bird Eris supplied.
 
Once Sinbad saves her, they all sail for a star,
And he unveils his love for the girl.
As they near Tartarus after coming so far,
They sail off the edge of the world.
 
Marina and Sinbad swing to Eris’ realm,
A lost kingdom of ruin and death.
Meanwhile, his faithful first mate takes the helm,
And everyone’s holding their breath.
 
In Tartarus, Eris taunts Sinbad to lie
And say he’ll return when he won’t.
He swears, book or no, that he’ll go back to die.
They try to retrieve it but don’t.
 
At the moment when Proteus thinks he’ll be slain,
Sinbad comes back to him just in time.
He is empty-handed; the trip was in vain,
But he’s there to be killed for his “crime.”
 
Yet Eris had sworn that, if he said what’s true,
He’d then have the book that she took.
His promise was genuine; he followed through,
So she grudgingly gives him the book.
 
His name somewhat cleared, Sinbad plans to depart,
And Marina is silently sad.
Yet Proteus tells her to follow her heart
So she voyages off with Sinbad.
__________________
 

Sinbad: Legend of the Seven Seas is both a homage to the ancient Arab tales (and the old movie featuring the character) and a thrill ride that is sure to buckle anyone’s swash. With some of the best action set pieces involving traditional animation, Sinbad seems like a precursor and inspiration for the Pirates of the Caribbean sequels. While Curse of the Black Pearl came out the same year as this DreamWorks film and shares the hero/thief dichotomy of the main character, the other three seem to borrow key scenes from Sinbad. The attacks of the Kraken in Dead Man’s Chest are similar to Cetus’ assault at the beginning, the edge of the world scene in At World’s End seems directly borrowed from this film (complete with the characters who continue on finding themselves suddenly in a desert with the remains of a ship), and the vampiric mermaids of On Stranger Tides are akin to the Sirens. The other action scenes may not have direct comparisons but are still just as thrilling, such as their escape from the giant roc.

Another similarity is the fact that, while Sinbad and Jack Sparrow are both murderous thieves when you get right down to it, the films aren’t actually about them doing the despicable acts that have earned them infamy in the movie’s world. This allows the film to redeem these characters in a way that makes them heroic, even if they probably continue their old lifestyles after the film’s events.

The adventuresome Harry Gregson-Williams score is perfect, though it’s got nothing on Hans Zimmer’s classic theme for Pirates. The animation, again a mixture of hand-drawn animation for the characters and CGI for the giant creatures, is quite good as well and extremely fluid, such as Eris’ ethereal comings and goings. The voice acting is also top-notch, and it remains the only Brad Pitt film my VC can bring herself to watch, mainly because Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michelle Pfeifer do so well in their respective roles. As the last of DreamWorks’s traditionally animated films, Sinbad offers some great action and a predictable but nicely developed romance, and I think it deserved a sequel. I like many of DreamWorks Animation’s CGI films, but it’s a shame that wonderful hand-drawn films like this have nearly gone extinct in the U.S.

Best line: (Marina, while hiding from the roc after Sinbad pulls out a single knife) “Great, he can pick his teeth when he’s done with us.” (Sinbad) “Yeah, you see, in the hands of an expert, a good knife has 1,001 good uses.” (Sinbad then proves his lack of expertise.)

 
Artistry: 4
Characters/Actors: 6
Entertainment: 8
Visual Effects: 8
Originality: 6
Watchability: 6
Other (I just like other films better): -6
 
TOTAL: 32 out of 60
 

Next: #292: The Impossible

© 2014 S. G. Liput

 

The Road to El Dorado (2000)

12 Wednesday Feb 2014

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El Dorado is a city made, they say, of solid gold.
1519 is the year in which these escapades unfold,
In which two crooks make a journey to the New World from the Old.
 
Winning bets with loaded dice, Miguel and Tulio scam a map
Of the wonders of the New World from a less than pleasant chap.
When their cheating is discovered, they escape…into a trap.
 
Captives on Cortés’s vessel, they are baffled for a while,
Till Cortés’s horse Altivo lets them out in clever style.
All three end up in a lifeboat, floating mile after mile.
 
When they reach the New World’s beaches (with the map still close at hand),
They go on a grand adventure through this new, exotic land,
And they locate El Dorado, though not quite as they had planned.
 
They are taken to the city by the natives through a cave
And mistaken for two deities, omnipotent and brave,
So they play along and act as they think gods perhaps behave.
 
Chel, a native girl who’s willing to share all she knows about,
Sees the two are only faking, but agrees to help them out
If they also take her with them on their quick departure route.
 
Tannabok, the friendly chief, provides festivities that night,
While a priest named Tzekel-Kan thinks gods desire a bloody rite,
And his only wish is sacrificing everyone in sight.
 
