Mo is a bookbinder, but that’s not all;

He’s also a Silvertongue, as I recall,

Which means a book’s characters don’t have a choice

But to leap off the page at the sound of his voice.

He’s traveled with Meggie, his daughter, for years

In search of a novel that always disappears.

In Europe, at last Mo discovers a copy

And quickly escapes in his rundown jalopy,

For Dustfinger’s found him, a man he once knew

Who’s followed him closely and wants the book too.

Both Meggie and Mo stay with Aunt Elinor,

A haughty old lady who owns books galore.

But Dustfinger brings bandits to the chalet,

Who take them all captive and haul them away

To Capricorn’s village, where Capricorn waits

To force Mo to use his gift inside his gates.

For Mo had read Capricorn, Basta, and Dust

Right out of Inkheart; thus, his voice he won’t trust

For when they came out, his wife Resa went in.

He’s sought the book since and just now found its twin.

Mo reads riches out of Arabian Nights,

As well as a boy named Farid, but Mo fights

When Capricorn burns Inkheart without remorse.

Dustfinger craves home, so he’s sad too, of course.

Dustfinger finds that Mo’s wife has been read

Already from Inkheart to serve Cap instead.

He helps all escape in the hopes that they’ll find

Inkheart with its author, leaving Resa behind.

They locate Fenoglio, thrilled his book’s come to life,

And leave Meggie there and go back for Mo’s wife.

Then Meggie is nabbed with Fenoglio, who

Discovers that she is a Silvertongue too.

After much capturing and escaping as well,

Capricorn has forced Meggie to read and raise hell

In the form of the Shadow, a monster he had,

To kill the old author, plus her mom and dad.

But by reading the writing she writes on her arm,

She keeps the huge Shadow from causing them harm.

Instead, it attacks Capricorn, for he’s sinned,

And both he and his men blow away in the wind.

At last, all is well, and they leave (though I’ll note

That Fenoglio entered the world that he wrote).

And Dust, who is more than the fruit of a pen,

Goes back to his world and his wife once again.

_________________

 

As a film, Inkheart is not the best fantasy adventure out there, but it’s quite entertaining and features some good performances. As an adaptation of a book, it takes quite a few liberties with the source material but, overall, seems much closer to the spirit and original appeal of the book than Eragon does.

First, the good things: Brendan Fraser is likable as Mo, and Eliza Hope Bennett is cute as Meggie, his daughter, though her English accent is confusing alongside Brendan Fraser’s lack of one. Both of them take a while to get into their roles, in my opinion, but the standout is Paul Bettany as Dustfinger, who brings his character’s pathos and moral struggle to life through mere looks. He, as well as Helen Mirren as Elinor and Jim Broadbent as Fenoglio, fit their roles like a glove and are evidence of good casting. The special effects aren’t bad, especially the impressive Shadow in the finale.

Now the bad: The ending of a movie can really hurt or help it. Sometimes it ruins what is otherwise a good film (Fried Green Tomatoes), while other times it merely detracts a bit (Howl’s Moving Castle). This is another example of the latter, but it does drive me crazy. The unrealistic finale tells me two things: (a) that Meggie is a prodigy who can somehow copy the writing style of a book she’s never read in no time, and (b) that her arm is extremely long. Also, the filmmakers set up so many potential elements for the sequel Inkspell, from Fenoglio’s comparing Mo to a blue jay to having basically the same open ending as the book. But then they tack on the scene where Mo sends Dustfinger back and completely demolish any hope for a second film. No bad guys escaping, no Orpheus, no Farid pining after Dustfinger. That last point is the most maddening; the film’s Farid saying “I can’t follow him” is soooooo out of character, I can hardly stand it. That being said, the final scene of Dustfinger running to meet his wife Roxanne after nine years apart is touching (especially for my VC) and almost makes up for the stupid line that preceded it.

Nevertheless, Inkheart has the same thrill Fenoglio feels in seeing beloved characters come to life, and, as a fan of film and books, I think combining the two is a brilliant idea.

Best line: (Meggie) “You’ve been to Persia, then?”  (Elinor) “Yes, a hundred times. Along with St. Petersburg, Paris, Middle Earth, distant planets, and Shangri-La.”

VC’s best line:  (Capricorn) “Why would we ever want to go back, when your world is so accommodating, with your telephones and your guns and … what’s that sticky stuff called?”  (Basta) “Duct tape.”  (Capricorn) “Yes, duct tape.  I love duct tape!”

