Franchises and ruins share at least one thing in common,
And no, it’s not that both attest to how the best declined.
Whether we discuss the MCU or Tutankhamen,
It’s that they both give hope to those in search of more to find.

For ardent archaeologists, they know there’s always more,
Beneath the dirt, untapped, covert, and waiting to be found.
Likewise, the nerds of fandom herds will pray as they explore,
That patience be rewarded if they simply stick around.

While one digs in the future and the other in the past,
They live for tiny victories, discoveries to tout.
They can’t all be an ancient tomb or Endgame unsurpassed;
Sometimes it’s just a broken bust they can’t do much about.
________________________

MPA rating: PG-13

I realize my output has slowed of late, but, despite struggling with my writing schedule, I have not forgotten this blog. Besides, it’s not like I’m taking fifteen-year breaks between entries like a certain Harrison Ford series. Anyway, as my past reviews and rankings might indicate, I am pretty forgiving when it comes to franchise films that others lambaste. I still like Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull more than anyone I know, and I can find plenty to enjoy from the supposed worst of Star Wars and the MCU. So I welcomed one final installment in the Indiana Jones franchise; Crystal Skull did have its issues, so perhaps one last adventure could end Indy’s cinematic journey on a high note. But though Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny has some bright spots, it was more of a letdown than even I was expecting.

Set mostly in 1969, this truly final adventure for Indiana Jones involves the crotchety archaeologist being pulled into another race for a potentially magical Macguffin, pursued by a former Nazi scientist (the ever reliably villainous Mads Mikkelsen) and his CIA accomplices, as well as Indy’s goddaughter Helena Shaw (Phoebe Waller-Bridge) with unscrupulous motives of her own. The titular Dial of Destiny is the Antikythera mechanism, an actual ancient Greek artifact with gears that could predict astronomical events, though here it’s a simpler device with two halves that are believed to map time instead.

Say what you will about Crystal Skull but it did at least give Indy a happy ending with a son and marriage, and I do take issue with sequels like this that justify their existence by doing away with all that to make the main character miserable at the start. Nevertheless, director James Mangold proves to be a surprisingly effective stand-in for Spielberg, bringing a great sense of fun and adventure to the film’s opening sequence. It’s an extended chase back in 1944 with a perfectly de-aged Indy back in his Nazi-thwarting prime alongside his timid friend Basil (Toby Jones), Helena’s father. If the whole film had been as good as the opening, it would be a hit recalling the franchise at its best. It’s just not the same once we jump to older Indy at his glum retirement party.

I will give credit to the fast pacing that never lets too much time go by without a chase or a tense stand-off. One extended pursuit is a hoot as Indy, Helena, her young sidekick Teddy (Ethann Isidore), the bad guys, and vengeful mobsters all chase each other through the narrow streets of Tangier. I also appreciated some welcome cameos, including John Rhys-Davies returning as Sallah and Antonio Banderas as another old friend who helps with a Mediterranean dive. With all the action, it does take some suspension of disbelief to accept the now-octogenarian Ford’s ability to keep up. He doesn’t engage in the old-fashioned fisticuffs as much, but he still jumps from vehicles, climbs cliffs, endures injury, and falls out of planes with the best of them (or at least his body double does).

Despite the caveats above, I was still enjoying Dial of Destiny for the most part and was prepared to defend it against naysayers up until the ending. Obviously, I won’t spoil it, but it takes a supernatural turn that was hard to accept, with an unsatisfying villain defeat due to their own dumb decisions and a climax of historical passion that I just didn’t buy. It’s not the worst thing ever, but it felt like the first draft of a finale rather than the finished product, a neat idea that should have gone back to the drawing board. I was sort of hoping the time travel element might wrap back around to the opening sequence a la Back to the Future Part II, but I suppose that would be too supernatural. I was also underwhelmed by Helena’s character; Waller-Bridge has a winking charisma that’s easily likable, but her ideals are in direct opposition with Indy’s (complete with a smug barb about capitalism). Though they bond a bit, it’s not clear how much moral growth, if any, she’s had by the end.

I so wanted to like Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny, but this is a case where I can agree with the disgruntled crowd. I would still watch it again for its good moments proving the effort that went into making this a worthy sequel and the simple fact that I love Ford in the lead role. It didn’t deserve to be the massive financial bomb it was, but sadly it’s a prime example of ending a franchise with a whimper rather than a bang.

Best line: (Indiana Jones) “I don’t believe in magic, but a few times in my life, I’ve seen things. Things I can’t explain. And I’ve come to believe it’s not so much about what you believe; it’s how hard you believe it.”

Rank: List Runner-Up

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