Tulio just wants to lie low, but not so with brash Miguel.
He runs off into the city to have fun and thinks it’s swell,
While his partner Tulio begins to fall in love with Chel.
 
When an armadillo helps them win a hip-ball kind of sport,
Tzekel-Kan sees through their subterfuge and cuts their party short
By attacking with a giant metal jaguar of some sort.
 
Once he’s fallen in a whirlpool and has found Cortés to praise,
Our two heroes disagree and choose to go their separate ways.
Tulio decides to leave with Chel; his former buddy stays.
 
News arrives that Tzekel-Kan is guiding that conquistador
To the city, so the duo quickly gain back their rapport.
They want nobody to threaten El Dorado anymore.
 
So they sacrifice their gold and all the servants and the praise,
And they lock out Tzekel-Kan, Cortés, and all their violent ways,
And our heroes ride away to find another trail to blaze.
_______________________________
 

The Road to El Dorado is a musical adventure that attempts to be another Tarzan or Prince of Egypt, with some good music, exciting action, and some more mature content than most cartoons, but only halfway succeeds. It follows Tarzan’s example in having most of the Elton John/Tim Rice songs being sung by a singing narrator and only one number actually sung by the characters. While these songs are fun and enjoyable, they all end up sounding similar and don’t have the distinct memorableness of the artists’ work in The Lion King. Still, they clarify the mood for many scenes and complement the lively and colorful animation, which is almost as good as in the much more acclaimed The Prince of Egypt. The real pleasure of the film is in the two leads. Kenneth Branagh as Miguel and Kevin Kline as Tulio play off each other so well and their voices and unique inflections so fit their characters that the movie would suffer without them. They make some already humorous lines hilarious and turn the film into a “Road” movie worthy of Bob Hope and Bing Crosby’s classics.

While many reviewers objected to the weak plot and secondary characters, I take issue with its rewriting of history. The film presents the natives of El Dorado, who I can only assume are Aztecs, as peace-loving folk under the tyranny of a single bloodthirsty high priest. It lightly references the ritual killings of thousands of innocents and totally ignores the hostile lifestyle of the real Aztecs, who actively captured victims from neighboring areas for their sacrifices. Not to mention, there are some obvious flaws, such as Chel’s New York-ish accent, the isolated El Doradoans somehow speaking the same language as the visiting Spaniards, or the existence of a map to a legendary city that has supposedly never been discovered. Despite these weaknesses, The Road to El Dorado is another fun family film that, like many of the animated movies on the list lately, deserved a better box office turnout than it received.

Best line: (Tulio to Miguel) “The little voice, remember? Just imagine for a moment that you have one. Now, what would it be saying about Chel?”  (Miguel) “Um…” [he purrs romantically]

VC’s best line: (Tulio) “Your horse bit me in the butt!” (said as only Kevin Kline could say it)

 
Artistry: 4
Characters/Actors: 6
Entertainment: 6
Visual Effects: 6
Originality: 5
Watchability: 5
Other (aforementioned flaws): -2
 
TOTAL: 30 out of 60
 

Tomorrow: #322: Ice Age

© 2014 S. G. Liput

 

Rise of the Guardians (2012)

09 Sunday Feb 2014

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On a frigid winter’s night,
A boy arises from the ice.
He can’t remember anything,
But he can fly without a wing
And play with ice, but at a price:
No one sees him or his plight.
 
Years go by, and poor Jack Frost,
Who has not gained his memory back,
Causes blizzards, ice, and snow.
None believe in Jack Frost, though.
One day, Jack’s thrown in a sack,
And, through a portal, he is tossed.
 
Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy,
Easter Bunny and Sandman,
The Guardians of Childhood,
Protecting kids both bad and good,
Have summoned Jack to help their plan
And join their group so legendary.
 
The Boogeyman, Pitch Black’s returned
To threaten children everywhere.
The Moon has chosen Jack to be
A Guardian, surprisingly.
Jack doesn’t care for such fanfare
And tells them all he’s unconcerned.
 
Nonetheless, Jack tags along
When Tooth is raided by bad dreams
That Pitch has sent, so that the sprite
Cannot fulfill her rounds that night.
As morning gleams, to kids it seems
Their hopes for fairy gifts were wrong.
 
Tooth reveals kids’ memories
Are hidden in their pearly whites.
So Jack thinks, if they stop Pitch fast,
The teeth he stole will show Jack’s past.
The latter night, the whole team fights
To gather teeth, which one boy sees.
 
The Sandman falls to Pitch’s blade,
And, though they all help to prepare
For Easter, Pitch beguiles Jack
By giving him his ivories back,
And fills the hare with great despair
By crushing all the eggs he made.
 
Children round the world begin
To think our heroes are not real.
Their powers fade as Pitch’s grow,
And they cannot defeat the foe.
Pitch seals the deal with evil zeal,
Finds a hole, and drops Jack in.
 