 

Artistry: 4

Characters/Actors: 5

Entertainment: 6

Visual Effects: 6

Originality: 5

Watchability: 6

Other (poor ending): -5

 

TOTAL: 27 out of 60

 

Tomorrow – #352: Meet the Robinsons

© 2014 S. G. Liput

In the land of Alagaesia (which you might have read about),

Noble Dragon Riders prospered till a traitor stamped them out.

Now this Galbatorix rules the kingdom with an iron fist,

While the Varden, freedom fighters, still have courage to resist.

 

A farmer lad named Eragon, while hunting, finds a stone,

Which turns out to be a dragon egg (whoever would have known?).

Their minds are linked by a single touch, which really rather hurt.

His dragon learns to fly and sprouts in one big growing spurt.

Saphira (that’s her name) takes Eragon upon her wing

And saves him when his farm’s attacked by Ra’zac from the king.

Then Brom, a storyteller, comes and spirits them away

And says the Varden need them now; besides, they cannot stay.

He trains the boy in fighting and in magic and in flight,

And they kill the dreaded Ra’zac in a thrilling forest fight.

But Eragon has visions of an elf who needs his aid,

So leaves to save this Arya from a strong and wicked Shade.

He finds her, yet his mentor Brom, who also was a Rider,

Is wounded, but Saphira comes, and they escape astride her.

When Brom is dead, and Arya needs some medical attention,

They find the Varden’s hideout (with a guy I didn’t mention).

The Varden greet the villain’s troops with arrow and with blade,

While Eragon and dragon too fight Durza (that’s the Shade).

They win, but both are badly hurt yet manage to survive,

And all sing songs about the two who’ve kept their hope alive.

________

Eragon was a divisive movie when it came out in 2006 because it wasn’t particularly well-received by critics or fans of the book, and, as a lover of the Inheritance cycle (pretty much everything except the end), I can see why. As a film adaptation, it moves as fast as it can through the source material, which is several hundred pages long, while glossing over the details that fans especially loved (no were-cat with Angela the fortune-teller, no romantic interest for Roran, no visit to Teirm or Dras-Leona). As a film by itself, it feels much too rushed, for the same reason mentioned above. So much happens in a short time that there’s little room for character development or anything that does not immediately add to the plot. Plus, the script is pretty poor, and, like Willow, the plot bears much resemblance to Star Wars.

All that being said, Eragon is not without its good points, which earn it inclusion on this list. The Hungarian scenery (as opposed to Peter Jackson’s New Zealand) is spectacular, and the special effects are fantastic, especially Saphira, the finest movie dragon till Smaug recently came on the scene. Although most of the cast is rather wasted with roles that should have been bigger (and were in the book), Jeremy Irons stands out as best embodying his character. His presence heightens every scene he’s in, making Brom’s death truly sad. Saphira’s carrying him aloft that he may die “as a Dragon Rider” was the one improvement over the book. Rachel Weisz’s lovely voice as Saphira also brings the dragon to life beautifully. Since the filmmakers obviously left some plot lines open, it’s a shame they never made the sequels into films.

My VC likes the film even more than I and would probably have it higher on her list.

Best line (not much good to choose from): “Better to ask forgiveness than permission.”

Artistry: 3

Characters/Actors: 3

Entertainment: 5

Visual Effects: 7

Originality: 2

Watchability: 6

TOTAL: 26 out of 60

Tomorrow – #359: Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band (yes, that’s right)

© 2014 S. G. Liput

Willow Ufgood is a hobbit—I mean Nelwyn—in a land

Where tall people called Daikinis will dismiss them out of hand.

In this world of tricks and fantasy, a baby girl is born

Who is destined to dethrone old Queen Bavmorda. Thus she’s sworn

That this child with the mark upon its arm will not outlive her,

But the girl is saved and sent adrift upon a rushing river.

Willow’s family finds the baby, and they keep her fed and clean,

Till it’s clear that she’s a danger, being wanted by the queen.

It’s decided then that Willow, though he’s weak and rather teeny,

Must take the child out and give her to the right Daikini.

(Before he leaves, the village sage, who gave to him this mission,

Lets Willow know he has a chance to be a great magician.)

 

The first Daikini Willow meets makes him wish to start again,

For it’s a scoundrel in a cage who calls himself Madmartigan.

When no one else will listen to a peck (a Nelwyn slur),

Willow gives the girl to him because he says he’ll care for her.

A brownie steals the girl from Mad (it wasn’t very hard),

And captures Willow too and puts him under tiny guard.