There Jack opens up his tooth
And sees his boyhood way back when.
He fell and drowned beneath the lake,
For his fretting sister’s sake,
He saved her then, can save again,
And learns his purpose with this truth.
 
Helping children not to grieve,
The Guardian’s efforts start to pay.
Sandman returns to beat up Pitch,
On whom the tables start to switch.
His fears that day drag him away,
And all the kids can now believe.
_______________________
 

Another box-office disappointment on the list, Rise of the Guardians turns the most beloved characters of childhood imagination into a legendary A-Team. The CGI animation and voice acting are excellent, and the filmmaker’s own imaginations run wild with clever concepts applied to explain the “secrets” of these mythical Guardians. Such innovations include an army of hummingbird-like fairies to gather teeth for the Tooth Fairy, wormhole-producing snow globes to justify Santa’s one-night travel around the earth, and magical “tunnels” summoned by the Easter Bunny as if he had an Aperture portal gun. All these concepts and the fantastical worlds of the various characters are introduced at such a rapid pace most of the film just washes over the viewer, creating a sense of wonder, the obvious goal of the entire film.

I’ll admit that, for the most part, the climax seems to repeat what came before, and, by then, the prolonged scenes of “wonder” start to drag. After the poignant revelation of Jack’s tragic backstory, the action and wonder seem recycled from previous scenes, with the exception of Pitch being dragged to hell(?), a la Ghost. It also falls prey to a cliché I notice in a lot of movies, particularly animated ones: the he’s-dead-no-wait-never-mind conceit involving the Sandman. The most glaring fault, though, is that it completely ignores the true meaning of Easter and Christmas, mentioning “hope” and little else. Granted, the Man in the Moon stands in for God in many scenes and this is a secular film, but it seemed obvious that the filmmakers were trying to step around that elephant in the room.

Though the Tooth Fairy fares best in this regard, Rise of the Guardians creates a version of these characters, not the iconic version that it might have been. Still, with some funny lines, impressive animation, and that all-important foundation of wonder, it’s a worthy family film that should have performed better in theaters than it did.

Best line: (Santa) “Merry Christmas!”  (Easter Bunny) “Happy Easter!”  (Tooth Fairy) “And don’t forget to floss!”

 
Artistry: 5
Characters/Actors: 5
Entertainment: 5
Visual Effects: 9
Originality: 4
Watchability: 5
Other (ending drags) -4
 
TOTAL: 29 out of 60
 

Tomorrow: #325: Doctor Dolittle (1967)

© 2014 S. G. Liput

Monsters vs. Aliens (2009)

25 Saturday Jan 2014

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Susan assumes that her future is bright.
Her wedding tomorrow can’t help but excite.
Her Derek, a weatherman, is a delight,
And they’re going to Paris, the City of Light.
But then her friends scare her midway through the night,
And then Derek proves that he’s not such a knight.
She’s eager for Paris, but Derek says, “No,”
He would much rather go for a job in Fresno.
 
But Susan supports him, not wanting to fight.
Despite that, the day is still going all right.
But then she gets crushed by a meteorite,
And then Susan glows and grows to a great height,
And then she gives everyone quite a bad fright
And then several SWAT teams have her in their sight.
The government drops her and takes her away,
Effectively ruining her wedding day.
 
She wakes up in some secret government base,
And meets several monsters, confined in disgrace.
The strange Missing Link, who assumes he’s an ace,
A mad scientist with a cockroach’s face,
A blob and a giant have lived in this place
For years, for they frighten the whole human race.
A General Monger explains to poor Sue
She’s a monster and now she must stay out of view.
 
A tentacled alien named Gallaxhar
Detects some Quantonium close to our star.
He sends out a robot to Earth (since it’s far),
Which freaks out the world, from Brazil to Qatar.
But Monger puts forth a suggestion bizarre:
Let monsters fight E.T. and beat out its tar.
So all of the monsters are quickly sent in,
And, main thanks to Susan, they do somehow win.
 
Now having been freed, Susan locates the man
Who loves her, but Derek’s no longer a fan.
Her growing so large was not part of his plan,
So the wedding and all he is now quick to can.
Soon Susan realizes she’s done much more than
She ever would have with Derek’s whole “plan.”
But then Gallaxhar abducts Susan (the cur!).
He wants the Quantonium, which is in her.
 
She’s drained till she’s small, like before she had grown.
Gallaxhar can now mass-produce many a clone
To conquer the earth and to make it his own.
The three smaller monsters, however, are flown
To his ship, and, to clones, all of them are unknown.
So they blend in and rescue poor Susan, who’s prone
To just getting pummeled by energized stone.
Again, height and strength the Quantonium lends,
But, this time, she wants it to rescue her friends.
 