But then a fairy frees him (she is floating, ghostly sorta)

And says he must protect the girl from evil Queen Bavmorda.

He takes Elora Danan (that’s the girl if you haven’t guessed)

And meets with ol’ Madmartigan, who can’t resist a quest.

With two rambunctious brownies, Willow finds one Fin Raziel,

A sorceress enchanted as a possum by a spell.

They’re captured then by Sorsha, who’s the daughter of the queen,

But escape once in the mountains in a quite exciting scene.

Madmartigan and Sorsha, thanks in part to magic dust,

Find they each might love the other, whom they once held in disgust.

In a thrilling castle battle, the adventure won’t relent,

As they fight trolls and a dragon Willow makes by accident.

In spite of Sorsha’s joining them, Elora is abducted

By a general who takes her to Bavmorda, as instructed.

 

Willow, Sorsha, and Madmartigan, Raziel, some soldiers too

Travel to Bavmorda’s castle to at least attempt rescue.

There they try to think of some way to get past the enemy line,

But Bavmorda laughs at everyone and turns them into swine.

But Willow, who protects himself, now finally succeeds

In transforming Fin Raziel back to the human form she needs.

She cuts the animal army’s sudden transformation short,

And the next day, by a skillful bluff, they storm the enemy fort.

Though Bavmorda tries to send Elora to the netherworld,

Willow, Sorsha, and Raziel come in to save the baby girl.

When Bavmorda seems victorious and only Willow stands,

He employs a trick to make Elora vanish from his hands.

Bavmorda then is livid and attempts to cast a spell,

When lightning strikes her magic wand and sends the queen to…hell?

 

Thus Willow is the hero, and Elora’s safe and sound,

And Sorsha and Madmartigan share in love newfound.

Willow’s honored by his village for his part in their land’s freeing

And his chance to be the sorcerer he’s always dreamed of being.

______

 

Willow is an action-adventure-romance-comedy-fantasy, combining a story by George Lucas with Ron Howard’s direction. Having seen it again, it probably deserves a higher place on the list because it’s a pretty good member of the fantasy genre. Yet for all its exciting scenes and groundbreaking (at the time) special effects, it’s also strangely forgettable.

It’s really a great movie, with a lovely James Horner score and some terrific action scenes, particularly the snow toboggan sequence, which may have inspired a similar scene in Sinbad: Legend of the Seven Seas. And yet for all its apparent originality, it also feels rather derivative. Bavmorda’s campaign to kill a newborn monarch is reminiscent of King Herod in the Bible. Likewise, Elora’s being set adrift on the river recalls Moses in the basket. The banter about being heroes makes Willow and Meegosh sound like Sam and Frodo in The Lord of the Rings, while their capture by brownies mirrors a similar scene in Gulliver’s Travels. The Lord of the Rings especially feels like an inspiration (a small person comes upon something of great worth and must go on a quest, proving that no one is too small to be a hero).

George Lucas’s involvement offers another point of comparison that is more and more obvious when you think about it. It’s Star Wars meets Lord of the Rings, with a little Harry Potter thrown in long before J. K. Rowling began her series. Willow is Luke Skywalker, with sorcery standing in for the Force; Bavmorda is the seemingly unconquerable emperor; Madmartigan is the skillful, roguish Han Solo; the brownies are the comic relief droids; Airk is the friend-at-arms Lando; Fin Raziel is the elderly sage Obi-wan Kenobi; the two-headed dragon looks a little like the space worm in Empire Strikes Back; Kael with his skull helmet is Darth Vader (I almost expected Kael to start wheezing); and Sorsha is the princess Leia, though her changing from bad to good is a notable difference. (I did think that her turning against her mother just for the sake of love was a bit forced. An explicit moment of her realizing Bavmorda’s villainy would have been welcome.)

All that being said, Willow is an impressive precursor to modern fantasy and a testing ground for morphing technology, which was perfected in The Abyss and Terminator 2. The scenery is spectacular, and the score is nice, though not as memorable as others. The babies playing Elora Danan have adorable and very expressive faces that make for some hilarious looks. The brownies are both annoying and funny at once, offering cute characters for children, but the dragon’s head exploding makes Willow not quite kiddie fare. Still, as a fan of fantasy, I had to put it on the list.

Best line (from the brownies, of course): “Your mother was a lizard!”

Artistry: 4

Characters/Actors: 4

Entertainment: 6

Visual Effects: 4

Originality: 2

Watchability: 6

 

TOTAL: 26 out of 60

 

Tomorrow – #361: Megamind

© 2014 S. G. Liput