The spaceship explodes with a wonderful blast,
And the monsters are welcomed as heroes at last.
Now Derek hopes Sue won’t remember the past
And will grant him an interview, but not so fast:
His wheedling ways she has gladly surpassed;
She prefers her new life, though it’s such a contrast.
When Paris needs saving, they all fly away,
For monsters have proved they can now save the day.
___________________
 

Monsters vs. Aliens is straight-up parody, lampooning science fiction and B-movies from the 1950s and beyond. With an outlandish plot and silly characters, it’s a film meant for moviegoers with a sense of humor. It sends up everything from Starman to The Fly to the Godzilla movies and probably several films I’ve never even seen. Despite the multitude of spoofs piling up so quickly, Monsters vs. Aliens nevertheless manages to create a decent plot with any holes safely patched with another joke.

Unfortunately, it also falls into the same trend as television cartoons like The Simpsons and The Fairly OddParents, which paint nearly every character as a jerk or an idiot. Except for Susan, almost everyone, particularly men (from the President on down), are sissies, dimwits, or pinheads who are generally unsympathetic. I know that herein lies much of the humor, but it’s a trap that other comedies often avoid.

Still, it’s definitely funny, from spoofing the constant screaming in B-movies to playing the theme to Beverly Hills Cop for the alien probe, a la Close Encounters. Also, unlike Megamind, which had few memorable scenes, several action set pieces stand out, such as the destruction of the Golden Gate Bridge and the explosion of Gallaxhar’s ship. Though the character development is lacking (compared with other Dreamworks films like Megamind), the humor shines and earns Monsters vs. Aliens a place on my list.

Best line: (General W. R. Monger, speaking of Area 51) “This place is an X-file, wrapped in a cover-up and deep-fried in a paranoid conspiracy.”

 
Artistry: 2
Characters/Actors: 3
Entertainment: 7
Visual Effects: 6
Originality: 5
Watchability: 5
 
TOTAL: 28 out of 60
 

Tomorrow: #340: Flightplan

© 2014 S. G. Liput

Megamind (2010)

05 Sunday Jan 2014

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Megamind and Metro Man are aliens (from space),
Who are sent to Earth as babies so to join the human race,
Since their planets were demolished and their parents had the plan
Thus to save their little children (sounds a lot like Superman).
Metro Man’s a hero, since he lands in wealth and ease,
While jailbirds raise the other and pass on their expertise.
Megamind, head blue and swollen with a giant intellect,
Grows into a super-villain (what else would one expect?).
They face off time and time again, the hero and the sinner,
And, despite the latter’s brilliant mind, good always is the winner.
 
Until one day when evil wins (?!) and Metro Man is slain,
And Megamind (with sidekick Minion) celebrates his brain.
They cause some damage, wreak some havoc, but, when all is done,
Megamind feels strangely empty; by itself, bad isn’t fun.
He resolves to make a hero who can fill the empty void
And can bring him back the rivalry he always had enjoyed.
By accident, he gives the powers of his former foe
To Hal, a nerdy cameraman, and tells him what to know.
But the villain has a soft spot for one Roxanne Ritchi too,
A reporter who might like him if he wasn’t bad and blue.
 
Since Hal (who’s nicknamed Titan) is now someone not to pity,
He turns bad and lords his power over helpless Metro City.
It turns out Metro Man had faked his death some clever way.
He insists that he’s retired now and will not save the day.
It’s up to Megamind to prove, regardless of the past,
He can be more than a villain, yes, a hero at long last.
The day is saved, and Megamind gives hero work a whirl.
For the first time, he’s victorious and finally gets the girl.
 
____
 

I was pretty skeptical about Megamind since it was released without much fanfare, and the trailers didn’t look all that interesting. Still, having seen it twice now, it’s a much better movie than I had expected so it’s a shame it came and went so quickly. My VC was also pleasantly surprised since she wasn’t very keen on seeing it at all.

Granted, it isn’t Dreamworks’ best work, with characters and situations that, while humorous, aren’t really laugh-out-loud funny. Also, none of the action scenes really stick out as being noteworthy, aside from the impressive flinging of an entire tower.

Nevertheless, with decent animation, a catchy soundtrack aimed more at the parents than the kids, a wonderful voice cast (though I have no love for Will Ferrell, nor does my VC for Brad Pitt), and a pretty good moral (growing beyond how you were raised and who you thought you had to be), it’s certainly list-worthy.

Best line:  “What’s the good of being bad when there’s no one good to stop you?”

Artistry – 3
Characters/Actors – 4
Entertainment – 5
Visual Effects – 4
Originality – 5
Watchability – 5
 
TOTAL:  26 out of 60
 

Tomorrow:  #360 – Eragon

© 2014 S. G. Liput